Will My Friend Be Alive?

It was eleven o'clock. The lights in my room were turned off, I was on my laptop, watching videos on YouTube.

I see a notification from the Discord app, I click into it, my friend Saps was calling me.

Normally we never did that, we used to ask each other if the call could be taken.

Regardless, I still answer it.

Silence, I stare at the screen, the indicator of the call's duration slowly moves forward, I say nothing and he says nothing.

He speaks.

His voice had never been like that.

His voice was blanketed by sadness and utter melancholy, I had never heard something that sounded so wistful, so sad.

Hearing the disparity and hopelessness in his voice almost dropped a tear from my right eye.

He says in a slow voice, one that reflected the silent night itself,

"I am going to end my life."

I sit up straight in my bed, he was not joking.

My heart beats faster, I feel it pounding in my chest. I feel air going through my nose, I feel my hand shiver.

I try to speak to him, my voice sticks in my throat. Still, I force it to come out, it wavers.

Suddenly, I do not know what to say.

"What are you speaking about?" I manage to utter, suddenly the cold night becomes hot, and I feel a drop of sweat from my forehead.

"You are the last person I spoke to, friend, you were the one person that was truly worth knowing, goodbye."

He exits the call.

I look at the screen, my profile photo alone.

I feel my heart, I feel tears, I feel sweat.

I am nervous, I am scared, and I am helpless.

I call him again, he does not answer, and I feel my body shaking.

I cancel the call and call him again, I do it again, still, no answer.

I text him, I tell him to stop, I send messages after messages, I do not know if he has seen those or not.

I know that trying to contact him is futile.

I feel a wave of fear in my chest. Everything feels cold, yet I am still sweating.

I open my door and rush out.

I go to my brother's room, I push it so hard that the lock breaks and the door opens.

He was scrolling through his phone.

He looks at me in shock, bewildered and even afraid.

"We are going to StreetLocks." I say to him.

He stands up, "What happened?" he says.

I could not wait, I took the backup key for our mother's car that he had, and storm out.

I run downstairs, his life depended on it.

I try to enter the car, but my brother held me.

"Have you gone mad?" he says, with exasperation.

I kick him where it hurts.

He lets out a howl of pain.

I enter the car, and drive.

I do not have a license, I am not a good driver. But none of that matters, it means below nothing right now.

I speed up, now knowing what speed I am driving at.

The car hits a wall in a turning, I still move.

I see his home, I leave the car in haste, and rush.

The door was locked, I start hitting it like a madman, I shout, I scream.

I pull the door with all my force, nervousness and panic fueled my strength.

I fell backwards, the door came with me.

I run upstairs to his room and try to open the door, it was locked.

I bang at it, almost crying.

His father, mother and elder sister all come to me.

They probably saw I was a child, and probably recognized me as well.

"What are you doing here, how did you enter?" his father asks me.

I feel my lungs out of air, but still I speak.

"He called me and said he would end himself," I said.

The expression they had turned from nervous curiosity to fear.

His mother and elder sister start crying, screaming, pleading him to open the door and they hit it franatically.

His dad rushes somewhere, I do not know what to do.

His dad came back with another key and unlocked the door.

I barge into the room.

….

….

….

I see the color red, all over the bed, all over the floor.

I see him, with the knife still in his hands, sleeping over the pool.

I suddenly do not hear anything, I feel dizzy, and my knees fall to the ground.

I collapse, I feel the carpet.

I can barely see his face and the sound of cries before my eyes are closed.