Entry No. 4

These shoes are NUDE! How did I end up with them? Well, it's a crazy story.

I got a $100 gift certificate to ALDO. There isn't one close to me, so I had to drive for over an hour to get there. I chose an ALDO gift card because I love shoes. I have a whole wall of shoes, and quite a few of my favorites are from ALDO. So, I drove.

I know some of you are going to say that I could have just shopped online and had the shoes delivered, but I wanted a perfect fit, and you can only get a perfect fit if you're in the store, trying them on in person.

So... I haven't been mall crawling in quite some time. I wandered up and down the ladies' section in the ALDO for over an hour without trying anything on. The shop girl was very polite, but she was looking at me, thinking, "Poor thing. This middle-aged woman has no idea how to buy shoes."

Finally, I got it through my thick skull what I had to do. I had to buy something. NOW! I did not want to drive back. I hated everything they had. Low heels? Open toes? Pastel shades? Sandals? I have nothing against how those things look on other people, but I have to work with the body I have and what looks good on me. They had nothing. And everything halfway decent was over a $100. From the colors and styles, it felt like they were aiming for two clientele with their spring line. One was baby women who are buying their first pair of high heels, like newborns who need something in a soft color with a smallish heel so they won't fall over like a baby deer on a trampoline. The other one is older women who have bent over all their lives, and they are not bending over for even one more thing. You can just see it on their faces if you suggest even a velcro buckle. They're done with you, and that's fair.

In the end, I bought a present for someone else. When you love shoes, you know everyone's size.

But I was crabby. So crabby. I was supposed to get a brilliant pair of shoes for myself. That was the promise of the ALDO's gift card.

So, yesterday, I was out and about. The air felt like shoes, like there was going to be a brilliant pair of high heels waiting for me. Sometimes, I get that feeling. Like I have been a good girl, and the universe wants to reward me. The universe knows I like being rewarded with high heels. It was in the air.

Without going out of my way or doing anything I wouldn't have done anyway, I received the shoes that the universe had for me. They have a different design and color from any of my other shoes. They were ALDO brand. They were originally $5.00, but the gal running the store knows me and gave me a discount, so they were $3.75.

I am a lily of the field.

Now, if you know me, and you might by now, I don't like nude shoes. That's why it was a new color for me, but why did I buy them now? It wasn't the low price tag. I just felt like the golden age of ALDO was over... At least for this year. And these were SO MUCH better than anything they had in the store. SO MUCH BETTER. So I snapped them up.

When I brought them home, I looked at my wardrobe and spotted a jean dress that looked just amazing with them. I even brought my daughter in to choose which shoes would go best with the dress, and she zeroed in on these girls, too.

Now, the story of the dress is just too crazy. First thing, I do not dress up to go shopping. I'm not doing that. I dress up to socialize. I might dress up if I'm going shopping with friends, but if I'm hitting up stores by myself, I am not dressing up. I dress comfortably and treat the entire thing like a trip to the gym. I'm going to walk hard all over this mall and get in my steps.

Anyway, I popped into Melanie Lyne. They had some really stunning formal dresses when I was in, but their statement piece was very like a dress I already owned, so I skipped the new arrivals and hit the clearance. In the clearance, I found a line rack of jean dresses that were marked down to $50ish. I really wanted a good jean dress, and I found one. It is so good. It's not like anything else as it hugs all the curves and has this flattering ruching down the chest. It's so pretty. I went and tried it on, and then I made a really big mistake. I left the changeroom and showed the salesgirls how good I looked in it. The saleswoman was 15-20 years older than me and insisted on showing me how to roll up the sleeves. I got a very distinct mother-vibe, as the last time a human being had told me how to roll up sleeves was when I was learning to dress myself, when I was still in a diaper. She did it with zero style, and she told me how lucky it was for me that she was there to teach me these things. After I got out of the dress, she tried to sell me accessories, like bulky bracelets and earrings. I informed her that my ears were not pierced (I have had so much trouble with freaking piercings... Uglk), and that my wrists were too small for those humongous bracelets to look good on me. When I got to the till to pay, she told me that I had switched the tags on the dress and that it was really $75 and not $55. I told her that all the jean dresses that were down that aisle were marked that way. She said then it was done in error, and I still had to pay $75+tax. She also wouldn't show me her computer screen. It was shady as F. And I kept thinking that if I hadn't talked to her at all, I would have been able to get her to honor the price on the tag.

Yeah, I still bought the dress, and I'm glad I did. Since then, I have seen hundreds of cheap, identical jean dresses. This dress is so good. When I think of it, I see stars. But I haven't gone into Melanie Lyne since, and when I see her label, I know it's good, but somehow it is covered with a little bit of hurt. It's the only place I've ever been accused of tag switching.