Bonus Costume Day: Sapa Takes Over!

My Momma has been gone for seven straight weekends at the Minnesota Renaissance Festival, and I missed her. I was so lonely. Daddy Noah is great and all, but, I'm a Momma's boy. I was sad.

But today, Momma Tinka said I get to put on a costume. Today is "Bonus Costume Day." I get to see if my "Halloweenie" costume fits.

Momma Tinka puts a shirt on me. I play flop. I resist this un-natural urge to put clothing on. I'm already wearing a fur coat and a collar, Mom! What else do I need? She speaks to me in her gentle voice and I cuddle up next to her. I like having her as my mom. She then puts a big harness over the shirt and makes happy noises. What is happening?

I am both annoyed and adorable, which is a frustrating combination of things. Mom is taking pictures. Can I have my bone now, Momma?

She tells my how she built my costume. "The shirt is from the thrift store, it was meant for a toddler. You know, a tiny human," said Momma Tinka. I'm so glad you have such respect for me, Mom. The harness was designed after Loki's costume from the first Avenger's movie. Is this because I am a trickster dog who eats garbage and kills bunnies and I am super handsome?

"No outfit is complete without accessories," said Momma Tinka. I don't know what they say, but she says since I love the ladies, sniffing Momma's empty wine cup, and licking myself in the blanket, these pins are appropriate for me.

"You're a murder hobo. That's what +1 to Raiding party means," said Momma Tinka. "And that's why you need a tiny sparkly dagger: to murder the rabbits." I don't know about all that, Mom. I seem to have a pretty good kill count with my own teeth and swift paws...I also don't have any thumbs to hold it with, so there's that. Whatever.

"And every Renaissance Festival costume needs a silk. Everyone looks good in a silk scarf. This silver-gold-bronze one will show everyone you are top dog," said Momma Tinka. I didn't need a scarf to prove that, Mom.

"Let's go outside to take pictures!" Momma Tinka said. All I heard was 'outside' and I shot off the couch to the door. I didn't even care that Daddy Noah was mowing the lawn. That didn't bother me one bit.

So what does every good boy do the second they get outside in their nice clothes? That's right! I immediately roll around in the grass. Momma Tinka is not mad. She takes this picture. She laughs and even rubs my tummy. Uhhh, tummy rubs! I am a happy puppy. Momma Tinka gives me the standard two-tummy-tap which means get up and run around. I wanna go sniff, pee, hunt, and murder, but she keeps calling, "Sapa, come here." She has her camera up to take pictures of me. Outside time is MY time, Momma.

She tells me I am handsome, that I'm a little chick-magnet. Great. Can I kill the chicks when they arrive? I've never killed a bird before.

Momma says that it means that women will want to pet me and give me treats. I like the idea of being a 'chick-magnet.' I will be the good boy if it means treats, walkies, and rubs from people. I love all these things.

Momma Tinka said the magic words. "Sapa, you want a treat?" I look right at Momma and step towards her. I was right in the middle of digging up what I thought was a mouse, but I'll take a guaranteed treat in this case. We go back to the inside and she gives me treats and takes my costume off. I am free and naked again. Did she say something about rubs from women? I forgot. I'm gonna go get under a blanket. You can ignore the licking sounds.

And that's my end.