Politigram Survivor

The modern Far-Right believes itself the heir of “European culture” and the last in a long lineage of torch-bearers, upholding civilisation through virtue, wisdom and strength against a tide of “degenerate third-worlders”. In fact, the version of “European culture” they claim is a bastardised, homogenisation of ancient Greek, Roman, Celtic, Germanic and Near East cultures retconned into a cohesive identity despite the historical differences between these groups, and fuelled by the colonial “othering” of non-European races.

“European culture” does exist now, but is a modern invention fraught with violence, prejudice and caveats, precluding the sense of cultural pride Far-Right accounts try so desperately to coat themselves in. They set their profile pictures as Leonidas, Augustus or some other great leader from antiquity to LARP as though they are cut from the same cloth, never realising their worldview is based on very little of substance.

This image is significant to me because in 2016-2018, I very much fell into the alt-right pipeline that continues to radicalise young men and shape online discourse. I fell down the rabbit hole and into Facebook groups with actual fascists, where I was told my culture was under threat; a conspiracy against white people. There was a rage in me at the injustice I perceived, and a feeling that my chance at a good life was being stripped away by forces beyond my control, and I needed someone to blame. I said things online and in person that I deeply regret.

At the heart of it all was a terrible fear of loss, perpetuated by online misinformation. I was too young to recognise the malicious nature of the people I was talking to, and uncritically swallowed their propaganda whole.

Thankfully, people didn’t give up on me and don’t hold the stupid, racist and ill-informed things I said against me. I went to university, fell in love, read a lot and met people from different walks off life to grow past my narrow-mindedness though exposure. I learned how foolish and misguided I had been when my profile picture was a marble statue, and had the privilege to grow past that stage of my life. But I still feel so ashamed of it all.