First-Time Buyers

There was only one rule: don’t open the door.

Amber was disappointed. She and Cyprus had viewed so many houses, but this was the only one in their $200’000 budget that wasn’t a dump. This would be their first house together, and she wanted it to be perfect.

“What’s in there?” She asked.

Judy, their realtor, shrugged, “The basement. The seller is working on some minor repairs, so it’s unsafe for now.”

“Can’t we see it before making an offer?” Pressed Amber.

“No. Sorry.” Said Judy with a smile, “But we’ll add an inspection contingency.”

“It’s the best one we’ve seen, Am.” Said Cyprus, “Even if the basement’s a wreck it’s better than the apartment.”

“If you like it, best make an offer,” Said Judy, “This one will sell quickly.”

“Think we should?” Asked Cyprus.

“I guess,” said Amber, sneakily testing the door handle. It was locked.

About a month later, Cyprus and Amber moved in.

“Welcome home!” Said Cyprus with a flourish, “OUR first home!”

“Woo!” cried Amber, embracing Cyprus. “Now,” she said, “Let’s go check out the basement!”

They dashed to the door, and it opened to reveal a dark staircase leading to an even darker basement. A dim tract of light emanated from somewhere in the back.

“They, uh, left a light on.” Said Cyprus,

Amber shuddered, “I don’t like this,” She said.

“Together?”

“I suppose,”

They held each other close, then stepped forward onto the landing.

“The fu…!” exclaimed Cyprus, as the stairs collapsed and sent them tumbling into the darkness.

A dull stench of rot met them, and in the dim light Amber noticed slumped figures along the wall. Amber clung closer to Cyprus, as a shadow appeared in the doorway.

“Welcome Home,” said Judy, smiling as she shut the door.