Eléni & M Move to Athens - Part 37

This new series has its history in the form of several short stories, several poems, and a 13-part series that is linked at the bottom via Part 36 of this series. Anthi Psomiadou has agreed wholeheartedly to play the role of a fictional character also called, Anthi, starting in the first series, but with the name, Anthi Kanéna, in this 99-part series (or 100), which she chose herself to add some spirited intrigue. O Anthi! “Yes, M!” How tall are you? “Why do you want to know my height?” I was just wondering if you were taller than Anthi Kanéna.

Deep in my subterranean cells, my five senses labor; they weave and unweave space and time, joy and sorrow, matter and spirit. Nikos Kazantzakis

We did not sleep more than a couple of hours during our first real night together. It was a period of carnal discovery, but our love ruled over our lust throughout this lighted night, except for our brief dream where our lust wore an entirely sexual attire in the form of raw, wet, pounding nakedness, yet barely surpassing our desires to become one when awake. I wanted to be part of Anthi, and Anthi wanted to be part of me. We wanted to merge and never disconnect again. I felt her becoming my flesh. Anthi kept screaming my name, petitioning me to never let her go. How can I ever? I will follow you everywhere, whether it is high or low, hot or cold, even where the flying roaches roam. By Zeus, I even said that. To hell with my phobia! For my Anthi, I will even look at one and call it cute. I cannot believe that I just wrote that. I must be in love. I am. I am in love with you, my Anthi. You are my meaning of life. You are the one I have been searching for all my life.

“O my heart! O my soul! O my mind! All three were yours from my first yesterday and will be yours until my last tomorrow. I adore you, my love. How did I live without you before? When you sought me, I sought you. When you cried for me, I cried for you. When you were mad at this world, I was discovering a better one. When you wanted to give up, I wanted you to stand tall. When your words spoke of pain, I felt it with you. When you laughed at the world, I laughed uncontrollably with you. You complete me, even when I think that I am whole. When you touch me, I never want you to let go. Your hands upon my skin feel like the morning Sun. Your tongue always soothes my heart. Your flag always makes me prouder to be Greek, since you always call the gods and goddesses, but especially our Athena, and thank them for me. You who cannot believe, believes in them and me. Je t’aime, mon M. Je ne veux jamais de perdre (I love you, my M. I never want to lose you).”

While moving to and fro against each other, our steam both formed and evaporated with every thrust, our eyes looked at each other with unfathomed intensity, our mouths kissed any available skin, our hands held every protruding part, as if blindness had struck us within our heads. I wanted to disappear within Anthi and become a new organ, a symbiotic bit. My soul was never enough. I wanted her to have all my essence, to absorb all my experience, to add me to what she was and will be. I never felt such love for another being. I loved her more than whatever I thought that I was. My life was in her hands, yet she put hers in mine. Our sacrifice would have been in vain since we felt the same all-encompassing need to belong to one another, not as an object, not as a thing. We saw ourselves in each other. I felt my soul for the first time. I felt Anthi’s soul merging with mine. We had become one. One plus one can only be one when love is transcended beyond spacetime.

What could we dream about when our reality was so complete? We dreamt the impossible, of course. I wanted to meet Nietzsche and Anthi wanted to meet Kazantzakis. I wanted to hug Charlie Chaplin and Anthi wanted to hug Janis Joplin. I did too. I wanted to thank Freud and Anthi wanted to thank the universe. She won there. I went for the individual. She went for the whole. But the whole is made of individuals. Thinking about it now, as I write about it, I realize that such a whole without my Anthi could never be whole at all. She makes it whole. One missing individual renders the whole incomplete. Anthi is my whole. Anthi is everything. Oblivion is preferable to any whole that did not include her.

I looked at her upon waking up and could not believe that she was there sleeping by my side. I was sleeping with Anthi and Anthi was sleeping with me. I counted her toes again. It calms me to do so. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. I love you all. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. I love you as much as the other ones. I kissed them one by one, counting them again. Anthi opened her eyes, smiling like the Sun. Anthi was my sun. Her radiation nourished me. Her heat warmed my soul, now that I had one. Her rays caressed my being. I never felt happier in my entire life, which brought a flood of tears. What did you expect? Laughter? But they were tears of joy, tears of happiness. I was happy to be alive because Anthi was there, looking at me with her honey eyes, also tearful, as we both realized that we were going to live together for the rest of our lives.

It was time to return to Athens and start our lives together. Athena was already aware of our whole. She had opened our eyes. She had showed us a path, allowing us to take it at our pace. Athena was a true Goddess; not one as those invented by humans throughout history and all over the world. Athena was the ultimate guide, both loving and wise, beautiful both outside and inside. Athena was worthy of all our aspirations. Athena was Athens and Athens was Athena. Athena was Greece and Greece was Athena. Athena was the world and the world was Athena. We will have to love her over and over again, so she will never leave to sleep again for thousands of years. We need Athena in our world. We need Athena. We need her.

The first thing that I did when I saw her downstairs was to kiss her on the mouth. Patrick looked surprised. What a prick! I love you, my Athena, and I will love you always. We all love you, so please never leave. Delphine will love you, I said to everyone, kissing the girl’s forehead. Everyone that meets you will love you. We will take you everywhere, and everyone who sees you will love you. Everyone loves you, our Athena. How could they not? I then kissed and hugged Grandpa and Grandma and told them that Anthi and M, I mean me, will be together from now on. They were even happier than I expected. It seems that the sweet girl had told them about her cheating father. I did not say anything about Eléni, since she invented, being such a stellar narrator, that she was a lesbian and preferred women over men. I almost exploded in laughter. What a babe she was and always will be! Eléni and M did move to Athens, but now it had become, Anthi and M in Athens, with Delphine, of course. She was going to be my daughter. I was hoping, however, to be called M and not Dad. M sounded like me. I was M, the man who adored flowers.

Next, I did something unexpected.

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Thank you, Anthi Psomiadou, for making me wander from A to A, from adventure to adventure, from Anthi to Anthi, from the real to the fictitious, and vice versa. While always being kind and supportive, you are both special and singular, from S to S, from season to season, from spacetime to spacetime. Anthi, je ne t’ai pas menti (I did not lie to you).

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