Trapped Inside

This trip was just a distraction. I'm aware of that. My parents would have never taken me to this place if they didn't feel like I had to just get out of the house at that very second. The day was hectic. Hell. Life's been hectic. Mom found out. Next was dad. I knew dad would find out eventually, even if mom tried her very hardest to keep it from him. Dad always finds out.

My eyes glossed over towards the giant glass seperating me from all the small fishes swimming around on the other side; unsure whether or not they'd ever see anything else past the giant tank they've been placed inside of. Maybe they were placed inside, taken from the big world of wonder that they once called home. Or maybe they were born here; born into a life of uncertainty. Born into a life where they'd never learn what lays just beyond the walls of the tank. Is life out there as easy as it is in here? Or is life in here worse off than it is out there?

I looked back over towards my mom and dad. Mom was still trying to console dad, her arm still placed on his forearm the way it always is whenever she wants him to calm back down. She always managed to purse her lips together in a shushing motion as if to remind him not to say something bad. The number one reason as to why mom takes dad to a public place in the first place. He can't just speak his mind when other strangers and children are running about the place; potential witnesses to whatever dad may have planned to do in the first place.

"We can't control what others decide to do." Mom had been telling dad over and over since he first found out. Every time something bad happens, that has always been my mom's go-to line. We can't control the decisions of others. I've been hearing that since I could last remember. So has dad. Although, even if I'm only ten, I can tell dad hates hearing it. I won't lie. So do I. Can't control what others do? My eyes looked back over at the fishes swimming on the other side of the glass. Would you tell them that? If it was up to them, they'd probably be swimming around in the great blue sea; exploring wherever whenever they wanted.

My eyes followed the fishes as they swam around; unsure where they were but looking so happy doing whatever it was they were doing. Some stayed low to the ground, slowly moving or not even moving at all, while others actively flown through the waters as fast as their flippers could take them. Some fishes stayed in their own schools, while others fled off on their own; almost as if they weren't scared of what was ahead.

I focused my eyes back on my parents. They now sat on a bench behind me, not looking towards me but instead looking towards each other. Mom had her hands folded over dads by now. She had this look of sorrow in her eyes as if she was pleading for his kindness to come back out. They both finally shot a glance over at me; their eyes looking as sorry as ever.

This trip was just a distraction. I'm aware of that. I am. My parents would have never taken me here if they didn't feel I needed to get out of that house as that very second. The day was hectic. The week, even. Hell. Life has been hectic. Who would've known that after just three months mom would find out. Then dad. Gosh. Dad. I hope he isn't too mad at me for allowing this to happen. I was just being nice to the family friend. I didn't know he wanted to be with me in that way. Honest, dad. Honest. When mom found out, I begged for her not to tell dad. I couldn't even face the fact that I let someone do to me what he did.

My eyes looked back at all the fishes swimming behind the glass. Trapped inside. Stuck with no idea whether or not you'll finally be able to escape this hell. No clue how long you have to endure this battle, or if anyone else would ever help you break free. My eyes followed the fishes once more until I couldn't catch another breath. In. Out. In. My eyes swelled up. My face began burning. What comes after in? Oh god. I tried to scream but all that could come out was water. I began tapping on the glass, trying to avert my parents' attention off each other. In. Out. In. My fists banged on the glass as people walked past, admiring all that the aquarium had to offer. Banging. Harder. Soon I felt as if I had been choking. Life felt as if it was being drained from my soul the more I banged on the glass. Fishes swam all around me; some grouped with others, while others stuck by themselves.

Soon enough, the fishes faded, and I was left all alone. My parents nowhere to be seen. The lights seemed as if they had been shut off. All but one. A spotlight. Shined on just one person. Him. The man who started all this. He placed on hand on the glass, smiling at me with that kind smile that melts all hearts.

"Don't tell a soul," He whispered towards me, "You don't want to find out what I'm capable of."

A chill had been sent down my spine. Oh God. What the hell did I just do?