Pirate Points and Dashed Dreams

Does it feel sometimes like you're just sailing through life? You know that restless urge to do something, whatever it is, just so that you don't have that all at sea feeling in your gut? There is constantly so much hullabaloo around, whether it is the phones, the coworkers, the projects, the distractions, my mind all at sea. No matter how much you research what it means to meditate, to make your life shipshape, it seems like life just pushes straight past you and leads in a different direction. Like a broken compass. This work is essential. It is the mast that holds up my sail, that will get me to where I need to be. But you are by and large feeling like you're stuck in high and dry, wanting to stop and breath in the salty air, to paddle in the untame sea. Yet what happens? The shrieking eels come all too quickly and you become a rat trying to desert a sinking ship.

This tale could be anyone’s, an exaggerated yarn of a relatable moment. Have you ever had that moment where you thought your life was going to be something akin to surfing and you find yourself on a desert island with no raft, not even a volleyball for company? That's pretty much what happened, only with less sand. Let me explain. My life has not tracked a course that I thought it would. My dream was to be a pirate princess and to push the boat out, anchors away into the unknown. So instead of building a raft and battening down the hatches, I waved down a passing pirate. This pirate seemed a friendly pirate, but I was left high and dry. I thought at first we could work this out, but when several times over he left me on an island while he explored the ocean like a loose cannon, I began to wonder if I were the pirate princess that I always imagined I would become. Eventually the messages started floating in. Any message in a bottle comes in all shapes and sizes. Some said that being a pirate princess was not all it was cracked up to be. Some explained that I needed to take to the air and learn the ropes. Some said that I was sailing close to the wind and it was too risky. They might have been right. But I learned that I had to chart my own course. So I decided to create something to convince my pirate to come home. I stitched together a flag and gave a shot across the bows. He didn't ever come back to my island, but would wave at me from the sea.

Eventually, I hailed a flagship and made it back to dry land. I dropped the pirate princess and decided to go by the board and wait it out. No more travel in deep waters, no more ships in the night. I learned that putting an ear to a conch with a friend was sometimes more useful than striking out plain sailing on my own. Creating sandcastles on the beach might not have been a desert island, but it was close to some campfire company. Some days I miss the life of a pirate princess. That ship has sailed! But perhaps being in the same boat is better. I am not always where I want to be by and large, but being patient eventually brings smooth water.

A new adventure glides towards me like that ship on the horizon, the sails reflecting the sunset colors. I’m just waiting. So what's next?