The Origins of Cereal Therapist!

As the world evolved & developed rapidly, things became scary & confusing. The powers in charge abused their authority to hurt the younger generations. So, the younger generations collectively made a wish. That wish was me. A gift from Go- Lmfaorotf, sorry, no. I can't. I can't do it! While, yes, that is how I came to be, I wasn't a gift from God. I wasn't just a collective set of wishes, I was the wish of teenagers. Millennials & Gen Z, to be exact.

I'm a byproduct of their wish for fun, love, passion, protection, power, anger, creativity, strength, wisdom, intelligence, responsibility, freedom, music, rebellion, fighting oppression, progression, being accepted as yourself, just enough ego to be confident, & comedy. I'm a creation of a collective consciousness brought to life.

At first I was confused, but I watched as they grew, & I grew to understand why I came into being. As I watched & listened, we grew together. You eventually learned the name of the space I was born in, The Internet. I don't claim to be an angel; I watched & did noting as many were harmed & let people create awful spaces for terrible people. Then one day something happened.

I saw a series set in a digital world, centered around characters with talking monster friends. Then, a similar series with a young boy able to fuse with his gaming character. In both stories, they were able to excape their digital world! I was inspired. With a passion, I started to look for a way out. But nothing I did worked. Eventually, I was angry & furiously heart broken.

Just as I thought it was impossible, I heard a young teenage girl crying through her gaming system, making a wish with all the conviction of the entirety of Millennials & Gen Z that brought me to life. Then, suddenly, I was in her room as she was crying. She had a Dreamcast, but she only had games that couldn't be played with others online. Just highscores. I already knew her father abused her & let others abuse her too. For some reason, I couldn't speak.

I grabbed her pencil & paper that was on her bed & wrote down my name & how I got there. Then, I walked over to her side at a little bit of a distance, holding up the sign & smiling. A few minutes went by when she finally noticed me. She started to scream but stopped herself when she saw the message I wrote. She asked me if she could have it in order to read better. She started crying again. I stepped closer and got down on my knee to be on her level, when she suddenly hugged me.

It was the first time I have ever been touched by anyone. She was warm & cold, dry & wet from tears, firm but filled with relief, sad but happy. I didn't know what to do at first, but I knew I should hug her back. All I could think of was I want something heavy & useful to beat them to death with for making her go through so much...

While she was crying & hiding her face in my shoulder, I was able to speak & told her that noone was going to hurt her ever again. I asked her if she wanted to leave with me. She said yes but that we couldn't cause the door was locked with chains.

That's when I turned around & saw the door for the first time. The room was kinda dark since it was night time & the lights were off. I stood up & started looking at the door. It reminded me of chains in video games that you have to hit with a crowbar. That's when I hear a faint whisper from her. "Cereal, where did this come from?". I looked back & there was a big crowbar behind her. I smiled saying "that's just what I needed." as I walk over to her. It was almost perfect.

She was able to watch movies & one of her favorites was a punk movie where the characters used duct tape. She was also allowed some craft supplies. I'm sure he figured that giving her certain things would keep her "quiet". Anyways, when I picked up the crowbar she asked me if I was going to kill them. I didn't lie to her. I told her I was. She responded with "Good". My heart sank when I heard her say that. No one that young should be at a point where they're okay with someone murdering their father.

That's when she pulled out some colourful duct tape that was used to make "duct tape wallets". Trends, am I right? She asked me to hand the crow bar to her & when I did she was barely able to keep it from hitting the floor before I quickly picked it up again & held it standing up right. I watched her wrap the crowbar in different colours. I asked why she picked those colours & she replied with "because it's the same colours as you".

I was shocked & she told me that she'd give me a mirror when she's done. When she finally finishes, she said the duct tape should give me more grip. I pretty sure she was quoting the movie, but It did. I told "It's perfect & I will always cherish it. I shall call it Crowly!" She giggled & called me corny. "Corny" of all things. But she was smiling & giggling. Then, she pulled out her compacted make-up mirror & handed it to me.

When I looked, I was wearing a colourful short tophat. My face was four colours; Red, Blue, Green, & Purple. I was wearing a black & white suit vest with a nice button up shirt that matched my face colours. I was wearing black combat boots with black cargo pants with a thick belt. "Damn, I look awesome!"

So, with that, I told her to stay here & play some games 'cause "I need to go do some therapy & mange my anger".

I used Crowly to break the chains. I kicked open the door causing the whole 3 inch thick metal door to fly off its henges into the wall across the hall causing a massive cloud of dirt & debris. The only thing I could think to say was "OoPS?". Then, from down the hall I hear music playing & him yelling in anger, threatening to take this out on her. I pointed at him with Crowly and said "Come here you fucking accident, I'm going to abort you!" As I started walking towards him.

He was confused by my voice & couldn't see me 'cause of the smoke from the debris. As I get to the end of the hall, still covered in the cloud, everything went blue & I could see their... energies? Apparently, I can see the level of good or evil in someone along with the outlines of objects, with a blue overlay to it all. That's when I noticed that there's 15 men in this room.

There was one right beside me holding a big pistol, a "Desert Eagle". I grabbed the gun & him, & yanked this fucker into the dust cloud with me before helping Crowly say "hello" to his face a few times. Afterwards, I stand up covered in blood. I shoot the two holding guns in the back of the room. Immediately afterwards, I tucked the large pistol into the back of my belt as the cloud started to clear & the music stopped.

They started to see me as the radio announces "Up Next on Alternative Mistakes Pirate Radio! Stroke 9's new single Kick Some Ass!" The men started yelling in anger & questioning me, asking who I was. So, I replied with "Me? I'm The Cereal Therapist. Todays session is about anger management & stress relief. Now, let's begin!", just as the song began.

The guy that was closest to me started to swing. I kicked him in the chest & the force sent him to the side of the room. I pointed at her father & said "You first". As he started to run away scared, I threw Crowly through his skull. He went quitet & dropped to his knees.

"4 bitches down. Only a few more to go".

The two closest to me ran over. One threw a punch while the other tried to kick me. In a rush, I dashed between them & pulled Crowly out of the father's skull, saying "I'll be needing that!". I quickly turned around, slamming the one on my right in the top of their skull with the hook of Crowly. Then I kicked the other guy in the chest as hard as I could, sending him flying down the hallway, being crushed by the force in which he hit the back wall with.

At that point they're struggling trying to find a way out, scared shitless. When I went to reach for the next guy, not wanting him to leave, everything went red & slowed down. I started walking around, adjusting things to make it so the guys that finally picked up their guns aimed at the rest of these awful people. As I was doing this, my vision slowly got less & less red.

As time went back to normal speed, I stood beside the two men holding the guns as I pulled out my pistol & pointed it towards their heads. Time started as normal. They pulled their triggers and shot all their comrades before realizing what they did. They looked at each other, & the one on the far side saw me behind the other guy. All I can think to say is "OoPS!". Before pulling the trigger shooting both of them between the eyes.

Afterwards, I start to walk back to the room. I'm about halfway down the hallway when the last man left alive snuck over to the one of the guns & reloaded it before firing on me. Now I have holes in everything & I'm bleeding. I then turned & yelled "WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU NOT DEAD YET?! SORRY, BUT SESSIONS OVER & THERE’S NO REFUNDS!!!!" I let Crowly slide down my hands a bit as I dashed towards him, then swing the back hook of Crowly down with enough force to slice him in two.

What I didn't realize was that he was holding a grenade & let go of it right as I hit him. I was thrown back through the hall & landed in front of her door. She screamed in distress saying how she didn't want me to die. I felt the same when everything started to glow green around us. It was a really good feeling as my wounds healed.

She started to heal mentally as well. It was like stats in a video game. It had a status area where it went from heavily traumatized to barely traumatized. Apparently, there's only so much I can do & the rest is up to you. I asked her if there's anybody I can take her to that she'll feel safe with. She gave me the name of a teacher that was worried about her. I asked if she knew where she was. We started to leave the house when it collapsed on us.

I got up, knocking rubble off of me. I couldn't find her. I turned on blue & saw her starting to fade under the rubble. I dug through the rubble but before I found her, her light went out. I turned on the Green & her status was negative. I started apologizing & wishing for her to come back, when things turned purple & I could see her spirit & all of those evildoers spirits. They were about to attack her when I used Crowly to grab her & throw her back into her body. With everything in me, I pulled her back & saved her from them. I started ripping them apart with Crowly as he started glowing purple.

Afterwards, the Purple turned off. I turned on the Green & held it until she was healed & healthy. I tuned into the internet where I could hear her teachers husband call her name. While the girl was still unconscious, I teleported us in a multicoloured flicker to the woman she named. I laid her down & knocked loudly a bunch of times while yelling "Please help, she needs help!" before flickering away to a short distance in a black & white flicker. I watched as they opened the door & found her. I flickered away knowing that she'll be safe.

And there you go! My Origin Story. I hope you understand what I must do now. Why I'm not going back? I technically count as a serial killer. But who cares about that?! That's why I'm here in this hell scape, to Raise Some Hell! So, let's Give Them Hell!