Within Your Pages; My Dreams
A response to my journal & looking forward with Vocal
Dear Journal,
Hello, it has been some time, hasn't it?
It is as you say, the previous year was agony, but as time marches on in that steady way that it does, I can't help but be pulled along its currents and look forward to the new horizons before me.
It's been difficult to approach you as so many of my thoughts written into your pages haven't been about dreams, but nightmares; never ending darkness hunting me through the paths of life, and the bright spots I tried to cling to with all my might.
But there are dreams there too. Ones both old and new. Even now my dreams feel like they constantly shift - not transforming - molding into familiar shapes until it feels reachable.
And that's something I've come to learn from my triumphs, however small, that I did have. My dreams can be touched, if briefly. It's given me a taste of what I'm capable of and what I now believe I can achieve.
Yet, I cannot bring myself to write in your pages just yet. Maybe a part of me feels like I haven't done enough to earn your awe, your praise - your admiration. But I shall try. I shall try my hardest to be worthy.
So, wait for me. I will meet you along my path once our destinies intertwine once more, and when I can finally greet your pages again without a single tear to shed.
With love,
Amanda
________
You can read the first part of the Journal Duology here:
About the Creator
Amanda Starks
Lover of the dark, fantastical, and heart-wrenching. Fantasy writer, poet, and hopefully soon-to-be novelist who wants to create safe spaces to talk about mental health. Subscribe to my free newsletter at www.amandastarks.com for updates!
Comments (2)
The most attractive part in your story was the topic, for me!!!
Stream of consciousness is an interesting way to journal. But there are dreams there too. Ones both old and new. Even now my dreams feel like they constantly shift - not transforming - molding into familiar shapes until it feels reachable. This is very real, and relatable. Thanks for sharing.