Capricorn

Hey y'all!

I got an alert on my phone from Chani. The moon entered Capricorn! It always surprises me how quickly the moon moves, what new energy it brings into my life. I'm an earthy babe, so let's just say I NEEDED this change more than a little.

Now is the time for radical rest and strategic wonderings. What if the way you've been looking at your most recent dilemmas can be adjusted slightly? Reframing our own perspectives is the best tool we have when we wake up on the wrong side of the bed or are stumped by a moral, career, or relationship decision on the horizon.

Sometimes I feel that I am Channeling the powers of another

Greater self I do not know, Have never and will never

Know. In the morning I read One poem written by someone

Great and wonder why Anyone cares about things,

Goes to work, stops at the cafe To grab a cup with a lid, sucks

Liquid and steam between their lips

And into their empty mouths, swallowing.

The warmth burrows down their throats And chests. No, it is not enough

For me but I drink two mugs Of coffee a day as if it means

Something, from a large mug That says CAPRICORN on it.

Another small piece of me, that car- Ing, studied and stolen from some-

One great. Arriving on time

In the morning, another. Saying

Hello and looking them

In the eyes. Saying today—

Today is a great, great day.

I wrote this incantation under a Capricorn moon in 2018 while I was working as a Marine Engineer on a seismic research vessel. I loved my job, my coworkers, and staring at the ocean but I was handling undiagnosed/unacknowledged mental health and post-child abuse issues. Some days I didn't know how I would get through the day. Starting my day by chugging two HUGE mugs of coffee, reading one poem by someone I was studying as I taught myself poetry, and plastering a smile on my face helped me show up in the morning as the shipmate I wanted to be: I walked into the engine room beaming off a caffeine high saying, "Guess what? Today... is gonna be a GREAT DAY!" Taking a moment to decide how to look at the world and how I could fit into it for the day completely shifted my perspective.

(Of course, quitting my job to face my mental health/trauma issues more directly and resetting my priorities was ultimately what was needed--not a temporary change in perspective. If dealing with serious issues, please seek appropriate care. Some resources can be accessed here.)

"It's gonna be a great, great day!" I didn't make that mantra up. I stole it from Mark E. Miller on Youtube! I had recently started studying astrology because people I admired were interested in it. I studied poems written by people I didn't know in order to learn how to write, how to be a poet, how to be who I aspired to be. I was self-conscious that following my interests, hobbies, and personal goals in this way made me disingenuous.

Reader, it didn't! It's normal and healthy to self-examine the way you present yourself to the world. The poem also deals with the ways I personally perform identity, gender, functionality: I patchwork myself together. We all absorb, decide, lean towards, hope for different pieces of ourselves. Claiming these parts of ourselves is powerful, and doesn't make us any less ourselves.

The moon in in Capricorn.

Even if you can't see her, she is there.

Find a sidewalk that has been heated by the sun.

Sit on the hot white ground. Feel it simmer into the fabric of your garments.

Think about daymoon. Can you find her? Even if you can't see her, she is there.

Return your attention to your legs. Sit straight, with your spine reaching from the concrete up to the daymoon. Reach your finger tips as high as you can, relaxing your shoulders away from your ears.

Exhale and fold at the waist over your legs, allowing gravity to hold your hands on the floor alongside them or grab your feet. While you ease into deeper levels of skin, fascia, skeleton, muscle: Add the numbers of your birth month, day, and 5 (numerology coefficient for the year 2021) in your head. Add the two digits of your answer to each other, and hold this lucky number on your tongue.

example:

Dec + 24 + 5

12 + 24 + 5 = 41

4 + 1 = 5

On an inhale, release your stretch, plant your feet into the ground and stand. Ensure your pelvic floor is parallel to the ground and energize your arms towards the concrete, palms forward.

Say your lucky number aloud. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

Take a deep breath, and end the ritual. How do you want to move forward with your day, now that you've had a chance to reconnect with your body? The concrete under your feet should feel a little cooler than when you started. The heat is inside you, now.

Good luck, be safe, and eat well!

Love, Joe.