In Any Other Skin

You know that voice, the one that softly whispers on occasion from the caverns deep in the back of your head? Well, at that moment in my life, I heard them and mine, were screaming.

I don't know what it is about my need for adrenaline, but it has always been an issue for me, a force to be reckoned with. For me, fear seemed to have no definition, it was just a word people used as an excuse not to...not to try, not to push, not to discover what might be. Especially if it was something that was meant to be kept. Kept hidden, kept secret, kept...anyway...

I have always been the life of the party, any party. I mean, I made it my life's mission to be the one that everyone wanted to be around. And I was good at it, an expert in persuasion. I could have them, anyone, eating out of the palm of my hands and begging for more. I was, extraordinary.

I know how that makes me sound, conceited, arrogant, egotistical. I've even been labeled as being narcissistic. Maybe so, but that didn't change the fact that I was the one in charge, that was until November 3, 2023 at precisely 2:33am.

No, that was the day that everything changed.

She was the ying to my yang, the up to my down. Believe me, she knew how to push all the buttons and she shamelessly challenged all the rules, setting fire to the establishment, like an angel dressed in human kinds finest skin. So of course, I knew that no matter what, she had to be mine.

"The amount of good things in your life is solely dependant on your ability to notice them."

That was the first thing she ever said to me, and the very last thing I remember hearing the voices say before I blacked out.

Her hands gently caressed my shoulders, slowly sliding up around my neck, tighter and tighter and as the warmth of her breath covered my ear as she whispered....

"Cut me open and sleep inside."

Jolted awake, I gasped, surprised to find myself sitting on a moving train, in a puddle of my own sweat. A strange woman sharing the railcar with me, quickly exited, and approached the attendant, pointing back at me anxiously asking to be moved to another car.

Unbothered, I glanced out the window into the mist, with no idea where I was, how I got here or where I was heading. As I set back into my seat, a half torn ticket fell from my coat pocket onto the floor. I sit and stared at the foreign words, confused at the address on the stub, Pripyat, Ukraine. "What the hell?" I mumbled, as the conductor stepped into the door.

"це твоя зупинка" he called, handing me a folded piece of paper, urging me to get my things.

"Wait, what? I, I can't understand what you are saying." He continued to push me towards the exit, grabbing a leather bag from the closet and repeating what he'd said earlier, but more forcefully, "це твоя зупинка, це твоя зупинка!"

A young, ragged looking boy that was standing in the aisle intervened in broken english, "he is trying to tell you that this is your stop, you need to get off the train."

Hey, wait," I hollered after the boy, as he disappeared into the crowd, "I don't know where I am, I don't know how I got here, wait, stop, help!"

With that, the conductor shoved me off of the train and I fell face first onto the platform. Dazed, I slowly gathered my composure and made my way into the nearly abandoned station, swiping the blood from my nose onto the torn sleeve of my jacket. Confused and now feeling a bit unsure, I waited for the frail man in the red jacket to notice me, as he does, his eyes roll. "Чим я можу вам допомогти?"

I stare at him in a way that conveys that I obviously didn't speak Ukrainian. "How may I help you?" he asked, using every consonant in the english alphabet.

"Uh, yeah... actually, I don't really know, uh, I don't know how I got here or how I got on that train or even in this country..." and as I rambled on he slowly plucked the now bloody, piece of paper from my shirt pocket. "приречені." Before I could ask him what that meant, he repeated in english, the doomed and pointed to an old yellow taxi that sat idling in a cloud of its own exhaust, just outside the unhinged door.

I made my way to the curb and climbed into the vintage taxi only to find three strange men, all holding a similar folded piece of paper. Each one wearing the same confused look as I, and all speaking different languages.

By the time the taxi came to a stop, we had discovered a translating app that had us all communicating and oddly enough, on the same page. John was a contractor from Honduras, Stephan was a diamond dealer from Italy, Michael was a banker from Tel Aviv and I, was currently at the top of the FBI's most wanted list for burglary. We all had a history of living on the gray side the law.

Collectively, we were able to decipher the notes on the folded papers that gave detailed instructions to an entrance of an old abandoned subway tunnel. Apparently, the love of my life had been busy curating the four of us for some unknown reason.

The taxi driver hurried us out at the mouth of the dilapidated structure and before we were able to cover the bill, he sped off, without a word.

"That was strange," I said, looking at the others for some reassurance and finding none. "guys, if I didn't know any better, and I don't, I'd say we're in some kind of trouble."

A few moments later we heard a series of beeping sounds coming from deep inside the tunnel. Stephan reached down and picked up a gold coin, looking up, he pointed out a red flashing light that seemed to be bidding us to enter. We hesitated at first, but curiosity over ruled our fears and we followed the flashing dot into the darkness.

Michael's phone began to buzz and we stood huddling together in the soft light, trying to read the vague text. It was from her. All it said was, "avoid the drone, more to come."

"How did you all meet her?" I asked.

"Actually, we never did," Stephan said, "We were lured here with a text promising easy money and a chance to escape our torrid pasts." Michael and John's heads nodded in agreement. Looking at the old coin in his hand, he said, "I came to take a stab at starting over, but what kind of money could be here, in the deserted, ghost tunnels of Pripyat, Ukraine?"

As he said the words, a soft voice began to whisper, echoing down the hollow corridor.

чекає скарб, bходьте на свій страх і ризик

Running the words through the translator, our eyes broadened as it repeated, "treasure awaits, enter at your own risk." Stephan pocketed the coin and turned his flashlight forward, "well, shall we?" he said, leading the way.

A haunting sound of a train whistle floated, lingering like a warning in the air, still, without thought, we all willingly jumped down onto the tracks. Stephan's phone began to flicker, "My battery is about to die, how does the rest of yours look?" he asked, nervously. As the light on his phone faded, we stood in the darkness, none of us able to see.

We could feel a presence around us but it was so dark we couldn't make out shapes. I fumbled around and found a pocket knife in the jacket I was wearing, I couldn't remember where I had gotten it from, but I pulled it out and began to wave it around in front of me, at the sounds that seemed to be surrounding us.

"Drones, they're everywhere, " I mumbled nervously, "they are tracking and spying on us. Relaying everything we are doing and every bit of fortune we might find. Heads up guys, I think we are in for the fight of our lives." We'd come so far and I was now bound and determined that no one was taking this from me, no-one

Stephan let out a scream that startled me, causing me to lunge forward, shoving the blade with all of my strength into the unknown stranger that was chasing us. A sharp pain ran across the palm of my hands followed by a wet and warm sensation. Jonathon grabbed my hands and gasped, groaning a warning, he stammered, breathing heavily into my face, so close our mouths nearly touched, "I've been stabbed." and he fell hard, onto my feet. Before I could help him I was startled by the touch of a hand on my shoulder. Instinctively I whipped the blade around to protect us from behind, Michael's phone lit up unexpectedly, but as the light exposed his face, I could see he had been taken over, possessed by the entity in the tunnel, so I swiftly ran the blade across his neck, to release the demon that had taken over his body. He dropped his phone as he fell limp on the ground.

I was able to grab his phone and use the remaining light to make my way back to the platform. And that is when I saw her her, her body was so ravaged that I barely recognized her face, but it was her. I didn't have time to react, sensing that the moaning behind me was getting louder and I had to be ready to fight for my life. The voices and footsteps were growing louder and closer and I struggled to think, I hit my head hard with my fists grasping for a way to get out of this alive. Then, it dawned on me...

As she lay there, broken on the floor, I remembered the words she'd whispered into my ear, from my dream on the train.

"Cut me open and sleep inside."

I realized that the only chance I had to survive was laying there, broken on the platform in front of me. So, I quickly pulled the knife protruding from the wound in Jonathon's chest and our passports from Stephan's severed hand and in one swift move, I slit her open and quickly slid myself inside her body as a cover, I smelled her flesh and tasted the copper as it seeped into my skin, making us one. The drone that had been tracking our movements buzzed just inches above my ears, hovering suspiciously over the four of us laying there, presumably dead. After a final scan it beeped a code and simply disappeared into the darkness.

I laid there for a moment, feeling her warmth, knowing that in the end, she had intended to save me all along.

I knew she loved me.

A small wooden door creaked open sending a cool breeze over my partially exposed body. My mind began to race as I held my breath, remaining perfectly still, so not to give myself away. I could hear a voice softly whispering, and as I strained, I could swear it was saying my name. I could almost feel the weight of the footsteps as they got closer to where I was.

The light from the open door cast a shadow that now stood directly over me. I gripped the bloody blade in my hand, ready to eliminate whatever threat stood in my way of survival. As I lunged from the torn and broken body of my love and was instantly apprehended by four men dressed in white. One of them jabbed a needle into my neck and I fell limp onto the floor.

When I awoke I was strapped tightly to a table, it was elevated slightly, just enough to allow me to see them, a group of at least twelve people observing me from behind the glass. I felt a warm liquid rush into my arm as the man standing next to me said, "if there is anyone that would like to speak before we proceed, now is the time." A beautiful boy with my face stood next to Michael in the back of the room, his features were soft and gentle. Tears ran down his wet cheeks and as he spoke his lips quivered.

"I forgive you, father. I know that nothing will ever bring her back, but I will find peace in the fact that she loved you. And if she found enough grace for you, then I will too. Goodbye and may God save your soul."

Michael stood and tugged on his white jacket, he appeared angry as he spoke, "She worked with you for years, certain that you would find help here. She had us all convinced that you were worthy of being saved, that you meant no harm to others, instead, you slaughtered her and the Drs. determined to help free you from the evil that consumes you. Today though it all ends. Today, you will finally answer for your demons. Today the world will begin to heal from the pain you've inflicted."

The next thing I remember was a small pinch, and I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep. My eyes fluttered slightly and I swear that I saw her face and I heard her sweet voice calling to me

"The amount of good things in your life is solely dependant on your ability to notice them."

I sensed the devil inside me smile, just before it went dark.