Black Lives Matter

Let me preface this article by saying I in no way think this is going to change anything. I know one person alone isn't going to change the world, and I know it's going to take a lot more than me writing an article about how I feel about the black lives matter movement. But what I have to say needs to be said, and it needs to be said by a lot of people to make a difference.

I didn't know what to say for a while. I kept my mouth shut, and I couldn't put my feelings into words. Why? Because I don't understand. I don't understand what it's like to be afraid to walk around the neighborhood alone. I don't understand what it's like for my heart to drop to my stomach when I see a cop, or be afraid of getting pulled over. I don't understand what it's like to fear the people who are supposed to protect me. And I understand that I will never understand.

But what I do know is what it's like to not appreciate or even notice the amount of privilege I have. I know what it's like to know I can find hair care supplies at my local Walmart. I know what it's like to not worry about what people are going to think about me because of the color of my skin. I know what it's like to not think twice about calling the cops. When my car was stolen, the cops were my second call, second only to my mom. I wasn't afraid that they would think it was my fault, even though it was for leaving my keys in my car. I wasn't afraid that they would shove my case to the bottom of their pile. They asked me one time if this could be because I owed someone money, and after I said no once, they dropped that angle. I wasn't afraid that I wouldn't get treated fairly.

Honestly, I've got so much white privilege I don't even know how to recognize it half the time.

While scrolling through my social media feed, I was trying to figure out what I could do to help. I didn't know how I could do anything. Then I saw a friend post about how I could use my white privilege to make myself heard. I could speak up and know I would be heard, because I have white privilege that I never realized I could take advantage of. So it's time to use my voice, not to cover the voice of those who NEED this change, but to support them. To support people of color, my friends and family, and to make sure their voice is heard.

Now, I don't condone violence in any situation, but thinking about history, I understand why some people have turned to it. I remember when I lived in Baltimore, 6 years ago, and I could see peaceful protests from my dorm windows. What I also saw were those peaceful protesters being punished. For standing or walking, and shouting out how they felt. They were being punished for exactly what we are trying to tell people now. You want to know another thing I was thinking about through this entire thought process? Who am I to tell people how to react to a situation I've never been in? Who am I to tell people they're overreacting when I'm not the person who has lost family members to this societal flaw? I'm not that person, and I won't tell them how to react. Especially when I've seen them try to play nice and still lose family and friends.

It's time to take action. It's time to listen, and it's time to really hear. It's time to use our voice to show that we won't stand for this discrimination anymore. It's a learned trait, and it's time to unlearn it. Attend peaceful protests, share the stories of victims. Keep their memory alive, and make sure they didn't die in vain. We can't be silent any longer, because a change needs to happen. For your family, friends, and for humanity as a whole. We can't keep living this. People of color cannot keep living this. Unlearn this behavior and change it, now.

I'm angry, and you should be angry, too. But don't let your anger make this problem any worse. Let your anger fuel you into making a change. Stand up if you see acts of racism happening, no matter how small they seem. Attend a protest if there's one in your area. Reach out to your friends of color. Share the stories of those who died during this war that's been going on for hundreds of years. Focus on your behavior, and acknowledge your white privilege. Don't be an innocent bystander, because your silence speaks more than your voice in a time like this.

And to my friends, I see you. I hear you, and I am listening. I support you. Sometimes I will need your help, because I still don't know everything I can do to help you. But I'm ready, I'm willing, and I stand with you.