Ominous Uncertainty

It was bitter, cold, and I was left alone. The atmosphere around me had teeth hidden behind a thick grey blanket that lay atop the grave below me. I’m swaying, floating and I can’t shake the feeling that hands will come up and drag me into the abyss with the rest that sleep here. Desperately, I beckon for help but only echoes find me. I really am alone out here in this. How did I get to this state? I don’t know. I awoke to this gloom, this icy tomb, as if transported against my will. I’ve been here too long, though, my hands and feet feel foreign, but they need to take me above to where I can feel what lies beneath me, and not this ominous uncertainty.

Before this I was laughing, playing. The sun was vibrant above, exposed and brilliant… warm. Everything was warm. The embrace of my friends, my family, my child. Where were they now? We had come to this beach so full of life to celebrate. I had finally broken free from my prison, my abusive ex. I was free, I was looking forward to a new life with my beloved child. “You deserve this, you went through hell with--”

I heard my friend’s voice faintly.

I hear my name called through the fog, then silence.

Behind me, a presence made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. I looked back but nothing was there. Bubbles came up from the deep, I couldn't see through the surface. I kept my eyes locked below until a darkness began to grow darker than the black it was before. My instincts screamed at me to swim for my life.

The unknown force was at my toes, I could feel it with every kick. I couldn’t see where I was going and I seemed to be swimming endlessly, pursued and grasped at. I could feel what was like millions of fingers trying to grab my feet, trying to stop me, but it was unnervingly quiet! Not even a splash could be heard. Nothing. It was a threatening silence, as if it was trying to absorb me into it.

It stopped.

I felt wet sand and kelp below me and kept going. My hands came to life clawing at the sand, feeling each grain. I came to my knees, it was still cold, the sand felt like tiny shards of ice. On my feet I looked around and the fog lifted to reveal more grey. The air was still, stale, lifeless.

I heard my name again.

My child’s voice, desperate and choked with tears.

My heart broke hearing that little voice so sad, I called out as loudly as I could. I kept calling out. My voice stopped short, it didn’t carry, it didn’t echo. The voices calling me ceased. I started running; anywhere, everywhere, screaming. I pleaded with any god or entity to let me be heard, let me be found.

The cold came back in full. The air bit me viciously and my hands left me again. A deep silence fell again, except for a humming, soft and distant. I searched with my eyes for anything. There was nothing but grey. I was lost.

The visage of my loved ones phased in and out around me, passing me, distracted by some apparent goal. I reached out feeling emptiness and cold. I fell to my knees sobbing, my hands returning to feel the unforgiving sand below. I felt small hands on mine and looked up to see my child gazing at me lovingly, then the smile fell and tears followed. The little hands gripped mine in the silent sobbing, tears falling on the sand, the water slowly came up to swallow the sand and bring me under. I felt more hands grip mine, my legs and feet. I saw the shadow come toward me as the water rose above me.

I heard my name one last time.