Snake, Woman, Man

Woman and Man wondered the Land of the Blue Sphere, as nomads. Surviving off its spoils. The fruits, crops and wild game. They were very much in love. They had no one, only each other. But this was sufficient.

One day, whilst Man toiled on the land, Woman bathed herself in the blood of the aloe vera plant. She had discovered that this botanical boosted her immunity and significantly improved the quality of her skin. For Woman was a beauty amongst beauties. And she enjoyed keeping her skin soft and supple for Man’s pleasure. He was besotted and spent many an hour caressing her silky smoothness.

As Woman bathed in the juices of the aloe, Snake slunked slowly into her vision. Snake was encaptured as he tasted, with his sharp tongue, the aromas of the scents exuded by Woman's womanliness. And, such glowing skin he had never encountered, not on a human species in any event. He himself had rough, dry, scaly skin. He spent no time in grooming himself. He neglected his health, of this he was well aware. His immune system was weak. Therefore, he was often bedridden with one form of a virus or another. There was a current virus in the air, which he had been trying desperately to avoid. It was a never seen before mutant and rather deadly from what was being said within his grapevine. It had been named the oddest of names. Corona Virus.

Snake questioned what she was doing. Woman explained she was beautifying herself for her Man. It was his birthday. He was toiling the land for food for a celebratory meal, which he would cook himself, as Woman could not cook in a style that was edible. Man was hunter, gatherer and cook. She, in turn, provided Man with her love and affection. She gave him the respect he deserved and she was obedient in all that Man desired.

Snake seethed. He was lonely and longed for a partner. But no other snake, male nor female, found him desirable enough to coil with and to slither and slide alongside. He was seen to be aesthetically unpleasing. Apparently. Even his huge amount of wealth was not a lure for a lover. He had tried for many years to win the heart of his neighbour’s young daughter, the Asp. He had attended many mating balls and fought piles of snakes for the Asp. The wench looked at him in only but disgust. It was a shame, because Snake would for sure make a fierce mate for the Asp. Ah well, she was the loser for sure.

The feeling of envy that consumed the snake caused him to behave capriciously. Why should Man and Woman have each other and live happily ever after? He asked Woman about the gift she would give to Man. Woman’s eyes saddened and the bright glint faded to a dull gloom. She explained it was impossible to get Man a gift, as they were poverty stricken.

Snake’s eyes swirled rapidly as a thought entered his mind, in that moment. He devised a plan. He said, you are surely a beauty amongst beauties with the silkiest of skin. I like you, said Snake to Woman. Let us be eternal friends. Look here, he proclaimed almost with a taste of snarl. I possess wealth. I will gladly give you some to spoil your Man on this glorious day upon which he was born.

Woman was surprised. Surely he was jesting with her she queried? No, said he. I do not jest. You will loan me wealth, she questioned? No, replied Snake, not loan. I will give it to you. There is no need for you to re-pay me.

Woman could not believe the words she so clearly understood to have been rattled by this creature. Snake was unattractive for sure. Menacing even. But he had verisimilitude, she observed. He was certainly, the most generous of creatures. She smiled and in that moment, the deal was sealed.

Snake, hissed. He danced a dance and he twirled and twerked his tail in a ritual that he had practiced laboriously in the lonely hours of his abode, in front of a mirror. Look ye here, he declared. I will give you this wealth and I will give it to you in the form of a new currency that is taking over the community of the Land of the Blue Sphere. This currency is hailed as the future. It is called ‘cash’ and it is produced from the wood of the Paper Tree. I will give you 20,000 gold coins, but in the form of £20,000 in cash. Woman was well read and was familiar with this currency. It was declared as the cutting edge currency of choice for the wealthy. She had no problem with that.

Snake added, by the way, I almost forgot to say. In return for the cash, you must do something for me. Nothing’s free in life, right?

Anything my dear, generous Snake, said Woman. Take this little black book said Snake, and hide it for me. He held out a book, black in colour with a moleskin-like substance. Woman had never laid eyes on such a fascinating object. She did not recognise the term ‘book’. Snake explained that the book contained data records, which he had been guarding, so that it did not get into the clutches of those who were known to be the ‘evil ones’. Woman had heard stories of the evil kind, although they did not live in the Land of the Blue Sphere. They existed beyond, in the far reaches of the deepest parts of the waters of the oceans. No being had ever seen an evil one. Only heard frightening tales about them.

Snake proclaimed that he had become wary of carrying this heavy load, referring to the book. He commanded Woman to take it and conceal it in such a place, that not even the Gods themselves would find it. Woman contemplated this. Surely the Gods are all knowing, all seeing and all hearing she quizzed.

She questioned why the need to conceal the book. Because, said Snake, it held data of the highest security level, crucial for the entire snake species. It contained a list of rules and regulations and guidance towards eternal life. Furthermore, it held sacred knowledge on the origins of the snake species, the meaning and purpose for their existence and what would happen to them upon their death.

The responsibility was passed on to me by my late father explained Snake. However, I fear I do not possess the strength for such a load, he hissed defeated. It is a huge effort and extremely restrictive on the lifestyle I wish to enjoy.

Woman fantasised about all that she could do with the £20,000 cash. Not only could she buy Man an extravagant birthday present, she could also purchase fine silks and organza fabrics detailed in gold and silver threads, inclusive of each of the colours found within the feathers of the male peacock. Pearls to adorn her hair, diamonds for her ears, and gold and ruby and sapphire jewels. She shrieked with excitement. Goodness, how beautiful these material items would make her. The amount of happiness they would bring. She was miserable with dressing in animal skins, so vile with the most unpleasant of stenches.

Woman was not confident of her ability to conceal this book. But she needed the cash. She wanted the cash. She wanted silk and organza clothing for herself and her Man. To cover their shameful nakedness, something which they had become very aware of in recent days.

Upon handing over £20,000 in cash, and the book, Snake hurriedly slithered away, in a pathetically centrifugal style. For he knew what he had done. After greed, follows calamity. He knew this well. Woman's greed-induced happiness would be short-lived he sighed, gleefully.

Woman spent time pondering over where to hide the book. Out of sight even from the Gods. She pondered and she pondered some more. As dusk was setting and the sky goddess Nut would soon swallow Ra, the sun god, Woman realised that she must now act in haste.

The Sacred Pyramid would be an appropriate location. At the bottom of Hang Man’s Hill. Legends told that this Pyramid had been constructed by mysterious beings from the skies. Perfectly aligned in shape, many of such structures had been erected throughout the lands. There were quite a few of them in the Land of the Blue Sphere. But this one, at the bottom of Hang Man’s Hill was older than the oldest of the pre-historic pyramids. Stories of a menacing monster residing within the caves under the structure lingered in Woman's mind as she approached its entrance, to discard the book therein. Yes, she would discard it into the mouth of the Pyramid. The book would sink into the waters of the rivers that ran and be carried away by the currents of the currents that pulled. It would be concealed forever, in the waters of the unknown waters, of the known and unknown, worlds. And so it was done.

Upon completion of the task, Woman made her way to the shops. To purchase jewels and fabrics. She could hardly contain her excitement. Then tomorrow, she contemplated, she would go with Man to the estate agents and purchase that palace she had been dreaming to own ever since it went on the market, after the owner was found dead. Cause of death, unknown.

En route to the shops, she stopped to fill her watering bag with the waters of the river of Fresh Salt-less Water. It was free to get the water supply from here, as the shops charged extortionate amounts of coins. The only problem with doing this was the inconvenience involved. Woman hated getting her clothes wet during the effort driven, slog of a process. Plus the waters of the river were rough, with an angry force and a dark energy. She did not like being in this place without Man.

As Woman filled her watering bag, a current took hold and sprayed her with an explosive spray of foamy water. It shot her in the face with the sheer force of a kaleidoscope of butterflies. In the moment, Woman lost her balance, slipped on a wet rock, and fell backwards, into the shallow waters for an appropriate amount of time. The cash, clamped in her left hand, went down with her. Her left hand hit something. The pain was excruciating. Woman yelped and closed her eyes. Upon the passing of 25 seconds, the waters stood back. Woman managed to lift herself out of the shallow waters and onto dry land. Upon regaining her wits, she gasped. The cash. The cash was gone. No longer in her left hand, which was exuding blood from a blunt looking gash. She did not see it in her right hand either. The cash, alongside the book, had washed away, into the abyss of the foams of the rivers, which would become the oceans. Woman was a dunce, she knew this well.

Woman sought Snake. Upon locating him, she relived the course of events, shedding tears upon recounting the trauma. She looks like a drowned rat mused Snake, as he tolerated her whining. Woman begged for a further cash injection as she was left with nothing. Snake refused. They argued. Woman threatened to reveal the whereabouts of the black book to the entire Land of the Blue Sphere. Snake, afraid that she may in fact do this, bit her heels with his super potent, lethal venom. Woman was dead instantaneously.

Man recovered from the pain of Woman's loss, and wed a second wife, Mary. Mary cooked him meals that were edible. However, her skin did not glow and was not silky smooth. Mary did not bathe in the juices of the eternal aloe.

Snake was never seen again. Neither was the book.