Nature Avoidant

Nature expands the heart and connects us deeply, but it is also an intense uncertainty and death anxiety.

Long ago we began to shape nature to feel more safe and certain. More shape and structure moved us further and further away from the place that expands our heart. Wild and free plant life is banned in major cities. Allowing nature to be free is literally not allowed. We can only tolerate seeing nature through our symbolic conquering of its death and uncertainty. We mechanized behavior with money. We ran so far from nature we forgot that we are part of nature. If we had nature as our self concept, we would see that we restrict nature we restrict humanity along with it.

We do all we can to be more than nature. To feel cosmically special, as though we have broken through the canopy of nature’s restrictions. That we have created an oasis inside of nature where Humans can thrive. All we have ever built is a monument to our fear, and have done such a good job, we have mechanized ourselves.

The mental health issues we can detect are often only detectable because they disrupt the quality of being a compliant worker drone. Imagine the human organism screaming out to return to nature. Imagine a biological protest to the status quo.

The demands built into culture churn out a society where severe developmental harm is so common it’s nearly invisible unless it limits the monetary benefit one brings to the system. Everyone has had developmental harm, with no exception. It is rare to see a traumatized animal unless it was done to that animal by humans. Humans are trauma experts. We are the only force that can design systems of trauma. Nature has death and traumatic events, but ongoing existential trauma rare, if it’s even possible at all.

Humans are obsessed with control. We attempt to control every blade of grass in our cities. We attempt to control each other. When our desire for control is not satisfied we become violent. When violence works we crate systems of violence to gain control and dominance over as many humans, plants, animals, rocks, gas, water... anything we can possibly have control over - we want it. So we can get money, which we use to control more elements in our sphere of awareness. Elements we have built to connect are also built to control. We get a dose of connection to keep us engaged, but the systems of connection we have are for profit me work environment will not abandon them and is a reliable replacement for intimate attention. The system does not catch this disorder. That individual would have to noice and seek help. The child who grows up with a developmental issue that leads to an inability to work, would be treated as disgraceful or mentally ill. The system does not notice mental health issues, it notices lack of contribution.

In nature we let go. The less we attempt to gain control over nature the more alive we feel. We feel that way because human control is a denial of the human condition. It is denial that we are nature. When we return to nature we return home. When we go back to our house we return to our avoidance of home. There is a peaceful place between complete vulnerability to the elements of nature and total exertion of control. We are quite far away from that peaceful place. We all know we are, and can feel it each time we visit that home.

The rebellion we need does not need to be in trees but to do things to connect just to connect. To keep asking how our connection with each other can be deeper and more intimate. How can we connect more deeply when we’ve ever imagined? What is the limit of human connection?

I can say one thing for sure; we haven’t come close to the level of connection that is possible. The more we pursue this goal, the more this mechanized world will crumble. The more we will find it largely unnecessary. We will rely less on money. We will accept ourselves and others to a profound degree. Less violence will take place. Violence will seem like a tragic thing our ancestors did to force the nature into compliance. Instead of trying to twist nature into something to possess for the purpose of controlling others, we will accept it is what we are. No one will feel a need to own everything and everyone because deep connection means we are not separate beings fighting for me and mine. Profound connection is seeing everything as us and ours and seeing every mouth one feeds as equally important as their own.