Try Writing Something New
For Sh**s and Giggles Blog
I was browsing Amazon for what sells best in Indie books with no particular genre in mind. Research says that Spiritual and Fiction genres are still popular (the genres I write in so yay). Horror always is and so is Romance, some books combine the two which was new to me.
With puzzled look I started at half dressed gorgeous men and scantily clad women on the book covers, oh my! No wonder these sell so well. These are of course, the hot stories, the steamy, romance, sexy kind (definitely not my genre). So I thought I would try it. Very much lacking in imagination for the big S word fantasy category, to balance I thought I would throw in the spiritual or try to. So, it goes a little something like this:
The "little nothin' chubby one's eyes locked with the gargantuan but buffed bumpkin's eyes. His magnetic pull got her off the couch for a while and he transported her to the bedroom. Where he comes from no one know because she barely leaves the house. Seemingly, he transported himself into the room by osmosis. Or something.
This is where I stop character and plot building because I am laughing at myself too hard. That's ok from what I understand there is not much plot to these books anyway. I don't really know because I have honestly never read one. So, skipping ahead to the steamy part I think I'll add a little psychic ability to it. Why not.
Her mouth met his and immediately a stream of clairvoyance filled her mind with images of the thousand pairs of lips before hers that had rested on his face. Slightly aghast, but undeterred she shook her head slightly. Then visions of his fantasies raced through her head with a life of their own, complete with orgies and threesomes and she withdrew her tongue, disguising the "eww," with a moan. As he tried to make it to 2nd base clairaudience kicked in and she could psychically hear a woman nagging him, "honey, did you take the garbage out?" That's it, his jig was up. Still immersed in his energy her mind opened to yet a different spiritual platform where a row of little demons were observing him. Up she rose quicker than a bedsheet out of hell and threw him out.
The End.
That's why I can't write the steamy, romance stuff.
*
Listicles Sets if you want to try writing something new. The top five selling categories for hard copy books on Amazon are:
Memoirs and Biographies.
Self Help.
Religion and Spirituality.
Health, Fitness, and Dieting.
Politics and Social Sciences.
The top five selling categories for ebooks on Amazon are:
Religion and Spirituality.
Biographies and Memoirs.
Business and Money.
Self Help.
Cookbooks, food, and vine.
The top five more profitable categories on Amazon.com are:
Romance/Erotica ($1.44 billion).
Crime/Mystery ($728.2 million).
Religious/Inspirational ($720 million).
Science Fiction/Fantasy ($590.2 million).
Horror ($79.6 million).
The top five bestselling genres of audiobook are:
Literature & Fiction.
Mystery, Thriller & Suspense.
Science Fiction.
Fantasy.
Romance.
Business & Money.
The top ten most competitive Amazon categories are:
Romance -> Contemporary.
Literature & Fiction -> Contemporary Fiction -> Women.
Romance -> New Adult & College.
Literature & Fiction -> Contemporary Fiction -> Romance.
Literature & Fiction -> Women -> Romance.
Literature & Fiction -> Genre Fiction -> Coming of Age.
Romance -> Mystery & Suspense -> Suspense.
Science Fiction & Fantasy -> Fantasy -> Paranormal & Urban.
Literature & Fiction -> Genre Fiction -> Erotica.
Literature & Fiction -> Women -> Mystery, Thriller & Suspense -> Women Sleuths.
The top ten least competitive Amazon categories are:
Nonfiction -> Science -> Experiments, Instruments & Measurement -> Microscopes & Microsocopy.
Nonfiction -> Business & Money -> Taxation -> Corporate.
Business & Money -> Taxation -> Corporate.
Science -> Experiments, Instruments & Measurement -> Microscopes & Microsocopy.
Professional & Technical -> Engineering -> Civil -> Hydrology.
Nonfiction -> Professional & Technical -> Engineering -> Civil -> Hydrology.
Nonfiction -> Science -> Experiments, Instruments & Measurement -> Weights & Measures.
Science -> Experiments, Instruments & Measurement -> Weights & Measures.
Nonfiction -> Crafts, Hobbies & Home -> How-to & Home Improvements -> Masonry.
Crafts, Hobbies & Home -> How-to & Home Improvements -> Masonry.
Listicles compliments of Bubblecow.com
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About the Creator
Canuck Scriber L.Lachapelle Author
Published Poet and Author. Making rainy days feel like Sundays with words.
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Comments (8)
Love it! Especially your little stab at writing romance. Deliciously appropriate treatment of the tripe normally served.
I still love browsing through an honest to goodness dusty bookstore for the hidden gems. Romance, bah humbug. Crime, mystery, fantasy and weird stuff is where I will be. Interesting list overall.
Thank you for the information. And clearly, I will never write a romance novel... 🤮
That is a fun and interesting article, I doubt I would make any headway in any of the categories, mainly because I am so lazy
Lol, I can never write romance. Horror all the way hehehehe!
That might have been an AI generated story, you read? Lol the wording is definitely inhuman who has not experienced sex.
We're the little demons his kids? Lol. Nicely done.
Steamy scenes are tough. I used to write them under a different pen name lol. Interesting statistics on what’s popular. Wish I had more of a knack for the mystery/crime genre. Oh, well - they say it’s better to write what you know.