Happy Place

I can hear the wind whistle through the branches. It slashes and thrashes at my body. The leaves in the trees move in a swift brush, almost like hair. I can hear crickets sing and birds harmonizing. So beautiful.

Sitting on a porch chair, gazing upon the beauty that is the Vermont forest,, I'm lost in time. I venture through the landscape that is my mind.

I fly through the many heavens that exist within my imagination, until I arrive at the perfect scenery; my happy place.

A falling cascade, a large pond, and a forest that surrounds the large body of water. I take three steps into the water. Already knee deep. I lift my gaze and what I see takes my breath. Gallons and gallons of water are pressed over a cliff, falling into a collection of water that has been collecting for many years. Frogs,leap from rock to rock. Fish fling over the fall and into the resting pool.

I take a deep breath , dive in head first, and open my eyes. A magnificent world reveals itself as the cloud of sediment simmers.The water is so clear. There are reefs at every corner, sea turtles dashing, one after the other, as if in a game of tag. Octopi, fish , a whale in the distance, all form part of this enchanted scenery. As you align your gaze, you can see the sun's rays piercing the surface of the water. like a projector displaying an image on the bottom of the ocean floor.The light penetrates the surface and then swarms like toxic gas in thin air. You can see particles of light move in front of your face. I look around for anybody to share the experience with, but I am alone, just as I designed it. And i finally feel at peace.

All of a sudden a black gas fills the space around me. Within the span of a minute, I can no longer see anything. Not my hands right in front of my face, not the light that had made its way into the water, nothing. I'm overwhelmed with a feeling of discomfort. A discomfort in not knowing. Not seeing what's around me. I'm hit in the chest with a dull blow. My insides turn upside down. My ears begin to tingle and my arms and legs lose their mass. I'm falling. I've lost my sense of spatial orientation. For what seems like hours, I can't get myself to stop spinning. I float, in this dark abyss, going further and further into space. The comotion of my movement takes from me my sense of time. I feel nauseous and can barely turn my head. In the corner of my eye I see a speck of light. Traveling at incredible speeds, I feel it hit me and stabilize my motion. The spectrum of light begins to widen and before I know it, light has invaded every corner of the space. It's so bright, I have to cover my eyes to keep them from hurting. And just like that. . .Im lucid.

My eyes open. I can see my mother sweeping the living room floor. She's standing right next to me, trying to get the mop under the couch. My body, still in paralysis, begins to recollect sensation. First the tip of my fingers, then my toes, a shock goes up my spine, and I begin to feel my arms. I struggle to get my body to move. my head is in the most uncomfortable position possible---leaning back into the crevice of the seat cushions and the arm rest, but with my chin tucked in, making it difficult to breathe.

"Ghaaaaahhhhh" I gasp for air like I've been held underwater for information. My throat was so sore due to the immense stress I put it through to lift my head up. Never have i felt such fatigue and general discomfort in my life. It was like my body was begging to be in motion, but just couldn't get the jumpstart to do so. My heart was pounding, my eyes were bulging out of their sockets, my ears ringing. I must've looked like a time traveler who got lost in time again.

What a hauntingly beautiful experience.