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It Felt Like A Movie

Writing prompts on gratitude from Rupi Kaur

By Denise E LindquistPublished 13 days ago • 3 min read
Top Story - April 2024
30
It Felt Like A Movie
Photo by Gabrielle Henderson on Unsplash

Describe a moment in your life that felt like a movie.

After a respiratory code, I was placed on a respirator and in an induced coma. When they decided to bring me out of that, it felt like I was being tortured, as my hands were tied and my face was covered with a mask. A man was sitting next to me that I didn't recognize.

As tears were rolling down my face, I heard a familiar voice and realized it was Felicia. She was telling me that I was going to be okay. She said that I just need to hang on. At that point, I believed I was in a movie, or at least hearing my friend in a movie.

And then I thought maybe I was just dreaming, except it was all so real.

The other voices I heard were two other friends. I didn't see any of them but I heard their voices or maybe I was told they were there. The fear and the tears stopped.

I realized it wasn't a dream, and even though it wasn't torture, it was. I equate it to the bone marrow biopsy, chemotherapy, a mammogram and pap smear, a colonoscopy, the chiropractor, and acupuncture sometimes. I've needed this but I don't have to like it.

I didn't get to come out of that at the moment as my respiration wasn't enough yet on my own. When I did I was off the machine, no longer tied down with no mask. Then again it did feel like that memory may have been a movie.

A few years later I had an eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) as I couldn't talk about the experience without crying.

And that man sitting next to me was husband number three. In the movie, I believed I was married to husband number two. My daughter explained that the reason I thought that was because the respiratory therapist who was treating me looked like the ex-husband, who is a respiratory therapist.

I felt so bad about that. And as soon as I got over that, which was fairly quickly really. I told him about that and then asked why he left me when I was dying. He said the machines were making noise, the nurse came in right away, so he thought it would be a good time to go to the bathroom.

He had no idea I was coding. My daughter saw them running down the hall with me when she arrived at the hospital.

I have definite memory gaps due to that experience. My husband will ask, "Do you remember when we..." Nope, I'm sorry I do not." And sometimes I have a vague memory that again feels like it may have been a movie. The way I know it wasn't a movie is because the hubby remembers it clearly.

My gratitude for this experience was that I couldn't deal with all of what was going on straight forward, so I could experience it as maybe a movie, maybe a dream!

I am so grateful to be alive. I have added so many more grandchildren and great-grandchildren than I ever expected to get to know. I have a husband that I know now that I can count on! He will never leave me again to go to the bathroom after hearing about it from me several times since! JK

The truth is that many days it is hard to imagine that time happening that way. I was fortunate to not have to remember the bone marrow biopsy that my husband said he wasn't having without being put under. He said I screamed out in pain. I have no memory of that.

I have very little memory now of the days I spent in the hospital. I remember a housekeeper told me that she was told I was the worst code they had on that floor. I guess that is saying something. It also says it wasn't my time. My experience with death was not scary or bad.

It was but a moment of time in my life that felt like a movie of someone else's life experience.

LifeWriting ExercisePromptsChallenge
30

About the Creator

Denise E Lindquist

I am married with 7 children, 27 grands, and 12 great-grandchildren. I am a culture consultant part-time. I write A Poem a Day in February for 8 years now. I wrote 4 - 50,000 word stories in NaNoWriMo. I write on Vocal/Medium weekly.

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Comments (20)

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  • Esala Gunathilake4 days ago

    Congratulations on your top story.

  • ROCK 11 days ago

    I am also wanting to share that your take on, "like a movie" being true gives it much more credence; it certainly feels like a movie I don't want to see.

  • Anna 11 days ago

    Congrats on Top Story!🥳🥳🥳

  • ROCK 11 days ago

    Newly subscribed! I look forward to discovering more of your writing!

  • Asad Message11 days ago

    patience is bitter, But it Bears sweet fruit

  • Lamar Wiggins11 days ago

    That was intense! So glad you are still with us. Thank you for sharing and congrats on your TS.

  • Andrea Corwin 11 days ago

    Congrats on TS ❤️

  • Andrea Corwin 11 days ago

    Hmmm, so you didn't see the white light or spirits of dead relatives? What a great story, thanks for sharing and glad you came back!!

  • Ameer Bibi12 days ago

    Congratulations 🎉🎉🎉 for top story You're on a roll! Your motivation is igniting a path to greatness.

  • Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊

  • Phil Flannery12 days ago

    I'm glad you made it through such an ordeal. Thanks for sharing.

  • Margaret Brennan12 days ago

    congratulations on TS. this is a horrifying experience. while I wasn't in a coma, induced or not, I was on a respirator for eight hours. my heart and lungs stopped worked during surgery. bad reaction to the anesthesia. (you can read my story on "My Time on a Ventilator". ... I'm really glad to came through so you could share this with us.

  • The Dani Writer12 days ago

    That is major intensity to live through--double WHOA!!! You are living proof that the miraculous exists alongside the medicine. Also, why it is so important to have respectful clear communication around patients at varying levels of consciousness, as it cannot be ascertained what they hear or will remember. My own medical emergency left me with a total abhorrence for sedation drugs even though I'd prepared them countless times for patients. Everyone's biochemistry is different and when I was given them, it literally felt like I died. Never again! So glad this was made top story and moreso that you lived to tell the tale.

  • Babs Iverson12 days ago

    Wow!!! Have had experiences where it felt like a dream or movie. Glad you came through and it's best not to remember the pain!!! Congratulations on Top Story!!!💕❤️❤️

  • Gabriel Huizenga12 days ago

    What a journey!! Thank you for sharing this harrowing and memorable experience- a real window into your story. And congrats on the Top Story! :)

  • Christy Munson12 days ago

    That experience sounds ghastly, and I feel for you for having experienced it. Definitely sounds like a movie. A horror flick. Congratulations on a much deserved Top Story!

  • Shirley Belk12 days ago

    Sounds like you went through a horror movie, though. I'm glad you came out on this side for awhile longer, though!

  • Oh I remember this! You've talked about this in another piece of yours but I'm so sorry, I don't recall the title 😅

  • Mark Graham13 days ago

    Life experiences teach us all sorts of things and to accept various others as well.

  • “M”13 days ago

    I'm happy you are the great person you are now 🫰🏼

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