Life/Love After/During Lockup Weekly Review Season 3: Episode 59: Bitter Baby Mamas & Bae-cations

If you’re used to my bullet point commentary about the show from my Facebook posts, don’t worry, this is it!!! but there’s a lot I have to cover now.

At this point, I’m going to assume you clicked on this article because you’re either a family member, friend or associate of mine AND/OR you’re familiar with the show I am referencing in the title.

Either way, hi guys!!! 👋,lol!!!

Speaking of the title of the show, #WETV, I love you guys, I really do, but yeah is the show named…

Love After Lockup?

OR

Life After Lockup?

And what in the flying fajita is “Love During Lockup”?

But because of the way my life is set up now, 🤣, I’m assuming I’m gonna be seduced into watching that show and writing about it as well, so stay tuned.

Because after all, the season finale is next week and all of the commercials have me confused. So, let’s start there:

For brevity sake, I’m just gonna blame the Pandemic filming conditions for the cast/show overlap, and I’m actually going to re-watch this episode while I’m writing because it helps my process & my memory.

Shawn & Sara

Kathy (Sara’s Mom) irks me, but I mean ,I get it, she had to raise her granddaughter because Sara was in jail & Shawn has six kids already…so ewe.

Kristianna & John

This storyline used to fill me with so much joy & giggles. But to be honest I missed a lot of the beginning of it with the sister Tara & the Mom & stuff.

Now that Kristianna’s Mom has cancer, I don’t giggle, as much, and feel really, really bad for saying her chemo wigs looked like they were put together with what was on the floor of the makeup room from the set of Love & Hip Hop Miami.

I’m not recanting my statement, because it’s true, I just apologize if it hurt anyone’s feelings🤷🏻‍♀️. I sincerely feel like shit about it. And if my guilt can’t get any worse, wait???

Did John say he hasn’t seen his sister since she was eight years old when their father’s METH LAB ON THEIR FARM WAS RAIDED?!!!

Jesus, Mary, Joseph & the camel everyone rode to get to the manger!!!

How freakin tragic is this whole freakin family? Well apparently, John’s father was wanted by the FBI at one point before he got his daughter hooked on meth at age eleven?😳

So, I’m hurt for John yet I’m confused why Kristiana ran but I wish them the best. I know under normal circumstances that statement would make absolutely no rational sense, but trust me, lol, it fits.

Britney & Ray

Ion like Fiona, Y’all know I don’t like Fiona. I can’t put my finger on why though. I think it’s because I believe she was groomed to be a narcissist since she’s has the intelligence of her synthetic hair.

I’m telling y’all she’ used to live in a group home at some point in her life, because every time she reads her script for us, I want to wipe the drool off her chin.

How-frickin-ever- I will say I liked her dress at her party.

But from the sneak-peek of the Season Finale, is it possible the ring didn’t fit??? 🤣 And that’s why she needed to take an Uber right quick so she could get it sized? . 🤣

Prolly not, so Ray needs to stop smokin them cigars or whatever else he smokes before he goes to bed with Fiona and RUN!!!

Lacey /Shane /(John-the dumb John )

Honestly, I care about Lacey as much as she cares to get offa opiates and raise her kids. Her goal in life seems to be to be a silicone sculpted amateur porn star.

Shane, poor thing, has lost so many brain cells he starting to style his hair in the infamous Stan combover for his interviews. John is just a wack ass, weak ass dude yo.

Just let me know which one ODs first to FINALLY END this storyline. It sucks.

Puppy & Amber

I like Puppy & I dunno why🤣, but she’s makes piss poor decisions. .

I actually like her fiancé Eric, too, but he don’t think straight neither.

Poor Puppy’s Mom is a sentence I’d never thought I’d type. And now I wish I watched this storyline more carefully because I wanna know how she got the nickname Puppy.

Stan musta got a haircut cuz apparently somethin’s bout to go down with him & Lisa next week.

And lest we forget…

Daonte /Nicolle/Tia

Please, unless Daonte’s mama, muds-stomps Nicolle, let us end this storyline too & make room for Marcellino & Brittany!!! They are officially my faves!!!

If I missed anything or if ya have somethin to ask/add feel free to comment, like, subscribe, share/tip.💜💜💜