What would you think of me?

If you could understand me, what would you think of me?

Would you think that I am as funny as my family tells me?

Would you think that I am as caring as my best friends say?

Would you think I am as mean as the girl from third grade thinks I am?

Would you think I am as bitchy as people say I look?

Or would you think I am as lost as I think I am?

What would you think, Roo?

You turned 10 years old this past May, to my calculations and according to Google, that would put you somewhere in your 40s or 50s in human years. So you must be much wiser than I am. You must be smarter than I am. And you must have better judgment than I do. So what would you think, Roo?

You have seen my life flash before your eyes as much as I have and more than anyone else in my life. You are who I talk to about my problems. You are who I always have by my side when I’ve gone through any major life events. You have been there through every smile, every laugh, and every tear since I was 12 years old. Going on 22 years now this coming week, I’ve thought back on my life choices and I can’t help but think you would definitely have had an opinion if you could understand me. I have done so many things that I have second-guessed, I have done so many things I regret. What would you think, Roo?

If you could talk to me, what would you say?

Would you have told me to date that boy when I was a junior in high school?

Would you have told me to go to that college in California after high school?

Would you have told me to stay at Exeter for my senior year?

Would you have told me to stay away from those girls in junior high?

Would you have told me to try again with that boy my freshmen year of college?

Would you have told me to buy those shoes that I’ll never see again?

Would you have told me to get you a brother or sister?

What would you say, Roo?

You follow me around day after day. You call out to me all the time. You come to me when I am sad. You rub up against me when I am happy. You bother me when I am mad. You always choose to lay with me when I am asleep. Why do you do those things? Do you understand me? Do you understand how I am feeling and what I need in those times? What would say, Roo?

Now that I have asked all the questions I want to know, I say this:

You are my best friend. You are half my heart. I love that you come to me when I am feeling down. I love that you bother me when I am mad. It’s like you know I need you to calm me down. I read somewhere that cats absorb your negative energy. That is why they come near you when you have negative emotions. It is also why cats sleep all the time; they are releasing those bad energies. I believe in this a lot because it’s what you do for me. You lessen my bad moods and take away my pain. I don’t know how you do it, because you’re just a cat and you cant even talk to me. But you do.

As you get older, I see the changes it is making to you. You don’t play as much as you used to. You don’t run around as much as you used. Your hair on your chin is getting more white. As the days continue on, I just hope I made you as happy as you have made me. I hope your days were filled with happiness and wonderful memories. I don’t know what a successful day for a cat is but I hope you had lots of them. I am not writing this because I think you will be leaving me soon. I am not writing this because I am sad in anyway. I am just writing this simply to appreciate you.

I write this to you as you are laying in front me. You are watching me with your big black eyes and your pretty pink nose. What are you thinking, Roo? What would you say, Roo?

I love you.