How to Be a Good Person

No one is perfect. Perfect doesn’t exist. But as long as we are constantly striving to be better people, we are doing great.

I, like many others, intend to be a better person, and below are the steps I want to take to make that happen. Some are tiny little reminders, and others are more action-based. But ALL are doable.

1. Apologize when you’ve wronged someone.

If only more people knew how to do this... I can’t tell you how many problems it would alleviate.

Now, don’t go and start over-apologizing (as I’ve been guilty of doing in the past.) But let’s be honest, sometimes you will be the one to screw up. Sometimes, the fender bender is your fault and you know it. Sometimes, you’ll say something that seemed completely harmless, and you will later discover that it hurt someone’s feelings. Sometimes you might even intend to hurt someone in a fit of anger.

I’m a strong believer in how our reactions to certain occurrences are more important than the occurrence itself. You were rude to someone? This doesn’t necessarily mean you are a rude person at all times. Maybe you were having a bad day. But how did you handle it? Did you sincerely apologize to that person? Voila! You are not a terrible person at all! You are a good person who had a terrible day.

But you are able to recognize and acknowledge that you should have behaved better at that moment, and sometimes that is all that people need to hear.

2. Volunteer

Your options are pretty wide open with this one. Food pantries, rescue centers, schools, parks…endless options. Find your thing, your interest, your passion. And roll with it.

3. Call or text someone when you think of them.

Not because you need something. Not out of guilt or obligation. Just because they popped into your head. It makes a world of difference in that person’s day.

4. Photograph a beautiful event.

And share it! More and more people just want to see some good news. Something encouraging, inspiring. Snap a picture of someone being kind. Of a group of teenagers cleaning up a beach. Of a bystander dancing along to a street performance. And let your capture of that moment put a smile on someone’s face. :)

5. Let go of anger.

It’s easier for some than it is for others. The key is thinking through a gut reaction to something. Take a deep breath, and focus on the most effective way to react. What will yelling get you? What will that solve? Do you need to pound something? Work out that frustration at a gym! But in a heated moment, take a minute and step outside if you need to. (Fresh air works wonders in situations like these.) Control your emotions, don’t let them control you. One step at a time.

6. Foster an animal.

Alright now I’m not going to act like this one is easy. Fostering an animal can be an emotional journey once you get attached. But with things like this, it’s important to keep the bigger picture in mind. You’re helping out a fellow creature. You’re taking care of the little guy. You’re providing food and shelter for a being that is in need of those things. And that is certainly a very, very good thing. Keeping that in mind will make it a little easier to part with your new little furry friend.

(But you should definitely take many pictures and videos of your adventures! Chronicle the fond moments to be able to look back on.)

7. Take accountability.

We all make excuses when we’ve messed up. There are 1001 excuses to use when you’re late to work or have to cancel on a friend.

I had a massive headache this morning. You actually didn’t though, did you? You could have made it on time to work perfectly fine, but you simply didn’t.

Sorry pal, I have this assignment that I really need to turn in. Raincheck? Well…you definitely could have easily turned in that assignment sooner. But you didn’t, knowing that would jeopardize this quality time with a friend.

Be a little more honest, that will show the person that you do respect them, and that you just messed up. And that's fine.

8. Pick up trash.

You simply can’t go wrong with this one. You may even inspire others to do the same. And it’s probably the easiest thing on this entire list. A coffee cup on the side of the road? Rather than thinking “that’s not my job”, be a little more positive thinking. “If more people picked up a little trash here and there, imagine the difference it’d make!”

9. Be direct (and respectful.)

Look, way too many people will avoid a subject. They’ll beat around the bush. 9 times out of 10, a situation is sorted out MUCH easier when you are simply direct with the person.

Worried you said something to offend them? Here are your options:

• Toss and turn all night wondering if they are mad at you. Lose sleep over something you didn’t mean. Second-guess all of their words directed at you the following day. Wonder where you could have gone wrong.

• Be upfront and talk to them about it. They probably thought nothing of it.

It’s ridiculously simple to just say what you mean. This isn’t your opportunity to go and be brutally honest in a rude and judgemental sort of way. What we’re talking about here is communicating in a straightforward way to clear something up. Being direct to figure something out and you can both go on about your day, rather than this little thing weighing you down.

10. Surprise a loved one.

IT CAN BE ANYTHING. Bring home their favorite donut one day. Or go the blindfold route and surprise them with a day at their favorite theme park. I’m more of a simple gal. Let’s go for a walk at a park I’ve never been to. Surprise me with my favorite pancakes in the morning. Or, hell, just make a random observation about me that shows you pay attention, that you care.

These are just the things that I am working on. YOU are a whole other person with an entirely different set of strengths, weaknesses, habits, and flaws. If my list has things that apply to you, go for it! If not, I strongly encourage you to make your own.

You can focus more on something like volunteering if you want to make better and more meaningful use of your time. Or you can focus more on internal habits that you want to improve on.

But I’ll let you in on a little secret…

If you set the intention to improve on yourself in ANY way (even if it’s just one thing) then you are ALREADY on your way to becoming a better person.

I tip my hat to you, sir or madam.