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Enter Cancer

by E. E. Spencer 2 months ago in astronomy

I Feel

Enter Cancer
Photo by Nathan Anderson on Unsplash

I was in middle school when I first read about the crab. Another love-struck preteen, unsure of who they are, let alone what they wanted. Logically, I had turned to my ancient desktop. On a mission for answers, my stubby fingers plugged away at the keys. My ‘soul searching’ lead me straight to the world of horoscopes and the mystifying thing called astrology. My heart raced at the prospect of answers. I hovered my cursor over the search result reading Horoscope.com. What did I have to lose?

I was brought to a white webpage covered in odd symbols and bright colors I was puzzled. Even after reading up on definitions and Q&As alike, this seemed more like magic than reality. So it was no surprise I dismissed the concept as crazy. How could something as small as my birth date determine so much about me? After all, there are only 12 signs and a few billion people. Even my bad middle school logic knew that math didn’t add up. How would it work anyway, I was born a month early? Did that mean my star sign would be off?

Enter Cancer.

Born in the mid-July heat, I was quickly led to the crab symbol. A sign ruled by the moon, guarded on the outside and soft in the center. Almost eight years have passed since that fateful google search and ever since I have sworn by the title of Cancer.

Don’t get me wrong, this sign is as bittersweet as ice cream is to the lactose intolerant. Yes, it is sooooo good going down, but the stomach aches afterward… it can be scary, to say the least.

Cancers sound great in theory. We can be loyal, intuitive, kind, and creative. We bare our hearts to those we love and create deep lasting connections with our friends and family. After all, we can be as sweet as ice cream.

But sometimes we can give you a serious stomach ache instead. With our loyal, protective nature, we can become jealous and needy in our relationships. We’re admittingly oversensitive at times and will let our emotions build up until we burst. When we don’t get our way, well, we get moody. Or if we feel threatened, we might retreat into our shells. Because as sweet as we can be, what happens on the inside isn’t always as pretty.

Yet, much like dairy, I still love being a cancer even if it can suck at times.

I am a cancer through a through. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I fall in love fast and hard. Once I’m hooked, I’m ready to dedicate my whole being to you. Whether you’re a friend, family, a pet, or a romantic interest. I want nothing more than to protect, love, and nurture those I care about.

Sure, I get a little emotional sometimes. I cry over stupid things like book characters dying or at the end of sappy romantic comedies. I get jealous when someone flirts with the guy I like. I get moody when I don’t get the seat on the couch I want. I’ll spend hours watching soulmate tarot readings and daydreaming about my perfect match. Or if you lie to me and try to be ingenuine, I know it. If something is bothering me, I’ll bottle it away so no one worries. So when my shell finally cracks, I cry about dumb stuff until I feel better.

But you know what? In the end, I love it. I feel. I am a cancer, the water sign written in my stars. A cosmic crab. That’s who I am, so why not learn to love it?

astronomy
E. E. Spencer
E. E. Spencer
Read next: Understanding the Collective Intelligence of Pro-opinion
E. E. Spencer

An aspiring writer and artist looking for an escape from my day job.

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