Socrates’ Speedy Delivery Service

Instead of going to the pet store to get your supplies, why not let a Sulcata tortoise take care of it?

It might be a slight wait, but I can assure you the service is excellent.

Introducing….

Socrates, the fastest (and slowest) delivery animal of all time.

Around Halloween, I always love to come up with costumes that perfectly suit the personalities of all 3 tortoises I own. It’s a task that is both tricky and endearing, with an adorable payout for my scrapbook pictures.

The costumes for most common pets are usually available in a large variety, but not so much for tortoises. If you go to major retailers, you’d see a huge selection of cute costumes for all the expected household pets. Browsing the aisles, I see so many types of laughable characters for dogs, cats, guinea pigs, and even some options for lizards. Alas, there is never a designated section for the tortoise lovers of the world.

I suppose it’s understandable that tortoises do not have an overflowing selection of costumes. They are built a little bulky, with scales and a wrinkled face forever meant to be paired with a wizard costume. But tortoises can’t always be wizards every year, and this issue is why there needs to be more development in the tortoise clothing sections of the world.

Usually, I have to buy small sizing in other animals in order to create a costume for my reptiles. If I’m lucky, I will find a small dog costume that can be manipulated into something perfect for a shell. Other times, those slim ferret costumes just don’t do us justice like I originally hope for. The lack of availability for tortoise costumes is truly a problem that should be addressed, and my own torts agree to that wholeheartedly. Last year, I sewed an an evil witch costume for my Redfoot while my Russian tort was the tooth fairy. (Nailed that for sure, just so you know.)

But, there are times when I do not have the resources available to make them a creative and spooky costume from scratch like that! Hunting for convenient costumes can be tricky, but it has to be done.

With all of this in mind, picking out a costume for Socrates was going to be a little harder than I expected. In the past he has been the usual skeleton or cyclops, but I wanted to aim for something a little more tame. In order to really embody the true essence of Halloween costume atire, I wanted Socrates to be passionate about his look.

As a tortoise, Socrates personality is very complex. He is energetic, friendly, and very knowledgeable about the pebbles in our front yard. All day long, he could go on a tangent with the neighbors about which sleeping spot is best on our fuzziest rug. Sock, as I like to call him, strives to make genuine connections with everyone he meets.

Putting a tutu on him or a skeleton costume just wouldn’t hit the mark in the way I wanted. He deserved something cool, trendy, and understandably him.

I ventured out to local pet stores to get some inspiration, and still couldn’t find what I truly wanted. That is, until I thought about the ghastly amount of money I regularly spend at Chewy getting their substrate delivered to my house. Even though they had costumes mainly for dogs and cats, something small had to work!

After a brief moment of searching, I found a dog costume that was an excellent pick for Socrates: a Chewy delivery man. Complete with a hat, fake arms, and a box, this look is ready for adventure!

Socrates spent most of last weekend driving around the big metal box that is the delivery truck. He moved as fast as he could, pacing up and down folk’s driveways to drop off their previous dog treats and Guinea pig beds. It was an important job that he took on, and he figured that this costume was more than a picture opportunity. It was a lifestyle.

If the job gets too tiring, Sock says that he will also settle for being a pumpkin. 🎃