How to Get Store-Bought, Hardened Slime out of Carpet

Upon giving my three and a half-year-old daughter her first tub of slime to have loads of supervised fun with, I made it a point to tell her father not to allow her to take it to her room. She has a habit of stashing toys in there for nap time. I won't point any fingers here, but this is his fault.

Four hand-sized stains and numerous smaller ones, nicely smashed into the carpet. And man, that stuff dries quick. It was one of those “yeah I’m not dealing with this right now” moments, so it got to settle in and get comfortable for a few weeks.

Enter a Sunday evening with plenty of laundry to avoid folding—the perfect time to get these crust craters off the floor. I’ve cracked the code on how and I’m sharing my pain and suffering for your gain.

What You'll Need

• A music channel of your choice,
• Goof Off spray,
• Fabuloso Max Clean,
• Curse words,
• An iron,
• Vinegar (I guess),
• Shampoo?
• A butter knife,
• Less than helpful YouTube videos,
• A scrub brush, and
• Lots of patience (like hours).

The carpet scrubber is to suck up all the junk you're about to pour on your floor.

So, first go ahead and watch some how to videos. You’ll quickly realize they all are working with fresh, still moist slime, and you will scoff at their inaccuracy for real-life parents. And they will somehow be all done in five minutes, which is delightfully inaccurate.

Alright, let’s do this. Start by spraying some Goof Off or Goo-Be-Gone on the area and then cover it with something detergent-like. I had some extra strength Fabuloso laying around. Sure, why not. Lather it on. Next, fill up the ole iron and hover it above the stain and steam away. Make sure not to actually make contact. I can’t tell you what exactly would happen, but probably disaster. I should mention that I have no idea the chemical reactions that occur with this formula. (I did say follow at your own risk.)

Now, go at it with the butter knife. I don't know, scrape, stab, do whatever feels right. The solvent and steam help break apart the concreted carpet fibers and rehydrate the slime. You might be able to get a couple small chunks up at this point.

If the YouTube videos taught me anything, it was to use white vinegar. And I don't have white vinegar, but I do have rice vinegar. That's pretty much the same thing, right? Not sure what it actually does, but on it goes. Then a good squeeze of some old shampoo you're no longer using. Scrub it all in with the brush and heat it up again with the steam.

Back to the butter knife. The shampoo should act like a lubricant to the now rehydrated slime, but not without some effort. Don't give up hope. You got this.

I used regular carpet cleaner in my carpet scrubber with water as hot as a I could get it and went over the spots one by one as I finished them. Over and over. If you're lucky, your child will spill a cup of juice on the floor just as you do this to top it all off.

Ta-da! Hopefully after this fun process you've managed to get the stains up. It might not be perfect. As you can see pictured above, not every stain came out 100 percent. I figure I'll give it another shot in six months.

Happy cleaning.