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The Vampire Diaries

by Cherenda Laverne about a year ago in tv
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The TVD therapy that helped me cope.

I first got into The Vampire Diaries back in 2014 when my marriage was falling apart. I mean I was the only one who saw it falling apart, but none the less it was. TVD was my escape. I remember sitting on the stairs of our cozy townhome. Headphones in, and my two kids running around with their father and I had no desire to participate in the day today. I drowned out the sound of a collapsing marriage and my inability to cope with my life as a mother by throwing myself into a show that awoke so many hidden desires and emotions inside of me. I probably binged through the first couple of seasons without a breath in between. I remember losing sleep over this show and talking about it with co-workers the next day. I think we were all collectively going through our problems and this was an escape we could all relate to.

Fast forward 2 and a half years later, and I found myself divorces, and in another collapsing relationship. The hardest love I have had to lose in my life lasted 10 months! I shed more tears for a man I knew less than a year, over a man I knew 10 years of my life. A man I married, and who made me a mother first. So it is no surprise that my guilty pleasure show was The Vampire Diaries. Riddled with deception, toxic love, and triangles that never seemed fully satiated by the drama that unfolded.

It is hard to admit, but I have watched and re-watched all 8 seasons of this show at least 10 times in the last 5 years. Every time it takes me back to a moment in my life where I could relate to the pain and agony, and despair that followed Elena Gilbert and the Salvatore brothers. Every time the dysfunction took over, and the love quarrels ended in deeper romanticizing of poor judgment and even poorer love choices. It made me feel normal. Go figure! A show on immortal vampires and teen drama quenched my hunger and pain for belonging and understanding why my life was the royal crap show it had become.

I was still so involved with my current ex, and our relationship was very much like Elena and Damon. It was wrong, it went against all the cosmic odds but we could not keep our hands away from one another. Every step we took was 10 steps back, but 1 step closer to one another. We both knew how bad we were for one another, and yet here we were! Reveling in the dysfunction, deception, and overall poor choices we were making by continuing to see one another. Even after we both had new relationships. I would use TVD to cry over wounds in my own life I could not come to terms with. It was almost as if the show was a free subscription to talk therapy. Only I was the one coaching myself with a teen drama that had to factual basis in real life. It however did help heal a lot of wounds that are still very sore to this day. It is also a show that has shown me many things in my world that I wish to have or wish to remove. Healthy relationships are now far more appealing than that of the sad story that was Elena Gilbert.

I am not embarrassed to say that this show was my crutch; or that it was many times a reflection of my reality. I however am sad that of all the shows my life could reflect it was one based on immortals, death, and forbidden love. Sounds kind of romantic doesn't it? Like I should have been cast for a lead in a role quite like Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet. However, that is not my reality and this was simply a beautiful escape during a very dark time. An escape that was lived through another's darkest times played out by a teenage girl in Virginia. One who falls in love with two brothers, and ultimately dies at their expense. Even if it is to live on as an immortal and eventually get her life back. I too have gotten mine, and I think that is in no correlation to this show. However, it is a funny coincidence.

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About the author

Cherenda Laverne

Just an aspiring writer who loves to get lost in her head, and write down whatever comes to mind.

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