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Please Don’t Read This Blog

I Have My Reasons Why, and I’ll Explain

By Jason ProvencioPublished 2 months ago 4 min read
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Photo by Ryoji Iwata on Unsplash

Please don’t read this blog. There are hundreds of thousands of other blogs to choose from. There are more coming soon, just waiting to be published. Every time I refresh my browser, there are brand new articles and blogs to be scrolled through.

So please don’t read this one. It’s nothing special. The title is just average, maybe somewhat boring, and perhaps a bit too short. Sometimes my titles are too long. Meh, titles. Do they really matter that much?

I also sort of rushed to find and use the first decent pic I could find here on Unsplash. I picked it from the first page of choices. Cool, good enough. Who’s actually gonna notice, anyway?

The length of this blog may end up too short. I get a bit bored when I’m writing these sometimes. Perhaps I’m not caffeinated enough first thing in the morning when I’m trying to type up a decent blog to share with you all.

Or maybe I’ll ramble on. Hell, the longer this one ends up being, the more money I’ll make, assuming you make it all the way to its finish. I’m not even sure if I’LL make it all the way to the end. I’m already distracted by another topic I have in my head for the next blog I write about.

I’m sorry if I get off-track. I’m trying to write this while watching Breaking Bad. I love that series. It can get pretty intense, and it’s always entertaining. Did you know that two of my kids graduated from the same high school as Jesse Pinkman? True story.

The wonderfully talented Aaron Paul, a graduate of Centennial High School, my kids’ high school. Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Where was I? Oh yes, again, please don’t read this blog. I doubt many of you have even made it this far. There are so many choices here. I’m certain there are more entertaining ones than this. Most writing pieces don’t get read all the way to the end.

At some point, the person holding their phone becomes bored. They start thinking about better, more thought-provoking, funnier blogs that they could be reading instead of this one. Then the scrolling begins again.

My read ratios seem to average about 30% to 40%. That means three or four people out of ten enjoy my writing enough to finish it to the end. 60% to 70% of you don’t find it interesting enough to not back out and start looking for better things to read.

Such will be the case for this blog. I told you not to read it. If you’re one of the three or four out of ten who didn’t listen to my warning, you’re likely regretting it at this point. I tried to tell you.

So how can I do better on my next blog? What can I do to get more of you to stop scrolling and click on my newest writing piece? There has to be something one can do in order to get five or six out of ten of you to read it until the end.

Well, let’s discuss some things that you might find useful to help your blogs.

First thing first, your title. It has to be noticeable. It shouldn’t be one, two, or three words, that’s too short. Similar to those writing pieces whose titles are a half paragraph or more. That is amateurish. Nobody is going to read that.

“Noticeable title”. What do I mean by that, exactly? Well, it should be something that stands out amongst all of the other titles you’re rapidly scrolling by. When the average reader is likely scrolling through dozens of blogs or articles, why should they stop on yours?

There’s a chance it may be a subject they’re interested in. Maybe it’s a controversial title. Perhaps your wording makes them curious about it. A curse word in a title can grab someone’s attention. A well-placed “fuck” or some variation of it gets noticed, generally speaking.

A title that stands out isn’t enough, all by its little lonesome. You need a brilliant picture that pairs well with your interesting, catchy title. Invest a little extra time for these two things. This will encourage a reader to hit the brakes and open your article.

Get creative with a kick-ass introduction. The idea is to grab a reader’s attention. Then it’s up to you to write well enough to keep their scrolling thumb moving. Spelling, grammar, punctuation, and formatting all count.

Spelling, grammar, punctuation, and formatting matter. Image by Lorenzo Cafaro from Pixabay

Large blocks of text are no good. More people are reading your blogs with a phone than a laptop or PC. Seeing giant, full-page paragraphs screams “BORING”. Aim for three or four sentences per paragraph. Spacing and proper formatting can help keep a reader on your page.

And by sentences, I mean normal-length sentences. Not a giant single sentence that makes up a damn paragraph of your article. Commas should not be used instead of periods. Break that shit up a little bit. Proper formatting is important.

As I’ve mentioned in prior blogs about writing, I’m always aiming for four to six-minute length blogs. These seem to do better than when I am a bit long-winded and they end up around eight to ten minutes. Many people don’t have the attention span for lengthy writing pieces.

I’ve found these components of a solid blog to be helpful in receiving more views, reads, and fans. I feel that I owe it to my followers to put out the best-quality, most entertaining blogs I can that look nice and are easily digestible in length.

Keep your readers’ scrolling thumbs moving by putting out the best product possible in your writing. Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

I’m actually glad you read this blog. Since you didn’t listen and read this to the end, congrats. You’ve won the writer’s prizes. Take these tips, follow my lead, and please DO read my blogs all the way to the bottom of the screen.

I appreciate all of you who rebelled. I admire your stubbornness and perseverance. Honestly, I’d have done the same thing. &:^)

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About the Creator

Jason Provencio

Husband, father, writer, and poet. I love blogging about family, politics, relationships, humor, and writing. Buy me a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/jasonpro9

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  2. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

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Comments (6)

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  • J. Scott Tanner2 months ago

    You tricky bast— er…. Blogger. You got me.

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  • Shadow James2 months ago

    Kept my attention. Good read. Thanks

  • Kendall Defoe2 months ago

    Sorry, I had to break your rule. And I want to read a lot more now. ;)

  • congrats on the title luring me in … 🥂

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