Which Apocalypse Personality Are You? This Movie Has Them All

As a movie, this one is low on plot but high on comedy. Within the first half hour, all of the characters' personalities (and some of their secrets) as well as the catalyst for the apocalypse are revealed as these four couples sit down to brunch. It quickly becomes clear that their dysfunctional relationships with one another are simply not strong enough to withstand this external crisis...or are they?

Throughout the movie, you see these characters respond much as many of us currently are: a mixture that doesn't seem to bode well for their survival. And my favorite line? When one of the characters points out that the radio broadcast they tune in to tells everyone to stay in their homes and seal up any possible entry points for toxic air, his response is that they can survive inside on the supplies they have for five days, tops. Oh, sweetie, try five weeks. So, which of these personality archetypes would you fall under?

The Alarmist

Shane barely seems present at first, attached to his phone in a bid for a comic book as these friends start arriving for their ritual weekend brunch. He's the first to notice, though, when the internet and TV not working might mean something suspicious is going on. And when a neighbor shows up at the door in a Hazmat suit, Shane is the one who starts talking survival simulations. It's as if he comes alive only when threatened with annihilation, then seems to be overly animated and aggressive as others question his sensibility. He conducts secretive meetings with others, tries to form pacts and alliances, asks questions about mutants and weapons, and eventually convinces everyone they'd be better off trying to drive away from the danger rather than do nothing...until they realize the car battery has been drained by various characters using the car radio.

The Unbeliever

We all have that friend. You know, the one who refuses to acknowledge the crisis but instead sees it as a political tactic, or fear-mongering by the liberal media? Lexi is that character in this movie, and she's set up to perfectly question every decision to safeguard the house. In looking for a radio with the others, she peels off from the group to practice bowling instead, and is one of the characters responsible for draining the car's battery, leaving everyone without an escape option. She reveals that she doesn't believe the moon landing took place, using this as "proof" that just because the media reports something doesn't make it true. She clearly wears on the others as she counters the actions they take, but Rachel Boston portrayed this character amazingly well.

The One Who Is Strangely Ok With It

Buck is Lexi's husband in a pretty open marriage that ends up in the thick of the drama, but he's incredibly laid back from the get. As others react to the frightening news that several dirty bombs have been set off around the country and the nerve gas is airborne close to where they are brunching, Buck just sits back and lets others try to save them all. In fact, the most concern he shows in the movie is when he discovers that it's not "duck tape" but rather, "duct tape." He even reassures others that they're all headed for Heaven, which is even better than where they are. As characters make decisions, he just follows their lead and gets freaky with his wife one last time.

The One Who Can't Handle It

Hedy, played by America Ferrara, is a chemistry teacher who's in the perfect position to fully understand the magnitude of the situation. So, of course, she responds first with shock and next with getting drunk. Then, she grabs everything in the medicine cabinet and decides to cook up "the poor man's ecstasy." Oh, and for good measure, because the world is ending, she tells Shane, with whom she's engaged, that the wedding is off. As more information comes in about what is happening, she's the one who pieces together that the bombs contained nerve gas, the most lethal chemical weapon on the planet.

The Logical One

Julia Stiles portrays Tracy, a doctor with really bad luck when it comes to dating. She shows up with Glen, who has never met the group before, and she is able to rationalize the others' choices both because she is not involved in the drama and because she feels less a part of the group. She's upset, sure, and she understands the severity of the situation, but she keeps the rest focused and purposeful, attending to Hedy when she goes into shock and questioning the crazy ideas of her friends.

The Religious One

Glen doesn't know anyone apart from Tracy, and for most of the movie seems to be the calmest. Well, there's a reason for that. Unbeknownst to the others, he spikes the wine with pills and rat poison in an attempt to prepare their souls for The Rapture. As crazy as this plot twist is, it's not unusual. Difficult times drive some to look for answers beyond the human experience.

The Couple More Focused On Their Drama Than On Dying

Emma and Pete have a reason for inviting everyone for brunch, and the tension within the group stems mostly from these two and their crumbling marriage. At various points, the full levity of the disaster that is occurring is actually eclipsed by revelations of secrets that affects almost all of the group members. Rather than be helpful, these two detract from survival and even put the group in danger with their selfish priorities.

So, who are you during this quarantine? And more importantly, are you helping or hurting those around you? Both those with whom you are quarantined, but also our society at large? Whichever personality you see yourself as, this might be a good flick to watch in these dark times. It's light enough to make fun of our situation (even though it was filmed eight years ago) with enough meat to weigh down the ensuing chaos that most friend groups could understand. But whatever you do, stay inside. Pretend the air is toxic and that going outside will kill you. Wow, this movie is completely applicable to COVID-19.