WHO AM I?

I find that a very perplexing question. I don’t really know who ‘I’ am because there has never been a time in my life where it has just been ‘Me/Myself/I’.

Being the sixth and final child to two very loving parents in a close-knit family and also living in tight accommodation, acting on anything generally required consideration and thought for the other members of the family.

Alone time to discover yourself wasn’t exactly a practical alternative. The closest I could get to alone time was in my head when reading; I read profusely from a very young age.

At eighteen, I married the man that I am still happy to call my husband. Once again, I suppose because of my upbringing, individual ambitions or goals were not considered. I was one part of a couple; we made joint decisions for the benefit of both.

I am not saying that I didn’t have interests, I had plenty – especially art and craft – and my husband always encouraged and supported me. But there was never a time I wasn’t part of a team – never just me!

Then I became a mother. Now, most other parents I’m sure would understand that once children come on the scene, you tend to live for your children to a large extent. Even after they grow and move on, it can take a while to re-centre yourself and find who you are, as it has changed you so much.

Who am I? I still don’t know – simple as that.

I have spent the last three and a half years mainly focusing on my art. My husband and I had a major upheaval in our lives, which I don’t wish to elaborate on now but suffice it to say – I desperately needed a mental release and my art was it.

My main focus was landscape and seascape painting and here, in Australia, where I live on the Mid North Coast of New South Wales, I am surrounded by magnificent beaches and National Parks and hence an endless supply of inspiration for an artist.

Trying my hand at portrait painting was a challenge but I wanted to try and some weren’t too bad. The family pets got a look-in too.

I could listen to my favourite music, Muse, The Script or even Slim Whitman - my tastes are very eclectic - and with a brush in hand zone out from my troubles and give myself much needed healing time.

I also discovered a very different form of painting called Acrylic Pouring. This was a whole new learning experience and it bought an element of fun into my art. There is so much on the internet that would explain this better than I could but roughly, you mix your paint colours in large quantities and instead of placing the paint carefully on the canvas with a brush, you pour the paints on. There are so many techniques to learn but the unexpected results and unique designs you could achieve each time kept you guessing and it is always mesmerizing watching your artwork develop.

As I was reluctant to share my work on my personal Facebook page and my family wanted to see what I was doing, I was encouraged by them to start a page for my art and creative work and so if you are interested in looking at my work you can find me at MargArt Creative Art. As you can see by the number of 'Likes' it is mainly viewed by my family.

I don’t know how many of you would know what temperatures can get to ’Down Under’ but it can be quite extreme here. One day I sat browsing Facebook and an advertisement caught my eye about a writing challenge on Vocal. I ignored it at first but then, when it was far too hot to paint (the paint was drying on the pallet before I could get it on the canvas) the advertisement popped up again and this time it hooked me. I grabbed pen and paper and with sweat pouring off my face I wrote my first words for a Vocal challenge.

The Little Black Book challenge was the first time I had ever written a story. I had read plenty, for sure, but to write something just felt so liberating. I’m having fun learning as I travel down this new path and the support of fellow writers in the social groups is priceless. I can write anywhere, anytime without disturbing a soul. I must admit too that it takes up a lot less space than my paints and canvases.

I hope to never stop learning new things and enjoy what comes my way. Back to the question – Who Am I?

I call myself an Apprentice Writer, an Amateur Artist, a Wife and Mother and a work in progress and I am the sum of all these parts and I never give up.