World in Tatters Ch 31

Richard and I silently walk back to camp, my head swirling with thoughts of my mother.

Alice rushes me as soon as she sees me. She tries to pull me aside, but I brush her off. I cross the camp to the rest of my crew. Jason sees my pensive expression and nods to me. He has always had a knack for reading me. Knowing when to press me for answers and when to leave well enough alone. Rachel on the other hand knows, but always asks anyway. Luckily, she and Chris seem to be getting some well-deserved shut eye.

I sit, leaning against a nearby tree. I twirl my mother’s ring around between my fingers. My mind far from here. Alice plops down in front of me, clearly getting impatient about our situation. “What are we still doing here?” She hisses under her breath.

I barely register that she’s said anything.

“Are you even listening to me?”

I hear her this time. “No. Not really.” I look up, flashing her a quick smile. “Sorry. You should really get some rest. I’ll keep watch.”

Alice finally notices my dark mood. “Are…are you okay?”

“I’ll be fine. Just…please go get some rest. We’ve had a long few days.” Looking back at the ring in my hand, “And I doubt tomorrow will be any easier.”

“Maybe you should sleep too?”

Huffing, “I don’t think I could if I tried.”

“Fine. But I’m staying right here.” I feel a half-smile cross my lips as Alice curls up against my tree.

It doesn’t take long for sleep to overtake her, no matter how hard she tries to fight it. Unfortunately, I am not so lucky. My mind races for hours going through every memory I have of my mother.

By the time the sun begins its ascent, I’ve made my decision. As Alice and the others stir in the waxing light, I loop my mother’s ring back on the chain. I hang it around my neck, tucking it under my shirt.

By sunrise, Richard and Kiera’s people have all their gear packed and ready to move out. While my crew are still gathering themselves, I go to Richard, letting him know my plans. Looking back, I see that Alice has gathered the other three around the trunks full of our supplies. I lower my head, resolved. I cross back to the trunks, drawing everyone’s attention.

“Alright, y’all. Listen up.” Rachel looks up at me confused and obviously offended at how I addressed them. “Here’s the thing. I’m…I’m leaving with Richard and his people.”

“What? Why?” Rachel barks in disbelief.

“The person who sent them to find us has the answers we’ve been after.”

“O…kay…but you said that you’re going with them. Which implies you’re leaving the rest of us behind.”

“Yeah. That’s right.” A flash of anger crosses Rachel’s eyes. “Look, we don’t know Richard. Or Kiera. Or the people he works for. I’m not putting the rest of you in that position.”

“Then why the hell are you going!?”

“Because this is something I have to do. I can’t really explain it.” I turn to Jason, who up until now, has kept his expression neutral. “Jason, I would like you to take everyone somewhere safe. Hide out until I come find you.” Peering down at Chris, “You, Chris, could go home. You’re free. We’re less than a day away. You should go back to your mom. Family’s important. Take one of the horses.”

“You’re joking, right?” Chris just stares blankly at me, completely incredulous. “Steven, I…”

“You’re not going with them alone.” Jason interjects. “Look, I don’t understand why you think you have to do this, but I’m certain you have your reasons. The thing is, I’m going with you. And it appears that the others agree with my sentiment.”

“Uh, not me!” Alice pipes up. “I think you’re being stupid. I don’t know them, I don’t trust them…”

“Well, I do.”

“Clearly. Hence the part about you being stupid.”

“Fair enough. But I am going. If you don’t want to go, you don’t have to.” Turning to the others, “Same goes for all of you.”

“Well, I’m going. If only so you don’t get yourself killed.” With that, Alice storms off, swiping up her pack.

“I’ve already said my piece.” Jason mutters.

“Steven…you guys have helped me out so much. I owe you.” Chris hesitates.

“You don’t owe any of us anything. Full stop.” I insist.

“Still. I would like to go with you. If that’s okay.”

“Chris…You should go home. I’m glad we were able to help each other, but…”

“Please. I’d like to help you see this through.”

“Alright. If you insist.” I concede, turning to Rachel, “Rach…”

Before I can say anything else, my sister gets up in my face. With the way her nostrils flare and jaw sets, she looks just like our mom. Without warning, she rears back and slugs my arm, hard as she can.

“Ow.”

Jason and Chris both crack smiles as Rachel goes about gathering her gear.

Once we have our things packed, Jason and I load the trunks back into Richard’s wagon. The others decide to mount up and ride alongside the company. I, on the other hand, figure that rest is in order. I load up in the wagon with the trunk, lying down with my pack as a pillow. I lay there for what feels like hours, tossing and turning against the rattling of the carriage.

At some point, I decide to give up on sleep, pulling out my mother’s journal instead. I sit up, bracing against one of the trunks, and peer down at the leather tome. My fingers trace the lines on the cover, my thoughts twisting in my head.

Could it really be true? Could my mother really be alive? Five years separated with not even an inkling of hope, and now a near-stranger shows up with her wedding ring.

Five years, and I have never read any of what my mother wrote in this journal. It always felt wrong. But now, I… I slowly open the journal. The pages creak as I flip through the entries. I feel my heart catch in my throat.

I pick an entry from eight years ago and begin reading.

“Steven and I spent the day together today. It was an enjoyable day. The air cool with a nice breeze. Perfect opportunity for training.”

I think remember that day.

“Steven and I went to the woods outside the city. Nora, as usual decided to send one of her guards out with us, even though I insisted we would be fine without. I guess it makes sense, though. There’s been some unrest in the area. Bandit attacks have become an almost weekly occurrence. At any rate, we had no incident today. I think Steven has made good progress with his orienteering.

I thumb through a few more pages. This entry is from about a month later.

“Another attack was reported today. Nora says she’s beginning to suspect something other than bandits. The attacks are too organized. Too precise. Methodical even. They’re only attacking militia targets and fleeing as soon as reinforcements arrive. It’s like someone is testing the city’s defenses, or maybe the response times. Nora’s getting worried. I’ve been calling for action, but Parliament just doesn’t listen.”

I turn to another entry, a couple months later.

“The attacks are becoming more frequent. Three in as many days. Whoever they are, they’ve moved away from solely attacking the militia. Several crop caravans have been hit and captured. Coordinated attacks. With all these attacks and this drought, the city is beginning to experience a food shortage. The people are getting restless. The hungrier they are, the worse it’s going to get.”

I thumb a few more pages. The entry is from only a few days prior to our departure from Atlanta.

“This drought is getting worse and worse by the day. Luckily, it appears the attacks have stopped. At least for now. I can’t imagine why, though. If their goal is to take the city, now would be their best chance. The people are hungry. Nora has resorted to rationing. Including her own household. Even so, protests and riots are happening every day. In her capacity as Alliance President, Nora has asked Milton and I to travel west, try to establish some sort of trade agreement. Something… Anything to get grain and food. We’ll be leaving soon. It’s going to be a rough journey, especially with the children. Nora fears that whoever sent the raiders won’t take too kindly to such an agreement, but she thinks that it’s a necessary risk. Frankly, I think it’s a waste of time. It’ll take too long. By then, the city will have fallen. We should be tracking down the attackers and dealing with the threat. I admit the drought is still a problem, but Nora should have sent someone else. I’m more useful here in Atlanta.”

That’s the last substantial entry for a while. Besides some descriptions of interesting landscapes or meeting strangers on the road, my mother didn’t write much about the journey. For the most part, it seems like I remembered: uneventful. That is, until we made it to Kansas City…

“Jason is getting antsy. This is the third major city we’ve been to trying to make Nora’s trade deal. Still no luck. Milton, the eternal optimist, says we should keep going. Move on. Kansas City was our best bet. They have the largest grain crop south of Canada. And since Canada’s borders are closed tight, there’s no way they’ll help. No one wants to work with what they see as a dying city-state. They don’t see the benefit for themselves.”

Another entry a week later.

“Another city. Another dead end. We’re running out of options. We keep going farther and farther west. At this point, I fear Seattle might be our only viable option…If we can even make it there in one piece. The kids still don’t know the true intent of our travels. Milton didn’t want them to worry about their Aunt Nora or Alice or any of the others we had to leave behind. It’s not their burden to bear. We’ve been on the road for what seems like forever. Setback after setback. I’m beginning to fear for my friend, but her administration’s inaction brought about the majority of their troubles.”

The next entry is from our time in Seattle.

“I haven’t been able to write for a while. Too much has been happening. We’ve been in Seattle for about a week. I think we’re making some headway toward a deal, but the process is slow-going. The kids don’t seem to like it here. I can’t blame them, really. It’s pretty dreary. I don’t think it’s stopped raining for more than an hour since we got here. Luckily it seems we’re on track to leave here soon enough.”

I flip a few more pages.

“Three months. We’ve been in Seattle for three long months. We’ve been able to finalize the trade deal at long last. We leave for our long return journey tomorrow. The first grain shipment follows in a week. We’ll ride harder and faster than they can. Barring any real problems, we should make it back to Alliance territory within a couple months. The shipment should arrive just in time for winter.”

How had I not put any of this together back then? I mean… I was thirteen or fourteen at the time. I wasn’t stupid. But all of them were able to keep the mission a secret from me. Even after all these years, Jason hasn’t said a word about it. He clearly knew, so why has he never said anything? As I continue on, I can feel anxiety quickening my heart. I’m getting close to the end now. I turn the page, hesitating before I read the next entry.

“We’ve only been back on the road for a couple of weeks. But this morning, there was an incident. We lost some supplies, but nothing too detrimental to our journey. The problem is, I don’t think that it was an accident. I think we’re being tracked. For days now, it’s felt like someone is watching us from the shadows. I hope I’m just being paranoid, but I could swear that the bridge was sabotaged. Who would be following us? Why? I really wish I knew. When I shared my concerns with Milton and Jason, they agreed that something felt off. I fear someone wishes to stop us from reaching our destination.”

Followed? Tracked? By whom? My mother’s words begin to lend context to some of my memories. Context that I have been sorely lacking for years. That entry reminded me of my dream from the other day. I never did get the chance to ask Jason about it. With everything that happened with Rolo and Butch and Luther, I’d almost forgotten. I turn to the next entry, my heart racing. No matter how hard it is to read, I can’t look away now. The last entry. It’s dated the last day I saw my mother.

“As soon as we were sure we were being followed, we changed our route. We tried to lose them. I think we did for a while. They found us again. This time they made contact with me. The man was a soldier. He said he knew of my connection to the Alliance and Nora. He said he knew about our mission, of our deal with Seattle. He said they can’t let us go back. I’m not sure who he works for yet, but he said for us to meet him tonight to work something out or they’d kill us all. I don’t see much choice in the matter. I’m going to meet him. Milton and Jason are going to back me up from a distance.

“I don’t know if we’ll come back from this alive, but I couldn’t tell the kids. I couldn’t face them knowing it might be the last time I see them. If something does happen to me, or to Milton, I know that Steven will look after Rachel. He’s learned well.”