Sorry about that

i remember the first time it you said it ....

"Sorry about that"

It sounded small , like it didn't mean much . like it could fix everything.

At first I believed you

Every time you disappeared ."sorry about that" . everytime I felt ignored ..."sorry about that" Every time my heart broke a little ...You said the same words.

And I stayed

Not because I was weak ,but because I thought one day your "sorry" would come with change but it never did ! . your apologies became routine ,like song on repeat -familiar bt empty .

And 1 day something in me changed .you said "sorry about that " And for the first time ,it didn't reach my heart, I just look at you and realized ,I deserved more than words.That never turned into action

So I smiled not because I was ok ,but because I was finally done.

At this time the only words I had left were .. "I'm sorry, don't worry too" always sorry sorry and it won't fix anything, everyday you said sorry ,and it was sorry for nothing

Everyday"sorry about that"

im sorry I stayed too long ,and it broke my heart. Words don't fix anything without actions

and after that silence ,not peaceful kind ,The kind that echoes everything you tried to ignore ,you looked at me confused , Maybe for the first time ,you realize i was not coming back this time

No arguments

No begging,

No "let's fix this "

Just distance,I walked away slowly, not because it didn't hurt but because it finally make sense ,All those nights I stayed up thinking I was the problem.all those times I blamed myself for your lake of effort

I see it clearly now ,Love is not supposed to feel like a question.

It isn't supposed to make you doubt your worth and you tought me something not how to love but how to leave

Now when I hear "sorry about that" it doesn't soften me anymore

It reminds me..

Remind s me of vision of myself who accepted less ,who waited for change , That was never coming.But that vision of me ,she is gone

Now I chose peace, Even if it's means walking alone ,And one day you will understand what you Lost ,But by then I will already be somewhere ,I don't have to beg for love

And maybe...

Just maybe one day you will sit in a quiet room

No distractions ,no noise,No one there to comfort you And my absence will finally make sense .You will remember the way I loved you . soft patient,real.

The kind of love that didn't ask for much ... just honest,, just effort.

.It will hit you ,not all at once but slowly .that I was not hard to love you just didn't know how

And I hope that realization doesn't break you but

Teach you

Teaches you that sorry is not bandage for everything , That love needs action , constancy, presence , Because one day you will meet someone who won't stay after empty apologies , someone who will walk away the first time you say "sorry about that" with out meaning it .

And in that moment you will think about me not with regret but with understanding , as for me I stopped replaying our memories like song that refusing to end .I stopped asking questions that had no answers

And I started chosing me . piece by piece I rebuild my heart ,not the same as before , strong,wiser , quieter .Now I don't chase explanations ,I don't wait for closure. Because sometimes closure is realizing you deserve better all along,