Inner child healing challenge💪🏼

Note: I’m more busy right now and I try my best but that’s why I’m not 100 percent consistent with this challenge, sorry for that and thank you for understanding

The prompt is from here

“Describe a time in your childhood when you hurt someone’s feelings. What happened?”

Ok, so it’s not a story about someone that I’ve hurt, but a few friends.

There were two twin sisters which were new in our school.

They arrived from abroad (though they were born natives), and they had a birthday.

Now, I got invited. I just didn’t know it. The story is this: my invitation was sent by a text message.

And I’ve lost my phone. In Facebook, my friends hinted to me about the birthday party.

Not directly, so that the twins wouldn’t know. One friend was sarcastic and cynical with her hinting.

I did not understand what was happening and what she was talking about. I was confused.

The birthday occurred and ended. When I found out that I wasn’t invited, or at least that’s what I thought - I was pissed.

I felt hurt and betrayed, abandoned, even, and I blamed my friends for not inviting me (it was a surprise party).

I screamed at them, feeling excluded.

Then I found my phone in a pile of clothings. Saw the invitation. Oh - what a shame… I did got invited.

I bet my friends felt hurt. I don’t remember that part, sadly.

I mean, my memory in general is hazed, it’s like I remember everything and nothing from my past all at the same time. Don’t know how to explain.

But, of course my friends were hurt, I blamed them for something they weren’t to blame for.

The whole thing, though, was more complex. It was a gigantic misunderstanding from both sides. An honest mistake of both parties.

But what else could be done? This is how it was played out. This was the situation.

A misunderstanding, an error. And as humans, we make mistakes. Loads of ‘em.

The other day I watched a video of Timothy Chalamet giving motivational speeches. Pep talks, encouraging us in life.

The thing I wanted to focus in what he said was that failures give juice to our careers. (This is the link to the video)

I reckon that this idea is also relevant to life. That failures don’t wreck you. They build you.

I realized yesterday that the failures should be seen with the same light one views he’s successes. On the same list, the same collection.

Because failures build resilience, courage, consistency. Perseverance.

They can drive you to not say “no” as an answer. That reminds me of something I realized the other day: (it was an interesting day, wasn’t it? 😅)

I witnessed two approaches: the first, someone who’s not willing to work hard. The second, someone who’s willing to work their ass off in order to succeed.

I related to both approaches. Hear me out. At one hand, I’m not willing to grind and grind and fight and fight all the time.

It wears me off. It wears everyone off. Working hard is beautiful, when approached right.

That’s where the other approach sinks in. We need to work hard, but in a flowing, effortless way.

Of course effort is important, but by effortless I mean not forcing the situation, not working too hard.

Entering the flow state/ flow with what life gives you.

That’s where things arrive easily and abundantly. The “not working hard approach” hints on our need to rest, to not work too hard for too many hours.

We don’t need to not work hard, but we need to break it to smaller increments, work in our own sense of timing, and everyone has it differently.

I steered of course yet again, but that’s where my mind took me. To end the journaling log, I’ll say that indeed, honest mistakes like the one with my friends is not entirely the same as failure.

But the themes share something in common: the missing-the-goal part. Be it being a good person, or a successful one. Etc.

But you are a good person even when you make mistakes, a successful person even when you fail. You are successful just by existing. You are kindhearted just because you were created this way.

Flaws are a part of being human. You should not whip yourself for hurting people, for making honest mistakes, because it is part of life.

Plus, self compassion is highly invaluable for that and for every aspect of life. We should celebrate ourselves, there’s no need to repress our needs.