What are the biggest movie flops of all time?
What makes a movie flop? Is it bad writing, direction, marketing, or that it just plain ole sucks. That's the question that can be answered in some of the biggest movie flops quiz.
I have compiled 20 of the top worst performing films of all time. How many can you name? Can you walk on The Great Wall like Sinbad or defy gravity like John Carter?
It's a pretty tough quiz, I must admit. Even making this bad boy, I had to look long and hard at some of the miscreant movies that passed our time. For the some that I have seen, I have a brief review.
John Carter (2012)
I have to admit, I didn't mind this one. I first watched it prone on a sofa, incredibly hungover-so I couldn't really move anyway. I thought it was fun, safe, Disney-but could have used a bit more sweary violence. As much as this one tanked on production and marketing costs, it surely has made up for it in nostalgia. It's one of those Sunday, throw it on in the background & it keeps the kids stunned for a few precious ten's where you can zone out. And the hangover thing too.
The Lone Ranger (2013)
Johnny Depp as a drunken native American in a warbled and disjointed hack piece was never a good idea. Either he was 'Charlie Sheening' it through the process of 'method', or he methodically had a plan to tank this Disney cruiseliner. He's not as stupid as the pressy-public likes to believe. But this movie was stupid. I don't use the word 'stupid' around my kid, because it's a pretty targeted word that's hard to shake. It's the 'N word' of intelligence mitigation. But this was stupid. It looked like it was cut when JD & the crew drank all the JD & coked out the editing room, spending 3 days to cut a 2 minute scene. For 8 months. Was it an 'f-u' to Disney to oblige his contract? Maybe. If so it was a good waste of their money & his.
The Adventures of Baron Munchausen (1988)
I loved this film as a kid, so screw you. This was an awesome film as a child, and I also have a massive Canadian boner-town for Canadian starlet Sarah Polley. Mmmm. It was imaginative, and the FX were great for the time. And let's talk about the cast...Terry Gilliam, John Neville, Eric Idle, Oliver Reed, Jonathan Pryce, & Uma Thurman. C'mon!! What a cast, what a movie! When I read that this movie was classed a 'flop', I couldn't believe it at first. It had a $46 million dollar budget in 1988 which was massive, but it only took in an initial $8 million at the box office, it must have cleared HUGE numbers in the years after, when VHS & DVDs were still a liquid currency. The real flop of the picture may have been Terry Gilliam himself. The firey Brit had riled studio execs after his previous 'Brazil' flop, & this may have been a PR attempt to throw him under the bus. The real reason this movie was plowed was PR & advertising in the golden age of 1988 when Big, Cocktail, Rainman & Beetlejuice ruled. Maybe American audiences weren't ready, maybe it was too expensive, maybe it just needed time. Watch it again.
Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever (2002)
Asian woman, aging Latin man in a film that was to be forgotten. Ugh. I watched this one on the couch hungover too, but this time I shook off the malaise and pounced on the remote. The movie was worse than the hangover, & this was an Old Fashioned hangover. Sweet and punchy. This movie was neither of those. It was pukey, bacon sandwich in the ashtray, naked grandma's herpes pictures from the old age home hangover movie. I chugged water & went for a walk, which is what this movie should have done.
Justice League (2017)
This was a movie I had to watch several times before I actually completed it. Luckily I downloaded a Korean subtitled version of it 2 months after it came out. The film was more disappointing than the quality. It's bad enough when you have a BAD superhero script, but it's worse when you have BAD actors. Just 'cause they're pretty, don't mean it they can act none. The scenes and FX were cheesy & it looked like it was noted & cut by a dozen dulled drone dummies. DC needs to get it right, & they will. They're like the AFC to the NFC. They might start off slow, but they will come on.
See how you do on my quiz, and check out my YouTube channel for more fun videos.