No Problem!

It’s been a grueling winter and I must admit I haven’t given my car the tender loving care it deserves. I probably hit every pothole from my house to work and back five days a week. Now my steering pulls to the right and the front end shimmies at highway speed. Just to make things more interesting, the check engine light went from occasionally blinking yellow to a steady red. It is time to pay my neighborhood mechanic a visit.

Speedy Auto Repair is one block from my office, so it made sense to drop off my faithful buggy with them on the way to work and pick it up on my way home. Just to make sure they could get all the repairs done before I got out of work, I called and made an appointment. “Sure, bring it in. It’ll be ready by five. No problem!”

The “No problem” should have been the first red flag, but I remained blissfully oblivious. I arrived at Speedy first thing in the morning only to find the shop closed. Red flag number two, I had some time before I needed to be at work, so I waited. About fifteen minutes after the posted opening time, the first person arrived and unlocked the door. I gave him a couple of minutes to get settled and walked in.

“Hi, I have an appointment to have my car repaired today.”

“Okay, give me a minute. The coffee is almost ready. Want some?”

“No thanks. I have to get to work. Can we go over what I need to be done so I can leave?”

“Okay, sure! What’s the problem?”

“Well, the front end needs aligning and the tires are out of balance. The check engine light is on steady red, so I imagine it needs a tune-up. While it’s in here, you might as well change the oil too. Do you think it can all be done by five?”

“No problem! Once my guys get in, we’ll get right on it. See you at five.”

There was that no problem phrase again. Red flag number three.

Just as I was leaving, I saw several other men and one woman pull into the lot, all with large coffee cups in hand. The man I was speaking with had just opened a bay door. That’s when I saw it. The alignment machine was dismantled, pieces scattered on the garage floor. Concerned, I walked back over to the man I assumed was the manager.

“Is that your only alignment machine?”

“Yeah, the tech is coming this morning to finish repairing it. We’ll work on the other stuff first and do the front-end work last. Don’t worry, we got you covered.”

For me, “We got you covered,” is in the same category as, “No problem.” I still don’t know why I didn’t take my car and leave, but I was running on blind faith at that point. I walked down the block to work. Several times during the day, I called for updates and each time was reassuringly told that all was well. Unfortunately, the little voice in the back of my mind kept saying, ‘I don’t think so.’ Of course, I didn’t listen.

Five o’clock finally arrived and I couldn’t leave work fast enough. My freshly repaired car was waiting for me just one block away. As I got closer to the shop, I spotted my car parked in exactly the same spot where I had left it. No problem. They finished it and parked in the same slot. Unfortunately, my little voice was not convinced.

The bay doors were all closed, and the office door was locked. I walked to my car and saw a piece of paper tucked under the windshield wiper. The note read:

The alignment machine is still down because of a shortage of parts.

We could not do a tune-up because your car requires updated software we don’t have.

Your keys are behind the visor.

We did the oil change for free!

No problem.

You’re welcome!