The Flow

Once I was in the flow everything happened fast. I still remember rising early in the morning in Cairns and saying goodbye at a corner to Jen and then walking to the airport. A few hours later I was in Cairns and a couple days later I was looking at the Pacific Ocean en route to California and then Colorado. The wheels were turning for Japan though. I had applied for The JET Program from Australia. At that time though I had no clue what would happen. So often my life has plopped me right back down on Main Street in Aspen, Colorado and told me to be patient and start over and so there I was. The musical ringing from Australia hadn't subsided and soon I met up with an old friend and we formed a makeshift band. I got a regular gig for apre ski and met quite a few music connections. The glitter was still pouring out that year from Australia and everything was in movement.

My job was working at one of the hotels in the downtown Aspen core. It was a transitional year. The location was a good place to work, but I found there was a lot for me to learn. It was hard to keep good energy and not get lazy. I found I was always hungry and then after I ate I was tired. I couldn't wait until lunch came around and afterwards it was difficult to fight the late afternoon blues. My savior was getting outside. I felt that running up a mountain would put me back into a perfect state and the thoughts would become cleaner as well. After I worked out I was tired though and this I thought was normal.

I had accepted that this was the way things had to be. It had been this way in high school and then college. I recalled in college how I wanted nothing more than to be productive and study. I would walk to different places on campus to seek out the ideal place, but in actuality I wasted a lot of time staring at a text book. My energy level was useless after eating and especially after dinner. The same issue was following me when I worked at the hotel. How could I have positive energy?

In the music realm things were advancing. I had met a connection in Aspen and he was inviting me to play down in Denver. We were developing some good songs and the flow was growing. At the same time, Japan was progressing forward. I had been accepted to an interview in Denver.

One thing that performing music has always helped me with is interviewing. Attending Colorado University at the time I did allowed me to learn from a lot of other great songwriters. Freshmen year in Sewall Hall put me in the weaving of life with Caroline Polechek and I would get into these fantastic conversations with her. On one occasion we got to talking about performing and I inquired on how to best be a good performer on stage. She proceeded by explaining to me how performing was a personality itself. There's a personality you have with your parents and then your friends and then your lovers and then there is one for performance. She suggested that I host my own radio show as she had found that to be a great way to develop "stage personality" I had found that this personality was also very present when going through interviews and for that reason and maybe for that reason only I got into the Jet Program. There probably were other reasons as well and now that I look back on it there definitely were, but at that time my ego was convinced that it was my interview skills that got me to Japan that day. It may have been my ancestors calling me back or maybe it was a combination of factors, but as I would explore more into the spiritual path I would start to really notice more and more how I was the witness and not the doer of my life. Everything had been laid out for me it would seem, although it would only reveal that after I had made the motions.

I had been accepted to Japan, but at the same time my music was advancing as well. There is a quote somewhere that says that the butterfly comes right when you leave and it did naturally. As I was starting to prepare for Japan I was also seeing opportunities open in music. About ten days before my departure I received an email from a contact in Denver that was ready to book me. It's interesting how life has worked like that.

I was excited on the new journey though. It was mysterious and adventurous and I liked flinging myself to the wind. I wanted to taste more of what Australia had offered.

At the end of my interview that would somehow get me to Japan and in the JET program, I took the advice of a professor from college that hopefully is growing lemons now Italy. When they asked me if I had any questions I explained to the interviewers that I would probably be doing this a lot in my life, which has been true and that I would love for them to list out what were some of my strengths and weaknesses in my interview. The weakness they stated was this. They noted how I seemed very confident in intimidating situations, which they liked, and they loved that I was in love with Japanese culture and that I enjoyed teaching, but that I hadn't expressed to them how I felt I could help if I went to Japan. In other words, it was selfish in the end a "what about me" motivation. I walked away from that interview definitely pondering their advice and I thought of how this was true.

Again I would soon go back to Eastern part of the world and yet, little did I know the experience would teach that lesson to me repeatedly in different ways. It almost seemed that the interviewer let me into Japan so that I could learn that lesson and I think I did repeatedly, but in the ways and experiences that I could hardly fathom.