Broken Mirror

The mirror showed a reflection that wasn't my own. A middle aged lady looked back at me. Like me she had salt and pepper hair , but unlike me she seemed to glow. Her necklace said forever. She turned her head towards me and I saw her kiss a middle aged dark haired man. They kissed repeatedly. They seemed not to notice me. No man stood behind me. I was slightly shaken, was she apart of me? Was she who I could have been if I had made different choices. I finished getting ready, purposely avoiding all the mirrors in my apartment. It was supposed to be a good day, at least according to my date book, lunch at Roar with friends., taco Tuesday. I had a margarita with my tacos, trying to forget my morning. The people in my mirror were not present in our lunch party. I chatted mindlessly about movies and sports. I kept hoping that some one would suggest a date for me. I was meant to have a forever and a good looking man to kiss me. I went to the outing solo and left it solo.

That night I tried a hand held mirror. Again I did not see my reflection. I saw the halls of a house. When I walked into my kitchen it showed a strange kitchen in the mirror. It was a nice house , nicer than mine. Would it soon be mine? I took out my trash. On the way back , the mirror displayed an address. 4154 Buena Vista. I looked it up on the internet. It was local , and it was for sale. I froze threw the mirror on my couch, and collapsed in front of my tv. I couldn't help wondering if God was sending me a sign. Was this my burning bush.

The next morning I avoided the bathroom all together. I put the address into my cars GPS, and drove by the house. It was a nice house but I did not want kids.

The repairman stopped to talk with me. He said the house was cursed. The young man who lived here had killed himself. He had no history of mental problems, until he moved in. His sister would sell it for near to nothing. I listened cautiously. A house does not have the power to classify you as mentally ill , and make you loose touch with reality.

The repairman offered to call the owner for me. I had to laugh she came over so quickly. I wanted the house, I knew it was meant for me. I was not going to kill myself or go insane. I choked when I heard the price. It had a huge yard , a porch. My biggest fear was that I would never want to leave. I was also hoping that the people in the mirror would go away once I moved into my house. I was following their lead. Maybe now my forever love would appear.

The closing came and went quickly. I moved my stuff in with the help of a male friend. I spend most of my time working at my home bound business. I knew I would have to have a house warming party but I was not in a rush. I still timidly avoided all the house mirrors.

Two weeks later a friend {Carol) dropped by. I was surprised when her jaw dropped. She told me to get in the shower , and she would do my hair, and pick out a outfit. I did not want to share with her about the mirrors, so when she had me stand in front of the bathroom mirror I did as I was told. Again my reflection did not meet me , but she was not seeing what I was seeing. I saw a middle aged dark haired man, but my friend was asking me how I thought I looked. She was obviously seeing my reflection. I hugged her and thanked her, and led her to the kitchen. We had coffee, she asked me if I knew the previous owners of this house. She pulled an article out of her purse. The man in my mirror was the ex-owner. I pulled myself together, "He was a good looking young man. They say the house drove him insane " She laughed " You don't really believe that do you? But it did allow you to get a good deal on the house."

Talking to her, I felt peace. When she left I cleaned the house, and washed the sheets ,and called friends whose calls I had been ignoring for the past few months. They educated me on the world issues that I had been missing.

I felt like I was living in denial of reality. There was some reason these visions had come to me, and yet I was currently ignoring them. but yet I knew I had control over my fate. Some image in a mirror was not in control of my life. I was a little confused, but knew at all cost to avoid a therapist.

Carol was not helping. She had decided to do research on this young man. She was trying to prove to me and herself that the house did not drive the man insane. The more I read about his life the more normal he seemed. I wondered if he saw someone else's image in his mirrors? When ever I did look in a mirror I would see him. One time the image of him was of him pounding and breaking the bathroom mirror. He was on 5 or 6 medications. I laughed those obviously had not been the answer to his problems. The shrinks would have medicated Moses, and many other biblical figures.

The next morning I was surprised to see that my whole bathroom mirror had cracked. In the middle was the man sitting on the steps crying. The mirror showed steps, leading to numerous direction, with this man crying. There was no clear path for me to follow. If it was a message, I didn't know what it was. I wished I could comfort him. Maybe instead of medication he needed comfort and support. Not to be told that he was less capable but do be convinced that he could do more. Maybe he needed a kiss and a lady who promised to remain with him forever.