How to Successfully Summon a Demon

“OK, so… the first time I fucked up, but I understand what I did wrong. I re-watched the videos; I re-read the notes, and I know what to do now. Tonight... I’m going to summon a demon.”

The eyes staring at the video camera had given in to madness; Kevin McCaffrey had free-fallen into a vast web of darkness, malevolent forces, and violence, and had become obsessed with claiming his prize.

Time spent in his obsession had not been kind: his unwashed clothes hung on his emaciated frame; his hair and beard were unkempt and matted; his eyes, dark and sunken, stood staring, standing on the precipice of insanity, ready to fall.

He was filming in the basement of an abandoned house in an abandoned neighborhood in central America, with a simple video camera on a tripod. A few well-placed candles allowed the dank room to be visible.

The room was in shambles. Papers were everywhere. He had graffitied angelic wardings on the walls, meant to contain and subdue the summoned demon, restraining it from its full potential. A chair was in the center of the room, another warding encircling it. A young woman, bound with ropes and gagged, sat there. She was breathing in short, shallow gasps, crying and terrified.

Kevin began pacing the room, thinking out loud. “Yeah, so the thing I did wrong was having the sacrifice passed out and drugged. I mistranslated the text. Stupid me!”

He punched himself several times in the face to punish himself for being so idiotic and getting someone killed for naught. The woman in the chair screamed and said something that was muffled through her gag, and started sobbing.

“Yeah, but it’s OK, it’s OK,” he muttered to himself, still pacing the room, rubbing his beaten temple. “I learned my lesson and now it will be perfect.”

His mind snapped back to the task at hand, facing the camera and pointing to the woman. “As you can see, this one is awake, so everything should go the way it’s supposed to.”

He walked to a fold-out table to the right of the camera (mostly out of view) and retrieved an ornately decorated dagger.

“I had to kill a fucking bishop in San Antonio to get this. The legend of this blade is that it contains a piece of the true cross in the handle, and was blessed by St. Peter himself.”

He chuckled as he walked behind the woman. “I don’t know her name, and I don’t care. The only thing that matters is that she is about to change the course of human history. I’m about to prove beyond a doubt that angels and demons exist, and that demons can be controlled.”

Kevin lifted the woman’s head back. She screamed as he slid the knife across her throat. Her blood poured down, body shaking as he tried his best to keep her still. He stared at her while she bled out, an excited smile covering his face.

When he was sure she was dead, he tenderly lowered her head, patting it in thanks for her contribution.

He scurried back to the table, returning the blade and trading it for what appeared to be a perverted version of a bible.

He addressed the camera. “This is the ‘Diaboli Compendium,' or ‘The Devil’s Compendium.’ It is rumored to be bound in human skin, and is used for some pages, even. It was allegedly written in the second century, and it was to be used in the end times, to capture and contain the denizens of Satan’s army.”

He opened the book and began combing through the pages, finding the right one. He looked at the dead woman and spoke to the camera:

“It took three years to translate just this page, which I’m fairly confident is translated correctly. I had help with this page; when I bought it from a black market trader in Istanbul, he pointed this page out to me. I knew it was important. Of the 10 years that it’s been in my possession, I’ve only been able to translate about a third of it. It's… dark, and fascinating. What I’ve translated so far tells the story of a priest chosen by God and imbued with the power to summon and bind demons to God’s service, ending the apocalypse. I now believe that I am that priest, and I am here to save the world.

“What I’m reading from is called, when translated, ‘How to Summon the Almighty Demon, and bind it to Your Service.’ What an almighty demon is, I do not know. Guess it’s time to find out.”

Kevin cleared his throat and began reciting from the book. The candles flickered and died, then blazed again with a brilliant intensity.

As he continued reading, the woman, still bound and gagged, lifted her head up. She looked at the camera, and then at Kevin. She smiled.

Kevin was unaware of this; he was lost in the effects of his recitation. The wardings he had painted on the walls and floor were glowing. The candles blazed again. The air had become electrically charged; the little hairs were standing up all over his body.

He finished reading.

The room settled into an uneasy quiet. The wardings shone and glimmered, illuminating the room even more. They started flickering.

She spoke.

“Release me, if you would.”

It was the dead girl, and she had changed slightly; her eyes were no longer human. Her eyes were just the iris, and the colors changed and melted together. She had bitten through her gag with her new teeth, which were much more like a shark’s than a person. When she spoke, Kevin could see two little rows of sharp fangs, waiting to rend and devour.

“Did you not hear me, boy? Release me, and I shall be kind to you. I may even reward you for your astute and wise decision-making abilities.” She chuckled.

“Um, excuse me, demon? Do you not realize who’s in charge? Why would I release you when I have all the power?”

He brandished the holy blade in front of her, trying to intimidate the demon with its presence. She laughed at him.

“Oh, brilliant! I can’t believe you actually got it!” she said. “The silly little lies you tell for fun, and to see them still live on as superstition and legend, after all this time!”

Kevin began feeling dread building inside him. “What are you talking about?” He pocketed the dagger.

“That’s the blade blessed by Peter, right?” She laughed. “A lie told by a demon possessing a foolish cult member. Oh, there were so many cults after the son was resurrected. It was so easy back then, corrupting and turning these foolish little pissants into the very thing they preach against. I see the cults have chosen the right one to grovel to in obeisance. I mean, they made this book and told this story for me. So while the creator’s influence wanes, I shall enter and conquer these weak, foolish people. You’ve freed me at a fortuitous time.

“Now, I really hate it when I have to repeat myself. Release me. Don’t make me break these bonds myself; I won’t be happy if I do.”

His dread churned in his stomach, fermenting into fear. “Wh-what do you mean? The wardings. They’ll keep you, and hold you off until you listen to me, and do what I tell you.”

He turned back to the book, rifling through the pages. The Almighty Demon guffawed uproariously. “Sweet Fuck! You don’t know what you’re doing, do you? Your wall markings are useless! Don’t you know who I am!?!”

She grew tired of playing with him. She flexed her arms, breaking the ropes; The wardings painted on the walls flickered and faded until they were nothing more than paint. She began walking toward him.

“Not a bad idea, the wardings. They only work on demons, though. And while I’m in charge of all the demons and fallen souls, I’m still technically an angel.”

The camera showed the devil leap at Kevin, knocking him to the ground. The camera shook, recording the sounds of screams, flesh tearing, and slurping and gulping.

The devil sat down on the chair, dragging the body of Kevin behind her. Her chin was streaked with his blood.

She sat him on her lap, as a ventriloquist would their dummy.

“So, kids, hopefully you learned today what happens when you try to do something silly. You end up getting killed, and starting the apocalypse.”

She started laughing and noticed that the dead body sitting on her lap wasn’t sharing in her good mood.

“Oh, come on, Kevin. You know it’s funny. Have a laugh with me.”

She resumed her laughter. Kevin started laughing with her.
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This is where the recording stops.