How to Survive the Apocalypse

For years, I have been reading and writing zombie apocalypse stories and read up on other types of apocalypses. Then it hit me... HOW DO YOU SURVIVE THE APOCALYPSE?!

I decided to do some research and offer some tips, tricks, and ideas to help with the apocalypse and create a series of different ways to survive. Warning, I an no expert and no survivalist. So take everything I give to you with a few grains of salt and sugar. OK! Let's get started!

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Rules:

Rule 1: Hospitals and School will ALWAYS become the first to become overrun. Try to avoid them at all times.

Rule 2: Do research! Go to the news, TV, other people, kill some zombies, trap one, and do some tests like poke it, test its sight, test its sound, but be safe! Also, watch some zombie TV shows and see what happens.

Rule 3: PLAN BEFORE! Do some planning before the apocalypse! Organize before they rise!

Rule 4: Use protective clothing and BURN the bodies, even if you have to bury them later!

Rule 5: Canned Food! They last longer than fresh food.

Rule 6: Group up! But keep it small. Grouping means an extra set of eyes to watch your back. Limit it to 10 at most!

Rule 7: Always be prepared to move! Never get attached to a place! It won't last!

Rule 8: Quiet weapons! Blades and blunt objects are quiet and don't need to be reloaded.

Rule 9: Only use guns when you have to! They're loud, they're deadly, and they need to be reloaded. Too much time!

Rule 10: Have backup plans. At least one but it's better to have two or three.

Rule 11: Speed and strength are the best! Build it up!

Rule 12: CONSERVE ENERGY! The dead don't need it, you do!

Rule 13: Fight only when you have to! You are not a chicken or a wimp to run. You're alive!

Rule 14: Stealing isn't illegal! Murder isn't illegal! Be careful! You never know what could happen!

Rule 15: Don't be a hero. Save someone only if you can! Don't do it if you can't!

Rule 16: Accept the fact that you will die! It's up to you when that would happen!

Rule 17: If you are bit... you're already dead. Tell your group and don't try to "Tough it out!" You are the difference between them mourning your death, and you turning them into death rising!

Rule 18: Knock before you enter. Not to be polite, but to see if zombies are in there.

Rule 19: Travel light!

Rule 20: Keep calm!

Rule 21: Find entertainment. You are gonna lose your mind if you don't have some type of entertainment.

Rule 22: Gather supplies whenever you can. Never run low!

Rule 23: Stay above ground! Sewers only have one way out!

Rule 24: As soon as the apocalypse is confirmed, fill your bathtub and sinks with water. Lack of water will kill you! And you'll smell!

Rule 25: Keep your hair short and your clothes tight. Zombies will grab you!

Rule 26: Always check for car alarms!

Rule 27: Learn to siphon gas! Poke a hole in the bottom of the gas tank!

Rule 28: Never pick a fight unless it's worth it! Injuries will cost dearly!

Rule 29: Fire is a big no! If you MUST, must have a fire, keep the flames low!

Rule 30: Learn to eat GROSS! Rotten fruit, carcasses, anything you can get your hands on!

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Tips

Tip 1: Old Spice or essential oils in a bandanna can help with the smell!

Tip 2: Zombies can't swim. Try going on a boat and sailing out! That's my plan! And you can always go fishing and get some seaweed for food.

Tip 3: PARACORD! So many uses. So helpful!

Tip 4: DUCT TAPE! Creates useful stuff, helps for a strong stick

Tip 5: Learn how to make traps for both zombies and animals.

Tip 6: 60 uses for a bandanna!

Tip 7: Learn other survival tips! They will save your life!

Tip 8: Don't leave your house for three or four days. Everything will calm down after that and you can always wait it out.

Tip 9: Drive slow. Never know when a psycho is speeding down the road and can cut you off!

Tip 10: Slugs, ants, cockroaches, termites, grasshoppers, and grubs are edible! Suck it up and eat it!

Tip 11: Tinder is around the side of pencil lead, the size of your hand stretched or bigger, and enough to fill a circle in your hands. Kindling is no thicker than your thumb, as long as the tip of your finger to the elbow, and can fill in your arms. Fuel is wrist thick, as long as your whole arm, and piled up to your knee!

Tip 12: Foods that can regrow from scraps: onions, carrots, pineapples, scallops, potato, lettuce, celery, garlic, and more.

Tip 13: You can gather water from trees and the atmosphere!

Tip 14: Once your pet is dead... eat them! Let them help you one more time.

Tip 15: Always carry a good multi-tool.

Tip 16: Quit smoking, drinking, drugs... They hold you down.

Tip 17: Wipe mud over your skin to protect against mosquitoes.

Tip 18: Eating something before you sleep helps insides get warmer.

Tip 19: Become a good shot: Hunting, killing, all the same.

Tip 20: Become less dependent: modern day uses, out the window!

Tip 21: Find a way to generate your own electricity.

Tip 22: Stay positive! Don't let your brain keep you down. It could kill you!

Tip 23: Know your survival skills.

Tip 24: Choose a good hideout.

Tip 25: Plan FAR ahead.

Tip 26: Get out of the city and into the woods.

Tip 27: Watch out for Crazies!

Tip 28: Zombies are the least of your worries. Humans are just as deadly.

Tip 29: Imitate zombies, both acting and smell!

Tip 30: Create normalcy. The world has changed—make sure you do, too.