Why Kyle Doesn’t Always Smile

On days where I’m driving around the area taking deliveries as I get my life in order, I often go into a state of deep thought about where my life goes from here. It’s hard to say even though my objective is clear, written down and typed on my notes saved on my iPad/iPhone.

Because on days like today, when I serve the community with things to help them thrive and have energy to work And be their best selves, I hold firmly to the steering wheel. Wearing my shades with a stoic looking face, I drive to my next delivery. One after another order, and it doesn’t stop. It continues.

After all, I did choose to start my life over. The life I had before was fine, but it wasn’t good enough and I needed to do better. Thanks to friends i had the pleasure of doing an online business with in the past, i was able to move to Arizona, get a vehicle and experience an RV lifestyle. Nevertheless it was unique and new for me and has helped me gain some insight on living a lifestyle in a camper. Its exactly what I wanted: To be a digital nomad where I could live in different places around the world, and that’s still the plan. Hasn’t changed. However, when it’s time to roll up my sleeve, I don’t smile.

Because my dear friend and his wife knew that I want to have a digital nomad lifestyle.But there was more to it and I’m still a student, learning valuable life skills that wasn’t ever taught to me before i moved here. Those moments when things don’t go quite right, is when I look more serious in the face. It’s when I realize how unpredictable this world actually is and the people who live in it. Or whenever I worry about someone close to me, I frown, and yes it bothers me when that happens. Yes, it causes anxiety, but so does leaving your comfort zone, and experts claim that trying out new things is actually good for us. In the business world, being competitive and cutthroat helps you rise against the rest among your peers. But those aren’t the moments we crack a smile, its after the fact. Nothing is going to come easy and if we truly want something, we must fight to have it.

A soldier doesn’t smile on the battlefield or frontlines but when the white flag of the enemy is waved in the air, and after the war, that same soldier if survived, comes home to a parade to honor their sacrafice and courage during battle, so they wave their hands to the crowd, and don’t crack a smile, but a tear for what they had to endear to be there, at the parade at this very moment. They might smile when they finally hug their wife and children from being on deployment,they may of served their country but their darkest moments wasn’t the by product of serving their nation, it was everything that occurs post war: Going back to their families, friends, and readjusting to civilian life. But the things they seen during war, has changed them forever.

Today what I face in forms of everyday life by rebuilding my life over has it’s challenges and moments of anxiety and frustration. In those moments of frustration and confusion, I often remind myself what will be waiting for me at the end of the tunnel: The type of life that most people can’t live, because of the things they weren’t willing to do. So when I’m running errands as an independent delivery driver or at my day job, of course theres moments where I put on a big smile on my face, because I generally feel happy, when i see my customers as i give them their packages or food, I smile, when I tell jokes to co workers at my day job, I laugh with a smile on my face, when I talk with someone special to me, I put on the biggest smile, but when it’s time to build something that will help achieve dreams, you won’t always see me smile.

There are also days where I only wish for things to progress faster and to accelerate so that it could already come to pass. Of course, it’s impossible for anything great we’d wish to have in our lives to just suddenly be convenient within our reach. Diamonds are made out of pressure, they may look beautiful but it’s the process in which those diamonds were formed that even though was riggerous and ugly, made the stone into a site to enjoy.

The same concept could be applied to what I fasce right now in my life: Consist work with my side hustles and working day jobs that even though are faulty and don’t complete provide fullfillment, will contribute to some of my goals.

Because in order to be happy with something in your life, you need to be stoic about your goals.

That’s why Kyle doesn’t always smile.