It's a bad day, not a bad life

Just like the usual morning working routine, once you greet all your colleagues in your chat room, whether individual or group, you will expect that a huddle will be called by your superior. Few minutes later, your laptop is ringing and you had no choice but to answer and turn on your video. At the back of your mind, you are hoping and praying that this meeting will turn out well, unlike in the past few days wherein half of your day was "wasted" because your time was focused on listening and jotting down changing instructions and hearing the rants from your higher up on how your team was not delivering the assigned tasks, short of saying your team is ineffective. It's too heavy to bear, given that the team was just established in less than a month and there are piles of tasks to deliver. You know that everyone is doing their best, that aside from the team's tasks, there are other workloads to finish. You wish that you are an octopus, with 8 tentacles, or hands so that you will be able to attend to check emails, conduct meetings with your subordinates, prepare reports, interview applicants, participate in inter department meetings, analyze data, monitor the team's performance and others.

You cannot help but question yourself, am I really ineffective, inefficient and a burden to the team? Especially at times that what you do, write or say was not in accordance with what your superior want, though you only follow instructions. Though it was previously said that you were chosen because of the quality of your work, but it seems it is not happening now.

No one is a perfect employee, you commit mistakes, but a little leniency and understanding will go a long way especially for those who have little background or have no background at all in the tasks they are assigned to. Everyone has birth pains in new tasks, and you are not exempted. Some takes months to be familiar on their work, while some were able to take a grasp immediately. What important is you learn everyday and you give your best daily even extending for extra hours to get the work done.

Quantity of workload is not really an issue, but when you constantly hear the nagging and words of discouragement, it pierces through your brain, heart and soul which results to low self confidence and anxiety. Worst, you are starting to believe that what you hear is all true.

Do we blame the pandemic? Possibly. The lockdowns that limits not only the movement of the people but the opportunity to meet your friends personally, contributes to the stress of work. Unlike before, an after work dinner or booze session during weekends helps you relax and declutter your mind with negative things. It somehow resets your mind and body which drives you to come on the first day of work.

Amidst the pressure and negativity, thanks to your group mates who console anyone who are the center of the bad day. Workmates, whom you considered family, will help you throughout this dilemma. They will serve as your support system in lifting your spirit up and highlighting your strengths, even cracking a joke to make you smile and assuring you that everything will be alright. They will find the silver lining in what's happening and urges you to see the bright side by showing what are the things to be grateful for. Though you are seeing each other physically, the technology still make it happen. Their faces on your videocall, crying with you, laughing with you, smiling with you and virtually sharing food with you made you feel not alone. Emphasizing that your failures at work will not define you as a person because they believe that it is just a bad day and not a bad life.