The Annual Review

Rabbit Retail is a small business that was started at the height of a global pandemic, thanks to a dream and the loss of a job. Rabbit Retail, as the name suggests, sells all things rabbit. For your rabbit. For you with a rabbit on it. Just all the rabbit things. Rabbit Retail is now 1 whole year old, so it’s time for the first ever annual review. A lot can change in a year so the very first task on the agenda is a staff head count.

There is only 1 full-time employee, a human, the director, founder, management, CEO and CRL (Crazy Rabbit Lady). The remaining staff is made up of 8 part-time employees of the 4 legged variety.

It had been a very busy year and as a reward for everyone's hard work management has decided that one lucky individually will be crowned employee of the year! Management had elected to remove themself from the running to ensure that there can be no accusations of result fixing.

The first candidate for review is the office trouble-maker, Dandelion. As the current head of Market Exploration and Opening Doors, Dandelion has a lot of responsibility and she takes her job very seriously. There isn’t a single avenue that is left unexplored or un-sniffed. However, there have been a few instances over this last year where Dandelion had been caught defacing company property! The nibble marks in the table were the final straw and Dandelion was place on disciplinary action. It is therefore impossible for Dandelion to become employee of the year despite all her hand work. Moving forward into the next year she needs to work on respecting company boundaries and property.

Next up we have the newest member of the team, Sprinkles. Sprinkles is interning with Rabbit Retail with a view to take on a more permanent role in the future assuming the company is a good fit for her. Sprinkles is taking time to explore all elements of the company and has expressed an interest in focusing on HR. She is doing some excellent work but hasn’t been with the company long enough to earn the coveted employee of the year title.

Marshmallow, Rabbit Retail’s apprentice Snack Tester and apprentice Door Opener, joined the company at the same time as Sprinkles. Marshmallow has already shown significant skill in door opening and looks to be following closely in her mentor, Dandelion’s paw steps. Not only this, Marshmallow has also demonstrated a highly discerning pallet and a willingness to try every treat at least twice. Despite her admirable work, she, like Sprinkles, has not been with the company long enough to be name employee of the year.

Next up for review is the Quality Control Coordinator of Cushions and Beds, Brownie. He is very dedicated to his role; he takes his time to thoroughly examine every detail of each and every item that passes through his department. While his work is high quality he has not eligible for employee of the year due to some inappropriate behaviour in the workplace. As a next step Brownie should look into improving his relationships with other employees.

Casper is joint head of GDPR (Gerbil Data Protection and Recycling). One of Rabbit Retail’s fundamental values is to ensure that all products and services offered are as ethical and green as possible. Casper had done wonderful work in the shredding department, insuring at all excess paperwork is safely and securely disposed of.

Alongside Casper is his co-department head, Harley. A vigorous and dedicated worker who is always enthusiastic about his work. Harley has also been showing initiative by spending some time working in the Snack Testing department and has expressed a desire to potentially move towards working in both departments.

The Senior Manager of Litterbox Operations is Oreo. He has been with the company from the onset and truly loves his work. However, despite his love for his work there have been a few instances over the past year where Litterbox maintenance has been subpar with poos found in unusual and surprising locations.

The final member of staff at Rabbit Retail is Macaroon. Former Chief Nana (banana) Inspector, Snack Tester and Head of Security. She has recently been promoted to Grand Superviser and Rainbow Bridge Liaison. She has been an exceptional employee this year and her promotion was well earned although she will be sorely missed in her previous roles. As the only employee to have bee promoted this year Macaroon has already proven herself to be employee of the year all that remains is to present her with the title formally.

It has, therefore, been decided that Macaroon is Rabbit Retail’s first ever employee of the year! As Rabbit Retail goes forward into its second year of business it is certain that all employees, both 4 legged and 2 legged with be kept busy. As the human behind Rabbit Retail is my best friend, anyone who reads more of my writing will probably hear more about the bunnies and gerbils mentioned here.