Geeks logo

Why Lorelai Gilmore is Kind of a Crappy Friend

She's undeniably my favorite character, but hear me out

By Natalie BradenPublished 3 years ago 7 min read
Like
Why Lorelai Gilmore is Kind of a Crappy Friend
Photo by Sam Manns on Unsplash

In the fall of 2000, Amy Sherman-Palladino gave us one of the greatest dramedies on television: Gilmore Girls. Set in a picturesque Stars Hallow, (a tiny town even my loner self would kill to live in) young Lorelai Gilmore raises her daughter, Rory, in all her single mother glory. Chock-full of pop culture filled references and mile-a-minute speech, their close-knit "friends first, mother/daughter second" relationship is one to be admired. Alongside the duo stars Melissa McCarthy as Sookie- the loveable, quirky, perfectionist chef; Lorelai's coworker at the Independence Inn, and trusted best friend.

Viewers of course love and admire the ride-or-die, dazzled friendship of Lorelai and Sookie, but from season 1, the underlying DISRESPECT begins. During the town rummage sale, Sookie surprises Lorelai, Rory, and Lane with Bangles tickets. These 9th-row aisle "dream seats" were given by a more than satisfied customer, wild about Sookie's "Fiji Fantasy" wedding cake. When the Heathers from high school hell come to study with Rory, Lorelai decides to give the tickets to the foursome literally without even consulting Sookie. We all know what happened at the actual concert, making this swap totally fruitless. Points for Sookie for making the best out of the nosebleeds with charm and hilarity. Did you slave away and bake what I assume to be a 6 tiered, orchid-covered, sugar-spun waterfall cake, Lorelai?

I think we all remember the first jab Lorelai took at Sookie while in her kitchen a failed attempt at ice skating a la Tonya Harding. Sookie hits the nail on the head about Lorelai's two-month fleeing pattern ("cha, cha, cha"). She insults Sookie about her lack of relationships. Immediately apologizing of course, that was a low blow. You can sing Ricky Martin songs to me anytime you want, Melissa McCarthy. Sookie totally called it from day one about Luke and continued to be pro-Lukelai (Loruke? Not as fun with the same first letter). When Sook suggests the connection, Lorelai is always all, "what? who? what planet am I even on?" Cut to the Independence kitchen scene after retelling the Stella situation, where Lor is like bye Sookie, all butthurt that she's right. More like, BYE TO YOU,CLEOPATRA QUEEN OF DE-NILE *adolescent Rory voice*

Let's talk about two instances where Lorelai straight doesn't show up to work. She assumes her entire relationship is over based on her run-in with Luke at Dosey's, and she sinks into her bed of depression. Understandable, but you left your bestie and sass-pot concierge to run your uppity/creepy doll-filled child birthday. Even when she once again, doesn't call Sookie to give her notice, Sookie ends up checking on her (probably thinking she was deathly ill or god forbid finally had a heart attack from eating fried food and Redvines). Sookie waited around until Rory comes home and probably had to haul ass back to the inn to make more miniature pancakes.

The second time around, Lorelai has a breakdown over Paul Anka's doggy flu (in which the vet said he'd be fine, so). Of course, we realize with Lorelai's cry face confession about being a bad mother is pointed to her separation from Rory. Nevertheless, she stayed up all night lamenting about how dogs can't watch TV and Milk Bones suck, therefore Luke calls Sookie telling her Lorelai isn't making it to work. I'm not suggesting you should never take off work, but did we see Sookie blow off the inn once she had kids, was put on bed rest or broke her ankle in a mysterious marshmallow cookie incident? Negative.

Sookie does some (in my opinion) warranted meddling to reunite Lorelai and Rory in Season 6: She asks them both to be godmothers to Davey and Martha Glindacarsondaisydannieathanrupert. When holding the kids at church, Lorelai is obsessed with how Sookie got a hold of Rory-so much that she talks over Father whatshisname and forgets to renounce Satan. That's rude enough, but then she proceeds to pause the baptism and takes the children out of the church just to lecture Rory about keeping her phone number (so she could, you know, not call her all this time while being salty). Way to ruin someone else's day with your issues that center around-GASP- your daughter needing a break from expensive ass Yale.

Friendship is knowing when to help a sister out with the truth but knowing when to shut your judge-y trap for their own happiness. During the planning of Sookie's wedding (which I do not think got enough airtime) all Lorelai does is undermine her music preferences and jumps to suggesting sewing "the least ugly bridesmaid dresses ever worn". How about you wear whatever the hell your BFF wants you to like all of us tortured wedding party attendees?

Side note: Even though Sookie asked for a distraction while freaking out in her wedding dress at 3 am, Lorelai kind of steals her thunder spilling that she and Christopher just did the dirty. Also, she up and invites ruiner baby-daddy to the wedding all like, yeah this wasn't built on a budget or anything

During their partnership and revamping of the Dragonfly Inn, Lorelai has a meltdown and tries to scold Sookie when her attempted haircut is interrupted by a stove delivery. I feel for Lorelai's lack of partnership, but she completely bypasses that Sookie is a new mom. She is sleep-deprived, packing in doctor visits, her house is a mess, and she's broke from the remodel. Lorelai tries to mock her baby high and remind her that Michel has another job. My favorite is when she exclaims "I haven't had a second for myself" to the mother of a newborn. What exactly are you doing outside of this inn, selfish size 0 pants?

Let's list the occasions she's had Sookie cook a buttload of food for her own consumption or request: the night that TERROR GARBAGE PERSON Jess came to town, her mother's impromptu bachelorette party, her mother's impromptu Stars Hollow visit, her grandmother's impromptu Stars Hollow visit (ok, ok that was a part of the inn ), her father's whiskey inspired sad turtle food, her father's post-heart attack fish diet, and her grandmother's funeral. I know Sook loves her job and ability to feed an army but come on. Lorelai should be worshipping the goat cheese-filled ground she walks on.

The biggest fight of their friendship ensued over Independence Inn owner Mia (two different actors-one way older than the second) coming back to Stars Hollow, admitting to Lorelai that she was looking to sell. After being late for a meeting with Fran the cupcake lady, we see how dedicated Sookie is to simply not serve a similar dessert for their regulars. Shortly after, Lorelai has a crap attack and slams Sookie for changing the menu on the reg, suggesting "you do that with our place, it could hurt us" Would it though? This whole shebang ends with Lorelai being miss know-it-all-business school-crab ass and basically makes Sookie cry. Do we ever see Sookie say anything mean, untrue, or that hurtful back at her? No sir.

I can't get into it about Christopher because that dill hole is a waste of time, but when Sookie bangs her pots and pans to interrupt their phone call in Season 7, I was like yaaaasss girl, those gourds ARE really thick. Sookie warns Lorelai about using Chris as a rebound and isn't on board with their marriage. Still, never tells her "I told you so" when it inevitably crashes and burns. Why are you not listening to your best friend with a successful marriage and family? You're not into that? Lorelai is not int

In the end, Sookie's life events are kind of bypassed, especially when Lorelai has a meltdown or ping pongs between relationships. Lorelai rearranging Sookie's fridge when she was salty over Rory prancing around in Europe still bothers me, to be honest. WHY WOULD YOU CARE ABOUT THE INN'S FRIDGE WHEN YOU NEVER HAVE FOOD TO ORGANIZE IN YOURS?! I'm not saying Sookie is perfect either (I'm with Lorelai on the LOTR kid birthday fiasco) and don't get me started on A Year In The Life. But there will never be another nutball chef who forgets the name for salt and her wild haired, non-committal bestie on Sores & Boils Alley.

review
Like

About the Creator

Natalie Braden

Just a manic creative, lazy wanna-be Wiccan, baby puke covered childcare teacher looking for an outlet to write.

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.