Eye Contact

You want an unpopular opinion? Well, I have an unpopular but actually prevalent belief that no one wants to admit.

Stop making eye contact with people.

We live in a society of people that no longer speak to each other face to face or even voice to voice for that matter. We now communicate via Social Media or text.

I've decided that when I see someone, I know at Walmart, I will NOT engage! It could be dangerous. Instead, I will avert eye contact at all costs and hope that they didn't see me. Even if I am pretty sure that we both saw each other, I am also confident we have agreed (in no uncertain terms) that the environment is hostile. So we will avoid each other, and if we pass by one another, we will suddenly become very baffled about where we are and how we got there while reading every box on the self! Whew catastrophe averted.

I will text her when I get home, "Hey girl, saw you at Walmart!" and she will reply "yeah, sorry I didn't say hi, I was in a hurry."

I mean, if I waived, we would feel directly responsible for the others' sense of self-worth and have NO choice but to hear all about one another's lives and how things are going. What an exhausting task, I'd much rather just read about it in their news feeds.

Now, let us suppose that we end up standing in line together (due to a brutal reality that there was no other option). To avoid eye-contact, I will continuously look for China inside my cart because eye-contact could scare her into a conversation, and a conversation could have a devastating result. I mean, we might actually have to care about whats going on with each other's lives and then go and make a mistake like invite the other over. This consequently would mean one of us would need to clean the house and make a nice meal, get all the pretty dishes out and then who is going to do all of those dishes?! (In unison) "not me!" So we just won't get caught up in all that mess!

How do I argue my point you ask?

There was a time I ran into a friend at Walmart. When I refer to "my friend," I am not referring to my real-life friend. I mean one of my Facebook friends. You know the kind you heart all of their videos and pics, and they heart all of yours in return. Yeah, like that kind of friend.

I watched her live Make-up Tutorials all the time, even though I don't really wear make-up. I did this to be supportive of her business adventure, because that is what good social media besties do, right?! So when I saw her at Walmart, I did not want her to see me because I was not having a good day, and on Facebook, I am always positive and energetic and full of life! How in the world could I possibly let her see me like this? And if she wants to pretend that this - messy bun, white t-shirt stained with baby food wearing, one baby tugging on her arm and another secured in his carrier, as she talks to her husband on speaker phone - version of her is not the "real" one then so be it! Who am I to interrupt her artistic process.

We saw each other, there was no doubt. She had NO desire to be recognized, and I didn't want her to know I recognized her either. I'm in a bleached black shirt inside out, toilet paper securely tucked underneath my arm, preparation H and a plunger, and I'm sure everyone knows what's going on at my house and I'd rather not talk about it!

I think she and I spent more time trying to avoid each other then if we just would have waived but, we made eye contact. We felt directly responsible for the self-esteem of the other, so the best way to deal with this was to make it painfully obvious we were ignoring each other.

Finally, we did end up in the same line together despite my efforts to get away as fast as possible, I even managed to run some guys toe over in the process. There we were stuck together, both having a complete panic attack and wanting to melt into the floor. Finally, I broke and said, "Wanna trade?"

She looked at me for a moment contemplating the idea of having diarrhea over her very busy babies, and we both just started laughing hysterically. I didn't have to invite her to dinner, and she didn't ask me to dinner either, our friendship stayed on Facebook and its just a simple reminder that we are human even when we aren't all done up, or magnifying the perfect persona we want the world to see. We were ourselves, and it turned out to be really funny, and that was ok too.

From that day forward, I have tried to be more real and honest about the ugly in my life, even on Social Media.

The real unpopular opinion transpires: Get your face out of your phone and laugh with someone at the grocery store or where ever! Meet people in REAL-LIFE! Be brave and meet real-life people.