The Words That Stay With Us

I was fifteen years old when I decided that I wanted to study mathematics. I can honestly say I wasn't the best but I figured that with help I would get there.

In those days, we chose the subjects we would carry through to the end of school. I wasn't expecting applause, but neither was I expecting what happened next.

The headmistress walked into the classroom, looked at me, and in front of my classmates told me, in effect, that I basically wasn't good enough.

It lasted only a few minutes. Yet decades later, I still hesitate when faced with numbers. Somewhere inside me lives the fifteen year old girl who believed an authority figure knew her limits better than she did.

Years later I met a man who had been at school with my brother. John was always told to go to the back of the class because he was stupid. He wasn't he just needed time and a good teacher, which fortunately he found. He went to university and studied maths and history. He built a successful life He succeeded not because of the label that was placed on him, but in spite of it.

Children believe what adults tell them. A teacher's words can become a voice that echoes for a lifetime.

The best teachers understand this. They don't promise that every child will become a mathematician, a scientist or a writer. They do something far more important. They make children believe that with effort, curiosity and perseverance, they can become the very best version of themselves.

That, to me, is the true mark of a great teacher.

We rarely remember the worksheet or the homework assignment. We remember how a teacher made us feel. Encouraged or defeated. Seen or dismissed. Capable or incapable.

Good teachers don't simply teach a subject. They teach possibility.

As for me I have spent much of my life doubting myself. I question. I replay conversations in my head. Sometimes I even run a scenario through my head, wondering what I should say. I can have an argument before I have even spoken to the person. I wonder whether I made the right decision. Sometime that self-questioning is useful because it keeps me humble and willing to learn. Sometimes it gets in the way.

The other day I walked twenty five kilometres from Orihuela to Murcia. My feet hurt, in fact they were burning, and there were moments when stopping would have been the easier option. But I kept going.

It made me realise something important I may not always have confidence, but I have grit.

There is a difference.

Confidence says,''I know I can do this.''

Grit says, ''I'm going to keep going anyway.''

Perhaps this is why so many underestimate themselves. They mistake self doubt for weakness, when in reality they have quietly been showing up every day, carrying burdens that nobody else sees.

Life isn't won by the loudestor the most certain more often it is won by the people who simply keep trying, putting one foot in front of the other.

But I also know this. When it matters I am the person who turns up, no matter what . I am the person that will see it through, maybe not all at once but I will keep walking.

Maybe I was lucky and found a better teacher along the way or maybe what I found was myself, who was here all along.

I read something today that said I should write for one person. If this is for you then I hope you realise that the world is a better place because you are in it.