Making A Short Story Less Long

Anne Bernays and Pamela Painter — What If? Writing Exercise for Fiction Writers prompts

The Exercise — Here are the events that might make a long short story. Write a scenario in which you indicate

+ Where you would place a full scene or incidental scene.

+ Where you would use summaries, either narrative summaries or summarized scenes and indirect discourse.

The Objective - To learn to identify which parts of a story should be presented in a scene and which parts of a story should be summarized. To develop an understanding of pace.

Here is the story to use for the exercise:

In her final year in medical school in the 1970s, Ellen fell in love with a young intern at the teaching hospital. His name was Gamal, and he came from Lebanon. Although Gamal was not political himself, his younger brothers were involved in radical Arab politics.

Ellen's New England Jewish family had always been liberal. Her father, Mark, was a lawyer who had defended Black Panthers in the 1960s and antiwar activists in the 1970s. Her mother, Sarah, a writer, was equally liberal. They were both fervently pro-Israel.

When Ellen brought Gamal home for the winter holidays, the situation grew very tense as one by one, Israel, religion, politics, and child-rearing practices seemed to crop up in their conversations. Although Ellen was uncomfortable at times, she felt that love was more important than politics.

Mark and Sarah were meticulously polite and tolerant in Gamal's company, but they worried in private. They'd always supported Ellen's decisions, but now, they thought she was about to ruin her life.

The wedding was set for June at the parents' house in Connecticut. It would be a small affair because relatives on both sides would refuse to come. But Mark and Sarah rationalized a lot and put the very best face on it.

The day came. Everything was ready. There was going to be a civil ceremony - a compromise - and then a garden party at Ellen's home.

When Mark got up that morning, he turned on the television news. The lead story was about a bombing and the destruction of a TWA plane in Greece by terrorists. Gamal's two brothers had been arrested as prime suspects. Mark and Sarah confronted Ellen and Gamal

Now resolve the story...

When finishing her medical school experience at the teaching hospital, Ellen met and fell in love with Gamal, who was also interning there.

Ellen's family was Jewish, and even though they were pro-Israel, they had concerns about this relationship. They always supported Ellen's decisions, and now they thought her relationship and upcoming marriage might ruin her life.

Ellen was in love, and even though some conversations with her parents and Gamal made her uncomfortable, she believed that love conquers all. She and Gamal had decided together to back away from politics wherever possible.

Ellen's parents were concerned but would never say anything in front of Gamal. They supported the couple by hosting their wedding at their house. They were all aware that many relatives on both sides would not attend due to their own political beliefs.

Ellen and Gamal were okay with this, and when the news came just before the wedding that Gamal's younger brothers were suspects in a suspected terrorist bombing, they decided to carry on with the wedding.

They knew their love would carry them through all of the concerns for them and the gossip that would go along with what just occurred with Gamal's brothers.

They would look forward to their careers being successful and to the family they were planning to have. Gamal believed that his brothers, if they were involved, would have to deal with the consequences of their actions. Their parents made that really clear to them when they were growing up.