The Moment Before He Died...

I met a young man the other day the moment before he died. With my job I come across a lot of dead people. As an EMT, it is our job to call a time of death for people we get called to with obvious signs of death. Obviously, when we get called to a cardiac arrest and the patient is workable we do what we need to, to try and bring the person back to life. But, the other day was just strange. I’ve never met someone the moment before they passed away. He was having shortness of breath – gave him some oxygen and he said it made him feel better while we transported him to the nearest hospital. I have to add that this person had a terminal illness, but wasn’t given a time and wasn’t considered a hospice patient. We were talking and his family was with us, holding his hand for the ride. Upon arriving at the hospital, I transferred care to them, made him comfortable in his hospital bed and told him and his family that I hoped he feels better.

I used the restroom, said a few hello’s to some colleagues and proceeded to finish my report outside in my bus. It wasn’t more than maybe 10 minutes being at the hospital did I see the family come outside crying and making phone calls. I looked at my partner and said, “No way, I think he died. But, he was just talking to us. Let’s go check it out.” We went back in to the ER and sure enough the man we just brought in had passed away. We were shocked as the family cried by his bedside. I couldn’t believe the man who we just brought in, who was talking to us, was no longer of this world. I almost wished to myself that I could have given him a message to tell whoever was on the other side, to somehow show us that we’ll meet our loved ones again. But, it’s understandable that he had a DNR. No one wants to live with or have their loved ones live with the bodily pain of a terminal illness by prolonging the unfortunate pain before the inevitability of everlasting peace.

This is the life of a first responder. We see people come into this world and leave this world - sometimes in the same day. It is by far the most emotional job I have ever experienced. However, it’s a switch - you turn it on and off on command. At some point we become numb to the idea that we see you on probably the worst day of your life. Notice I said “we” become numb. This doesn’t mean that we don’t still have empathy for our patients but rather choose not to feel their pain as they feel it. We have parents, grandparents, siblings, friends too that might have a bad day sometime and we save that emotion for then, if we can. If we even feel that. I’ve been told by my wife that I’ve become cold to certain situations in life because of my job. It happens to be a necessary evil - an occupational hazard.

What’s the point of all this? Well the feeling I had from it was to cherish every moment you have with your loved ones for at any moment, regardless of your health, could be the last one you have with them. How would you want to part with them, on positive or negative terms? Just be conscious about the interactions you have with them.

Positive thoughts and energy towards all…

Rob