Halloween Kills: Review

WILL WATCH AGAIN: 8/10

KILLER MOVIE (Horror Scale): ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Let me start off with my first review with a killer of a movie. Out of 5 stars, I would easily rate it a 4. Out of the Halloween franchise movies? This is one of the best ones. Honestly, I had doubts going into the movie, thinking it was going to be much like the other sequels to horrors have been lately. But I was pleasantly surprised.

Again, a warning to anyone who has gotten this far: There will be spoilers ahead. If you have not seen the movie and are avoiding spoilers, this is NOT the review for you!!

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We start the movie back during the setting of the very first Halloween movie. Haddonfield, Illinois has just gotten its first real taste of Michael Myers and everyone is terrified. You see some kids bullying another kid, before leaving him behind to face the shape of fear himself alone. Luckily, the little boy is left alive (for story reasons only—let’s be honest).

After seeing Michael show some pity to a child, we jump back into the action by him attacking some cops. Michael gets his hands on one cop, and instead of shooting Michael in the head, the other ends up shooting his partner. When Michael flees the house (not 100% sure he ever runs away from anything actually), he is met by what appears to be every damn cop in town. Of course, not, a single one shoots. The cop who shot his partner is still inside the house, trying to save his partner… but of course, that’s a lost cause.

This entire scene just showcases the perfection of Michael Myers as a killer and a horror icon. He didn’t even kill anyone, and yet the fear the police officers felt was so real it oozes out of the scene and into your heart. Even if you are screaming at them for not shooting him in the damn head. Like, why does no one ever do that?

So for all the good the first part of this does, the five to six minutes of opening credits makes it feel like it should have been the end of a short film. They look and sound like the original, which I think was a pleasant touch of nostalgia, but those credits could have just gone on the end of the movie and done just as well.

Now we time jump into the present time, and it’s into a bar where we see everyone is partying it up because it’s still Halloween night. Yup, it’s still the same night as from the Halloween movie from 2018. There’s no problem with this at all. In fact, it makes sense. Even if it feels like the night that never ends, I’m sure. But the party?

This is the worst Halloween party I think I’ve ever seen. I’m from a little town in the middle of nowhere, New York and even our Halloween bar parties aren’t like that. Who gets up on stage and gives a speech about the damn Boogeyman? I get that a lot of the survivors of Michael have pent-up emotions and scars and stuff, but that’s what therapy is for, and shots. There’s no need to bring that up at a party.

Oh, and by the way, it’s at this point in the movie we finally get our first Michael kill. Not a complaint either, because it’s so beautifully and artistically done. The shots of Michael emerging from the burning building to confront the firefighters, should have been the movie posters. Instead of the mashup of things, they ended up using. I mean come on; you shot a beautiful scene, why not use it? It’s not like it was a major spoiler or anything. Everyone and their unborn baby knew Michael was going to survive that damn fire. If he didn’t, how were you supposed to have Kills or End?

One thing in the movie that I was picking up on a lot were the comparisons that I was having to playing Dead By Daylight. You can have Michael (or The Shape, as he’s called there) as a killer, and Laurie as a survivor. You can also run around Michael’s childhood home as well. But the thing that got me good was the first person kill shot. It was so simple that you nearly missed it in the mess of action happening around it. But when you re-watch it and focus, it’s magnificent. It reminds me of something right from that game, which I don’t think they intended, but it was a fun little nod none the less.

Now I’m a horror fan, and blood and gore don’t bother me any. But surgery sure does. I have a thing with hospitals, and the shots of Laurie in surgery just made my stomach turn more than Michael carving up that firefighter with the saw blade. Though we also knew she was going to make it through, so the bit of tension from this was completely unnecessary. Unless you wanted to showcase how close her daughter and granddaughter had gotten with her over the night, in which case… carry on.

Now the old couple they showcase are golden. Even as short-lived as they are. The camera shot where you can just see a shape move in the shadows was nicely done, and I had to watch the scene a few times just because I loved it so much. It’s a simple scene that’s basically horror movie filler, but it doesn’t feel that way. We know these two are going to die, but it’s the lead up to it that’s a roller coaster.

This brief scene also gives us the first time I think I can remember where someone is smart enough to grab for a weapon before facing the unknown. Count how many horror movies there are (and no I will not do that and you shouldn’t either—be real here), in all those movies… how many times have you seen anyone grab a weapon before they face something they have heard go bump in the night? Probably counted on one hand.

And now we come to one of my favorite lines in the whole movie. This couple has just realized that there is someone in their home, so the older man locks up. The woman asks stupidly what the figure wanted… but the old man replies perfectly: “Who gives a shit? Call the cops!” That right there should be said in every single horror movie from now on. It’s perfect. Because it’s true. Who really gives a shit? Some wacko in a mask is in my house? I’m calling the cops. No ifs ands or butts.

But this is where the couple clearly messed up, because it’s shown that they completely locked their home up from the inside. Every door is bolted and latched, so how the heck did Michael get in? Horror movie logic says they missed a door, because we know this big man is not going through no window.

The kill with the light bulb was pretty nicely done with the gore and makeup. I’m not sure if it was CGI effects or practical, but either way, they looked amazing. But killing someone off-screen such a kill just doesn’t really sit well with me. Then, of course, we get to see Michael repeatedly stabbing the older man with multiple knifes. Making him a human pincushion. I know we’re not really supposed to get why he does these things, but something tells me Michael has a lot of pent up anger this time around and he’s taking it out on anyone he can get his hands on.

They do some breaking news on the TVs at the bar (again, what bar is playing the news?), and everyone learns that Michael Myers might be back on the prowl. They talk to one lady who flat out claims that it’s always been peaceful there. She looked in her 50s or 60s so, has she been living under a rock? Sure, it had been what, 40 years since Michael first murdered all those teens, but come on. That sort of thing just doesn’t get erased.

All this time watching horror movies and I always lean back on the rules from Scream. You know the ones that Randy talks about? One of them is big that everyone breaks all the time, and in this one you would think they would clearly know better. But of course, they don’t, and the doctor wanders off on her own to start herr car. Only to find someone already in it. The woman rushes back to the bar to get people, assuming that the person is Michael Myers and they form a mob to come out to confront him.

It’s here we see that mob mentality is stupidity. Because only one person in the whole mob has a weapon. Tommy Doyle (yes that Tommy Doyle from the very first Halloween all grown up—no one is surprised).

Alright, let’s be real here folks. I’m in the market to buy a home and… it’s hard. But I still wouldn’t buy a home where I knew murders had taken place in. I don’t care how long ago that had been. I don’t know any real estate agents who would even do something like that. But seriously… who the fuck keeps selling the Myers house? Just burn the place to the ground already!

Tommy Doyle shows he has more balls in one scene than the cops do in this entire franchise. He gathers up nearly the whole town to go on a hunt for evil (“Evil dies tonight” is a poor chant and you should be ashamed). He talks to people all over town and gathers them up, before going to the hospital, and leaving another group to fend for themselves.

Of course, they armed everyone with guns in these groups, but that doesn’t mean they all know how to use them. It’s the most realist thing at least in the movie. Most people nowadays don’t have a clue how to hold a gun, let alone shoot one. So seeing the older woman shoot out all the windows to let Michael into their car, wasn’t surprising. It was actually pretty funny, to be honest. Then the doctor (who’s dressed as a sexy nurse), goes to shoot Michael and he only has to open the car door and she gets hit and ends up shooting herself in the head. This kid is why we practice gun safety, or you use a weapon you actually know how to use when you’re facing off against a masked psychopath.

A big thing about movies like Halloween, Friday the 13th, and Nightmare on Elm Street that I’ve never gotten is the idea that… if you’re running away from the villain, keep looking back at them. Does this somehow keep them chasing you? If you stopped looking, are they magically going to catch you? Or do you do it just to reassure yourself that, yes, you are being chased? Because none of these are good enough answers to why you would slow yourself down in running for your life. Yet, of course, we find it happens here too. She’s lucky she survives, as most would have gotten killed by that stunt.

Michael standing on the bridge, though, had me laughing. He just stands there like he owns it. I couldn’t help but remember Goat Man was a thing.

So back to the hospital where we find Laurie out of surgery and awake now. Her daughter lies to her about Michael. For some stupid reason, I’m sure. To protect her from the reality of it all, maybe? Some daughter love thing? They don’t even reveal to her he’s alive until they’re wheeling Frank Hawkins into the room, and of course Laurie flips out. I would have to. Why would anyone keep this woman out of this fight? Staples in her gut or not (mind you, she called her stab wound a paper cut), she could still kick ass.

The police try to do their job, but Tommy has such a mess now gathered up in town that it’s impossible. People are chanting, people are freaking out, and the cops are useless as they normally are in horror movies. Hell, the sheriff even tries to scream out that “he is the law” and it still doesn’t get any notice or attention.

We head back out of the hospital for another Michael homecoming scene. This time there’s a lovely same-sex couple living in his home. They had been pranked by some kids earlier in the night, but now they’re enjoying a lovely night of music and getting high. While the city is in a panic, these two are locked away inside hell house. Michael always goes home, so it’s no surprise when there’s a knock at the door, and the idiots go to answer it to find no one there.

Why does no one ever remember to lock the door? I know they don’t know they’re in a horror movie, but they know it’s Halloween night and they know that kids in the area are messing with them, so why don’t they lock the door? It’s an idiot move, and it costs them dearly. Seeing the door open, though, you would think it was time to call the cops (though we know they won’t be of help tonight) or grab a weapon. Well, Big John (the other is Little John, and it’s adorable and I love it), has a weapon… a golf club. But he drops it when he sees the backdoor open and hears a noise upstairs, for a damn pocket knife sized knife.

Who does that? The knife isn’t even large enough to cut through someone’s wrist. But it doesn’t matter because neither one gets to use their weapons and they end up pin cushions too, because Michael is now more upset because someone is in his house.

Another plot point that seems to be forgotten about until now, is the fact that Michael wasn’t the only person to escape during the last movie. Another inmate did as well, and now that inmate is running from a mob inside the hospital. It’s nothing but chaos, as Karen tries to get control of the mob and tries to tell them that the inmate isn’t Michael. But no one is believing her because they’re all just blindly following Tommy, who is convinced that it is Michael, because no one has ever seen his face.

We get a sweet scene in between the chaos between Frank and Laurie, where Frank talks Laurie out of blaming herself for this mess. He takes the blame himself, telling her about the opening scene, fingering himself as the man who shot his partner and then turned around and saved Michael from being shot in the head by Sheriff Brackett. Laurie holds nothing against him, and we get another amazing quote. Laurie is just filled with them at the end of this morning.

“Every time someone is afraid, the boogeyman wins.”

This sums up the idea of Michael Myers being more than just a man in a mask. He’s more than just a murderer, he’s the personification of something deeper that clings to every human’s heart. It’s a dangerous game to play with the boogeyman, and humankind will lose every single time. Because fear is his greatest weapon, and our greatest weakness.

Now we go to Allyson, Laurie’s granddaughter, who took off from the hospital to hunt down Michael with her boyfriend and his father. They end up going to the Myers house, realizing that it would all end there, so why not start there?

The whole end of the movie starts with a single gunshot. What should have ended the whole franchise, starts the climax of this movie in such a breathtaking fashion. You knew from the start that the body count was going to be high (and there’s a YouTube channel for that stuff so I’m not counting this stuff here), and you knew that some of those former survivors would not make it. But I had been hoping for Cameron and his dad Lonnie. Lonnie had been bullied as a kid right in front of the Myers home on Halloween night, and he came face to face with the shape and had lived. Cameron had saved Frank in the first part of the movie. But here, the both of them meet the raw rage of Michael Myers.

He becomes a force of nature within the house. Logic doesn’t seem to matter to him, nor does it to anyone else. Because within the first five seconds of seeing him, even Allyson (whose grandmother is Laurie Mfing Strode) ends up losing her weapon and having to face off against him with just her wits.

And boy, is she lacking in those.

Allyson might have been an excellent character if her entire arc wasn’t centered on the fact that her mother and grandmother were fighting. If they had opened her up more in the first movie and this one and let her step more into the shadow that Laurie was leaving behind. But nope. It just feels hollow as she tries to fight back. Karen even coming to save her daughter does nothing to spur the girl on and she’s lost to emotional drowning as the mob and Tommy finally arrive.

The whole fight with the mob, standing around in a circle like some gang about to beat down a rival, is hilarious. They let him put his mask on, that Karen had ripped off to have him chase her down the street, before any of them even bother to attack him. And then, like in every fight movie ever, they attack him one at a time. One guy gets a good hit in on his head, but most are aiming for his body. None of them aim for anything vital, as if they don’t want to kill someone or that they think this will do some good.

It doesn’t. The moment the mob has its guard dropped, Michael pounces. There’s no better word to use. He takes each one out, one at a time. It’s a brutal scene that we don’t get to see the outcome of, but they left us with the image of a street filled with bodies. There is sure to be chaos in Halloween Ends to showcase that scene.

I won’t spoil the rest of the movie, as I think I’ve spoiled enough of it.

The whole movie one question was asked, who is under the mask? Everyone wanted to know who Michael really was. What did he look like? But that is never answered, and I’m glad about it. Because like Laurie Strode says:

“Fear. That is the true face of Michael Myers.”

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