MY SWEET 16 AND HER LOST RING

MY SWEET 16 AND HER LOST RING

The blaring sound of the horn on a bike jolted I and my wife into reality that we’re getting late to leave for our respective places of work yesterday morning. We quickly scrambled for our bags while she asked our 6-years old son to pick up his bag and lunch-pack. In that same vein, she screamed out to the bikeman, “We’re coming!”

I quickly dropped the curtains, locked up the windows, the entrance door and we hurriedly moved towards the gate.

She opened up the gate and in unison we both said “Morning Mr Biodun” and the bikeman replied “Morning sir and ma”

My wife as usual quickly turned defensive, “Mr Biodun, don’t mind them o!” (Pointing to me and my son), “I’ve been set earlier than now, they are the ones that delayed me”

As we were about to mount the bike, she suddenly voiced out “Honey! I miss my ring dearly and really don’t know what to do to the stares and questioning ogles I’ve been getting lately from men and young boys alike”.

This wedding-ring of hers got missing sometime around January 2014 and somewhere in the house. After several futile daily/weekend-searches, she got tired and made up her mind to renew the search in the forth coming holidays.

I smiled and purred a little, “Hhhmm!” “What a question!” “The answer is not farfetched”

“What should I do then?” She asked.

“Whenever you get those funny looks, just take your time to look back at them penetratingly! You then point to Sydney and tell them “He is my son” or “I’m his mamma”.

I chuckled a little but the bike man couldn’t help laughing out aloud!

She smashed me playfully on my back and said “O serious o!”(meaning, you’re not serious). By now, we were all ready on the bike and we zoomed off.

I quickly added “I assure you, they will scamper away in a hurry and will not bother you again”

Now you need to meet my wife. I want to believe God was in a more relaxed atmosphere when He was creating her. I mean there was no rush because He endowed her with all the youthful attributes one can think of. Her beauty alone belies her age! Her slim physique paves way for her amidst teens.

I often tease her that at her present age, she won’t be easily spotted in a secondary school uniform and even when she turns sixty she can still pass for a lady in her mid thirties!.

Much earlier in our marriage, I at times couldn’t help getting scared whenever she comes home and narrates (and she does this often) stories of who “eyed her” or who cornered her, asking to meet and know her. My heartbeat usually skips! And I would be like,” hhhmm, I hope they won’t snatch her off me, considering we are still at “Struggle Junction” and on our way to “Surulere!”

Trust her, she usually reads me well more than a book and with her unique beam, she will tap or hug me and give me that assured look that no one can take her away from me. In fact, on one occasion she said “Dem never born d person!”

Still on my Eve, she has this two sides that I termed- Dr Jekyl and Mr Hyde. She can tidy up like no man’s business, mop the floor all day long and keep our home sparkling clean.

To justify her actions, she usually says “Holy Spirit can come in anytime and He’s mindful of His environment!” I don’t argue afterwards.

Surprisingly! When she now chose to go the opposite side, and this happens whenever she is tired or want to just play lazy, you will be left wondering if she is the same Mrs. Hygienic you use to know!

Imagine shoes left flying in corners; worn clothes on the sitting-room chairs; rulers and pencils beside the cooker or inside the fridge!. I want to believe her ring got missing when she was portraying this her other side!

While getting prepared this wet Thursday morning, she asked if I helped to see one of her dress.

I quickly replied “Oh! I had it on yesterday!” “You can check the laundry”

The very next minute she asked again, “Honey, did you by chance stumble on any of my hair clips?” “I can’t seem to find any on the shelve”

I didn’t even answer her.

She then picked up a red cosmetics bag of hers and rummaged through, and came up with a particular bone –ointment we’ve been looking for in a while.

Suddenly, I remembered her ring and urged her, “Honey why don’t you check to see if your ring is somewhere there”

By now the time was heading for a few minutes to 7:00am and we were getting late. She poured the entire content on the bed and then let out a sharp scream, “Oooooh!!!” “...I can’t believe it”

Lying amongst all her facial gadgets was the 24-carat (Ooops! Sorry!, the white-gold wedding ring I proudly slipped into her finger some 8 years ago in Lagos.

A silence that which you can easily cut through with a knife suddenly came into the room. She looked at me in utmost surprise with her lovely eyes wide-opened!

I looked at our son and asked him, “What is mama expected to say?

My son smiled and said “...thank you”

We now both turned to look at her and you won’t believe what she did!. Expectedly, I was looking forward to a crazy hugging or something...

She just looked at me, stretched out her palm towards her lips and blew me a kiss!

I asked “ Is that all?”

“Yes now!” What were you expecting? Have you forgotten we just got to the 76th day of our 100 days fasting and so none of whatever is in that mind of yours!.

Well, I was left to conclude that now that the lost ring has been found, instead of heeding to my advised phrases of “He is my son” or I’m his mamma” she can now confidently flash her much-loved ring to keep away those prying eyes from her!

I had no choice than to concur with her, picked up my bag and hurriedly left the room to go meet the bike man waiting for us outside the gate.

-McEstus Oshinowo