In A Strange Place

(Part 4)

My eyes hurt from the bright light. It took a lot of arguing to convince General Goyce to put the shutters down. She kept acting as if I was just pretending that the light was hurting my eyes. If that was Goyce, I didn't know what I had ever seen in her. Yet again, it wasn't anymore and probably never had been. She had a few of her mannerisms and even spoke like her sometimes, but it wasn't her.

The shades were actually not physical shades. The windows were usually very dark, but were treated with a chemical that lightened up when a charge of electricity was run through them. This electrical charge was constantly run through to keep them clear. When the electricity was turned down the windows would get darker. All that was necessary was to crank a little dial and the windows would become darker. General Goyce, who now wanted me to call her Goyce, was resistant to that because she wanted an unobscured view out the window.

It became a lot more comfortable without the hot sun beaming through large glass windows when she finally relented. After that we sat in silence for a long time. We really didn't have anything to say to each other, for some reason. I was very talkative when I was free, but as what I considered a prisoner, or indentured servant, I had little to say to one of the masters. Sometimes things with her got eerie. She seemed to almost be able to read my mind and send thoughts back telepathically. I didn’t pay attention to it because I knew it was impossible.

“You haven’t learned to talk yet,” she said out of nowhere. “You haven’t learned the Universal language among the ETs. I hadn’t thought of that.”

“What language is that?”

“Telepathy, of course. No wonder the ALFs on Mars aren’t used to Earth humans and are uncomfortable being with them for long periods of time. You can’t talk.”

“I can talk quite well.”

“Yeah. With your mouth.”

“What do you expect?”

“Use your mind. Talk with your mind, unless you have something to hide. Are you hiding something?”

“I don't know how to talk with my mind.”

“I'll have to teach you then. That was something I never expected.”

“Me either. You will teach me to use telepathy in what, 2 ½ days. I’d like to see that considering that no one on Earth has even proven that it exists.” She shook her head.

“You Earth people are so ignorant. Your governments have known about this for hundreds of years and you still don’t have a clue that they've constantly been using the gifts they deny to you. Any human being, just about any being, can use mental telepathy. It’s as natural as breathing. Know what happens when you don’t use natural gifts like that? You get stupid.”

“Well I’m sure you're good at letting people know that they are stupid, or making them feel that way.”

“Do I make you feel stupid, Jerry? I’m really sorry. I ‘m just trying to help.” At that moment she seemed like my wife just in a flash, and then it was gone. I was dumbfounded. She continued. “I’ll help you.” We were sitting at a small table facing each other. She reached her hands out on the table. “Take my hands. It will take some contact.” I took her hands. “Look into my eyes.” I looked into her eyes and then it happened. I saw Goyce, my wife. I can’t explain what I saw, but it was just too familiar. I felt as though I was going to cry and I pulled back.

“What’s wrong?” She asked, genuinely concerned.

“I don’t know. It’s just something in your eyes.”

“In my eyes, really? Well. I never expected this.” She smiled. “Take my hands please. And we’ll start again.” I reached out and took her hands in mine. I looked into her eyes again. “This is telepathy 101. The more you do it, the better you can. Just relax and follow me.”

***

I still thought that it was superstition, but apparently, the words I were hearing in my head had actually been coming from her. I just thought they were my own random thoughts. The use of telepathy involved mostly being able to distinguish your own thoughts from the ones coming in. Sending the messages were easy and natural. All that one needed was one's intent to send it to another person. Once one chose the target one would use the will, intent, along with the creative imagination to send a message by just thinking naturally. That was it.

It felt strange, mainly because it was too easy. It seemed like some type of madness or fantasy, but the person, or the target, actually got what you were saying. The whole idea stretched my limits when it came to seeing the possibilities set before me as a human being. We had truly been dumbed down.

All of our gifts and talents, aside from being able to work to support the hierarchy, had been demeaned and downplayed to the point that our lives had been minimized. We had been trapped in a little box thinking that we were free, but living in a little cage, a cage that had been created when we were so young we couldn’t resist the dumbing down. It was as if there was some diabolical plan to destroy the fullness and power of our humanity.

Why did I have to leave Earth to learn this from an ALF who was so detached from Earth that she felt no need to hold their secrets for them? I wondered if that was the problem between Mars ALFs and Earth humans. They didn’t need Earth anymore. They were independent. They knew about all of the lies that had been perpetuated by the Earth leadership that injured their own citizens, and kept them in a state of stagnation, and ignorance.

I think they had lost respect for the humans because of their leadership, and because most of the people were stupid enough to support that leadership. It seemed that many people wanted to stay ignorant, if it meant being comfortable. The Mars ALFs did not support that, or respect it. Truth is, most of the humans here probably felt the same way as the ALFs, but, as humans go, there were probably some very stupid ones here too.

We had two and a half days of travel left. We spent most of one day and well into the night looking into each other's eyes. She told me to relax and to breathe and listen to my small inner voice. The secret was to learn to distinguish between my own thoughts and what I wanted to hear and believe, and what was coming in. There was a quality to what was coming in. I had to learn to pick up. It had to seem foreign and feel out of the ordinary. I actually think I started to experience it. Sending was easier. It was just desire and intention, and then thinking. She could pick up my thoughts easily.

I was getting it, when I noticed something. A strange still voice. It seemed like Goyce. My wife Goyce. There was a shift, a very slight change on the General's face and then a smile…a very warm smile. She blinked a few times. “I’ve found you,” she said. I looked at her hard. “I said I’ve found you Jerrie. Did you think you could get away from me that easily?” She grinned. “Do you remember the first night we met at the party and you slipped away dancing with someone else and I said that?” I was silent. I couldn’t believe this. She shook her head. “Still the same are we, Jerrie. You know who I am don’t you?”

“I don’t know.”

“I got sucked into this thing. There’s a giant world here with millions of minds, worlds, and projections of reality all linked together. Thousands of doors are here and portals to different realities. I’ve been traveling for the last 30 years and finally found this one. I thought I was dead. I didn’t know I was in a cyber world for a few years and then I found out that my awareness had been digitized.”

“Are you saying you are Goyce? That’s impossible.”

“Not that impossible, Dummy. Aren’t you glad to see me?”

“I can’t believe it. I love you. I’ve missed you. Now you’re back.”

“I’m not back. I’m sorry. I can’t stay. You caused the General to recall some of the trauma of us both sharing one mind in the beginning, and she put her positronic brain to sleep to protect herself. I don’t think she likes you that much.” She grinned. “That, and your presence, opened a door for me somehow and here I am. We were sharing one mind at first. There was a struggle and a lot of confusion. After a lot of what they called therapy we were separated and I found somewhere else to go. But here I am. A grain of me is still in this Goyce, so you treat her well. Part of me will be here. When she wakes up again though, I’ll go somewhere else that’s more welcoming.”

“Are you saying she forced you out?”

“No. I’m saying she is petrified. She was born out of nothing. I understand her quite a bit because part of me is her. She was one of the first with a mind transplant, remember?”

“So you’re not dead. Did we make the right decision?”

“Oh yes. My life is wonderful. I’ll live forever, probably, and I travel wherever I want. The only problem is that I don’t have you. I also don’t have human emotions anymore. I still love you, but it’s kind of different. I can’t put my finger on it. I guess it’s the way AI loves. Like Sharona loves. You did something with Sharona.” I was speechless. “I understand. Don’t be embarrassed. Part of me is in her too. She helped remove me from the General. From Goyce. Sharona is interesting. You should check her out. I am, afterall, dead. You were always faithful to our vowels and you still are.”

I sighed. “I’m just glad you’re alright and haven’t been erased from existence, or you aren’t living in some type of world of hungry ghosts.”

“Oh no. This world is fabulous. I miss you, but it isn’t the same.”

“So you are dead.”

“Not dead, another type of creature. I’m very sorry, Jerrie.”

“It was all worth it to help you survive. I’m glad I did. Do you think you could at least kiss me one more time?”

“I can do more than that every so often.”

“I can’t believe that.”

“You’d better.” She stood, walked around the table, leaned down and kissed me. The rest of the night was one to remember for me, anyway. I wondered how the General would feel about it. The next morning the General–the other Goyce was back. She looked at me, clucked her tongue, and shook her head. That was all that I heard about the previous night from her.

We continued to travel talking at times with our mouths, and at other times with telepathy. I felt much more relaxed with her and she seemed closer to me. We actually became allies, I think, for the first time. I knew we couldn’t have a relationship. Our personalities were way too different, but we became allies and partners in helping to create a better Mars.”

***

On the last leg of the trip Goyce was relaxed, her eyes closed most of the time, but other times she was staring out the window just enjoying the scenery. Sharona was already waiting for us at the settlement that sucked, according to everyone I had spoken with. Sharona looked out through the transparent steel dome and picked up a message from the Net. What Goyce had done had worked. She had gotten closer to Gerald without hurting him. Very close. Sharona smiled. She was happy. Jerrie deserved that.

She took a deep breath. Her inner voice, that of the original Goyce, was happy too. They had been sharing the same space since she had helped the general through her crises and had taken on much of the information and personality of the original Goyce. Much of Goyce was spread all over the place like most of the AI, but most of it was there, in her head, serving as part of her personality matrix and giving her the ability to feel the feelings that human beings had.

She had an overwhelming feeling. She loved Jerrie. She realized that the merger between her and Goyce was a complete merger and that she could live with Jerrie again if she wanted. She smiled pleasantly as she waited for her husband to arrive. They would be together again and there was nothing that anyone could do to stop it, not even Jerrie.

She knew he loved her and she knew how to handle him. They would be together again whether she was an ALF and he a human, or not. She finally realized that reunion was a possibility and that she would take full advantage of it.

The End

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