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The Power of Painting in Year 3,000 Part 9

Part 9

By Patrick OlesonPublished 2 years ago 17 min read
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Original illustration by Patrick Oleson

A shadowy deviant looks curiously upon frosted bliss. He’s been looking deep into the frozen pond for a minute there, I wonder… Is he checking himself out? It must be hard being a Cona Vight, with no real facial features or anything like that. How different is each Cona Vight?

“BULLOCKS, WHAT NONSENSICAL SORCERY. HUMANS HAVE DEVELOPED TELEPATHIC COMMUNICATION TOO, IT SEEMS. ENOUGH OF THIS FROZEN PIECE OF GARBAGE... I MUST FIND THE SOURCE,” the pessimistic 1/5 of Corvak yelled out. He swiped at his fluctuating head for a moment.

The Cona Vight turned around, made quite the frightened gesture for a minute, and then caught his guard again.

“OH, MY DARKNESS! HOW UGLY?! SHEESH, YOU ALL COULD USE A NICE SHADOW BATH EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE. YOU MUST BE THE ONES TELLING ME ‘TO GET AWAY FROM YOUR LAKE’. WELL, I DON’T THINK YOU’LL ENJOY MY RESPONSE BUT ITS TIME TO FEEL MY KINGSHIP. GET READY TO FEEL SQUEEZED FROM THE INSIDE, RATS. I’LL TAKE ALL OF YOU DOWN IN AN INSTANT,” the great, pompous Corvak stated.

Augusto fired up some buttons for me, shot them my way and I rode them straight towards the jerk ahead of us. I pulled out one broom and held it, old-school samurai style. Focusing on making a huge mark, the buttons took me right where I needed to go and I released a huge mark-blast as I swung down my almighty broom.

*PWOOOOOOSSHHHHHH*

A glorious wave of light came crashing out of my broom and took the Cona Vight down.

“AHH!!! NO, THIS MUST BE THE BLASTED WEAPON THAT TOOK MY OTHER FIFTH DOWN. OH BY THE DARK-SIDE THIS BURNS,” the helpless Cona Vight squealed.

Italia pointed out, “Actually no, that was my cake! But I’m glad you at least had a piece of it, before biting the dust!”

Hmmm… He hasn’t imploded or anything, maybe he has some energy left in the tank. It’s best if I finish him off before he can retaliate.

I walked up closer and then all of a sudden, a stroke of darkness sniped the Cona Vight.

“WHA-?! NO, HOW DARE YOU DO THIS! THIS IS TREASON,” Corvak yelled out…but to who?

All of a sudden, it looked like the Cona Vight got sucked into himself and then the stroke shot towards trees to the other side of the lake.

What… was that? It seems that something else did the job for us but… This is not leaving a good feeling in my stomach.

A confused troll hidden in some bushes close by started sweating bullets.

“Oh crap! What in the name of Gameshark, just happened?! No one’s ever taken one of those loser’s down so easily, and what the hax was that stroke that appeared so suddenly?! I might have to sit tight for a moment until they finally give up looking for me,” Belcheezius worriedly said to himself.

In a tree across the pond, Vincent waited with a massive grin-like feature where his face would be… if he had one. The power of yet another 1/5 of Corvak surged through his body making him bigger and denser in darkness.

“This is all working great. Humans really have created a wonderful tactic of approaching matters at hand, improv. Thanks to the changes in the will of man, I can finally achieve my dreams and do what the mother-mold of all Darkness originally intended. Let’s see how far we can take this… Oh, that’s right I should dance with the troll for the time being,” whispered the malicious, plotting Vincent.

Vincent sent off a couple of particles of himself and they flew towards Belcheezius. The particles landed and sat on his shoulders.

“AH-HACK AH-HACK! What the… It suddenly got a bit tougher to breathe,” a stuffy Belcheezius said to himself in his cozy bush.

A shining CJ stated, “Okay, I just finished collecting all of my dandelion-chlorophyll reserves. What made you say that I needed to do this, Nina?”

“Oh… I hope I’m wrong, but the integers are calculating that something big is headed our way. We’re going to need all of the support and power we can get,” 3.14 stated alarmedly.

CJ turned to me and put one of his branches on me all buddy-buddy like. He then began to walk away from the pond, taking me with him.

“Where are you impotent, infidels going,” the ticked off cogbot questioned.

“Don’t worry Nina, we’ll be right back. I swear it on Mother Nature’s heart. I just wanted to talk to pops over here for a second, mano y mano. Catch my drift? We’ll just be a moment,” the persuasive CJ reaffirmed.

“Okay. Whatever, loser. Just be quick,” 3.14 stated in annoyance.

CJ grabbed me, put me on his Ancient pompadour and caught some distance from the group.

CJ said, “Listen pops, there was something I forgot to mention to you. Us Ancients also require water but as you’ve seen, I’m different than most. I collect and absorb water every time that I battle the God of the Sea. In fact, just absorbing water used to be the main reason why I would go into the sea, now I just collect it in passing while focusing on battling my guy over there. I’ve collected so much water that it’s not even necessary for me to take a dip in the sea anymore, but I do it anyways because that body of water is my stage. Nina always watches me go into a bout and she was the first to see us go for it. She’s my biggest cheerleader, so I go through the good fight in order to give her the greatest show.”

I started looking at CJ like a puppy dog. Awww I feel like I’m listening to the greatest crush sequence in some sort of dystopian fiction, I thought.

CJ noticed my look; making a bigger smirk than usual and continued, “I love that little cogbot more than anything. She was the first to calculate that the God of the Sea would be there, and I was the first to throw her calculations off. Haha! She thought I was going to lose in the first bout with the old boy over there but, she never predicted that it would end up being a tie. Now, listen pops. As a man… no matter what you have to face ahead of you, you should ALWAYS do your best and give it all up for the lady. I guess Ako has rubbed off on me in that sense. A man should always keep in mind, the importance of self-sacrifice. Sometimes that means you need to be completely okay with being in a state of turbulence, we must be the foundation that grounds the queens around us. There’s a reason why I’m bringing all of this up now though, okay pops? Not once has Nina ever told me that I need to go through my reserve tanks, and when she states it like THAT… WHOO BOY! There’s some big trouble heading our way and I’m worried about what may happen. So regardless of the results; by all means, I need you to protect that cogbot with all of your might. If she stays alive, then all humans left remaining still have a way to predict/avoid danger and as a man who loves her… if I somehow kick the bucket; I need you to promise me that she will live on, no matter what. Okay pops? Can you make that promise for me?”

I got teary-eyed for a hot minute and immediately gave CJ the manliest hi-five, manshake that I could.

I stated in response, “Don’t worry brother, I promise. If I must lose my life to protect her too, then so be it.”

CJ replied lionheartedly, “HAHA! THAT’S THE SPIRIT, POPS!! NOW LET’S GET BACK OVER THERE AND TAKE CARE OF WHATEVER THREAT COMING OUR WAY. AS REAL MEN DO, WE WILL MAKE SURE OUR WOMEN LIVE ON AND PROSPER. LET ALL MY WOMAN’S ENEMIES BE VANQUISHED IN THE NAME OF MOTHER NATURE!!!”

Together we roared out fierce battle-cries, “HOO-HA!! HOO-HA!! HOO-HA!!”

CJ and I returned triumphantly, ready to take on anything.

“Are you two done being idiots yet? What is all this hooting and hollering about,” the twerpy little cogbot, 3.14 questioned.

I was not ready for that insult. Very tempted to referring to some classical media name-calling, right about now…

“What was that you little,“ I stated but was interrupted, before I could finish that sentence.

“HEY CAP!!!” a voice off in the distance, yelled out with the top of their lungs.

What…? I recognize this voice anywhere, but I just can’t believe it. There’s no way, this is who I think it is.

The familiar voice shouted again, “GENERAL PATRICK!!!”

I turned around. Holy cow, I can’t believe it, but yet again… maybe I can. This guy will outlive anything, and he somehow manages to survive in an apocalypse too?

I replied joyously, “HEY CAPTAIN!”

Before me was my Bakehouse Grandpa, I thought I had left behind when I time traveled. It seems that no matter where I go, he will always be by my side.

I shouted with tears rolling down my face, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, CAPTAIN? HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO MAKE IT ALL THE WAY HERE, HUH? YOU HAVE TO BE WELL OVER 140 YEARS OLD BY NOW. YOU SURE ARE A SIGHT FOR SORE EYES. I HAVE TO SAY, NOTHING MAKES ME HAPPIER THAN TO SEE YOU. HOW ARE YOU?”

“THANK YOU, JESUS. NOW THAT I SEE YOU; I AM OKAY,” Jo replied wholeheartedly.

Jo ran to a mountain and back within less than 20 seconds. It seems that Jo is covered in a suit of plant armor. I wonder what his desires were.

“I SEE YOU GOT AN UPGRADE. LOOKS LIKE YOUR LEGS ARE NO LONGER A PROBLEM, YOU CAN FINALLY WORK AS HARD AS YOU’VE BEEN WANTING TOO,” I excitedly continued.

Jo extended his right hand to the sky, put his chin up and said from the bottom of his heart, “EVERYTHING YOU SAY, THANK YOU GOD.”

Italia interrupted us for a moment and said, “Muy bien! (Very good!) So, you’re familiar with our agricultural technician? Jo has been the greatest help in terms of helping the village grow and prosper. He focuses on farming and harvesting a majority of our village’s stock of fruit and vegetables. He also goes scouting for new ingredients/ potential plants for sustainability. On top of that he loves surrounding our village with exotic plants. Everybody loves Jo here, he truly is one of a kind.”

“Hahaha, it seems that no matter where he goes… Nobody can help it. You just can’t not love the guy,” I chuckled and replied in a sincere tone.

Ako joined in, “He’s also one of the fastest out of all of us. His only parallel in speed is CJ. Joseph is a very special case when it comes to the transformation of desires. He will only tell you one thing as his desire, but the Ancestors have prophesied to me a while ago; that he had a mix of desires all put forth to the maximum capacity.”

“GENERAL! YOU KNOW MY JESUS? MY POOR JESUS, I GIVE HIM TROUBLE. I CALL HIM EVERYDAY. PAT! YOU KNOW I AM SICK; I LOVE TO HELP!! WE WORKING ALL TOGETHER, PEACE AND LOVE. HALLELUJAH,” Jo emphasized as his plant armor wriggled about and created heart-shapes from the vines.

“So, your desire has always been the same, huh? Always looking out for others and helping anyone you can? You’re a good man…Captain,” I said.

Memories of Jo and I spent together started flooding in my head. Wow… Even in some crazy future, still; no one amazes me more than the captain.

Jo replied, “PAT… I DON’T KNOW ABOUT ME, BUT I KNOW YOU’RE A GOOD MAN. AMEN, AMEN, AMEN! PEACE AND LOVE. HALLELUJAH!”

Ako continued where he left off, “Charlie made sure to freeze Jo’s age so… There is no need to worry about that my godson. I believe that the desires he transformed into power are: number one to help and work as hard as possible, number two to grow new legs and number three to always be with the plants that he grew alongside his house at your job. I believe that when the spell hit Jo, he instantly fused with those plants. Alchemically, creating a new body that will help him accomplish his desires.”

Jo stated in his usual tone, “EVERYTHING YOU SAY, THANK YOU GOD. THE DOG SAYS ‘UP, UP, UP’ SO TOGETHER WE GO UP, UP, UP! I LIKE TO HELP, PAT! GENERAL, YOU WANT SOME COFFEE?”

CJ chimed in, “HAHAHA! YOU’VE GOT THE FUNNIEST SENSE OF TIMING, MR. JO!”

“THANK YOU, BOSS. I GOT COFFEE SO I’M SUPPOSED TO SHARE,” Jo replied resolutely.

CJ looked at me and said, “You’ve got the best role model in your hands, pops. When we talk about being the steadfast land for our queens, we’re really supposed to be like him. In the name of mother nature: we must stay true to ourselves, work as hard as possible and be relentless in doing the right thing.”

Jo insisted, “PAT! I GOT COFFEE.”

Oh my lands. I sure do love the guy, but I can’t handle anymore diarrhetic reactions to his coffee. I remember all those times I would drink his coffee, I did it because I knew it would make him happy. Who knows what exactly he puts in his coffee and what that did to my colon though…? Now THAT, is a different story. Besides, as heart-warming as this is… I believe this is not the moment to be sitting down and having a coffee break. I could’ve sworn something big was going to happen.

3.15 paused our conversation and said, “Get ready everyone. Danger is approaching—”

Right before she could finish that sentence a massive homunculus type of creature landed in front of us, as if a bomb dropped from the sky.

*KA-WHOOOOOOSSHHHHHH*

The air from the landing pushed out at winds going faster than 90 mph, nearly blowing all of us away and then got sucked back in towards the abysmal creature. Suddenly, most of us started dropping to our knees as our breath was getting stolen.

The massive homunculus had a crown that oozed like water, harpy legs, dragon wings, two gigantic arms and tentacles sticking out of its back. This being’s dark matter seemed to be a pitch more abysmal than the other’s we have faced so far.

“HELLO, YOU POMPOUS PESTS. I HEARD THAT A PORTION OF MY FAMILY HAS BEEN DEPLETED DUE TO YOUR LIGHT SORCERY. WELL, ENOUGH OF THE FUN AND GAMES. PREPARE YOURSELF! THE CONSEQUENCES ARE DIRE AND I WILL NOT STAND STILL ANYMORE. ALL THAT AWAITS YOU IS DEATH,” the homunculus roared.

Augusto pitched a light barrier from his shield around us, and we were able to catch our breathe again. Italia threw one of the shards of the Okuutuu Imola that she held onto, into the air.

Jo immediately jumped up, caught the shard and shouted, “OKAY, ITS TIME TO HELP!”

Italia also gave a shard to Ranger and just like a dog would, he ate it. Jo’s vines looked like they consumed the shard and Ranger started to grow bigger.

Jo’s plant armor was shining gloriously now, and he ran up to everybody; thus giving everyone an aloe vera mask and plant shoulder pads.

Jo stated as he bounced from person to person, “THANK YOU GOD. THESE WILL HELP YOU BREATHE!”

Italia tapped everyone with her tentacles while holding a shard of the Okuutuu Imola. All previous damage replenished itself, and we all felt battle-ready.

CJ split a part of himself. One part planted his roots in the ground and summoned tree cannons all throughout the grounds. The other part looked like a skinnier, agile version of CJ and held a sword made from tree bark.

“Two can play at this splitting game. HAHA! The game’s have only just begun,” CJ stated valiantly.

Ako shouted, “ANCESTORS! LEND ME YOUR POWER AND LET THE LIGHT OF ALL THAT HAS COME BEFORE US SHINE DOWN ON THE DARKNESS OF TODAY!!”

Ako’s raging bull energy was crackling off and the horns of the bull turned into a piercing blue color. His energy daggers look like they grew by a foot.

Augusto stated, “Okay team. We’ve been preparing for a moment like this for a while now. Let’s give it all we got. Jo, we’re going to need you to keep a safe distance in case all goes wrong, we can at least rely on you to help provide for the village back at home.”

Jo saluted and said, “OKAY, BOSS!”

CJ butted in, “Nina should also keep a safe distance. She can help forewarn the village of any disasters that may come.”

Augusto replied, “Okay you are right about that. We’ll need both of you to stay safe.”

“Who do YOU two think you’re vouching for? As important as my calculations are for humans, I will think and fight for myself,” 3.15 said as she pulled out two huge paper guns from her interdimensional box.

“YOU THINK A MEASLY BARRIER OF LIGHT LIKE THIS, CAN PROTECT YOU FOR LONG? I WILL BE THE JUDGE OF THAT. HERE I COME LITTLE SHEEP,” the enormous Ca’alrok homunculus growled.

“Alright…If you’re going to join in, then I have a request Nina,” CJ sighed.

3.14 replied, “Oh?”

“You know what time it is. Put the tunes on, and can you play my favorites,” CJ asked with a proud grin.

“Roger. Everyone… it’s time to go all out,” 3.14 stated affirmatively.

The monstrous homunculus began bashing their tentacles against Augusto’s barrier. A crack formed on the surface with every smack. 3.14 clicked a button on her gear antenna and it sounded like a record skipped for a moment.

Music started to fade into the battlegrounds, and it was… “Who Loves You” by Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons.

Augusto’s giant protective bubble shattered with another smack from our monster friend.

Augusto yelled out, “BREAK!”

Augusto hopped on two Buttons and flew off to the right side. 3.14 followed suit, the planted half of CJ stayed put and fired Okuutuu Imola charged cannons away with light imbued coconuts. I made a long mark from a wide slash. The mark felt my intentions and moved like a slithering snake when I hopped onto it. The mobile half of CJ hopped onto my mark and joined in on my ride. Maxx ran straight ahead to the enemy’s feet and started shooting some sound blasts at their feet. Italia started fighting off the beast’s tentacles with her own. Jo ran to the outskirts within a flash and cheered us on from the sidelines.

“GO, GO, GO!! YOU GOT THIS,” Jo shouted brilliantly.

Italia slapped the junk out of the beast’s tentacles. With every slap it left a stinging sensation.

Italia shouted like a warrior, “I’M GOING FULL GRANDMA-MODE ON YOU! BEWARE: I’VE GOT ALL THE COOKIES BUT I HAVE ALL THE SPICES TOO!”

Maxx had a shard of the Okuutuu Imola underneath his bandana and burst forth soundwaves that shined light. Maxx flipped around, somersaulted in the air, and inflicted some damage to the Homunculus’ feet.

Woah, I guess I was wrong about this guy. Not only can we trust him, but he will go straight to the forefront in the battle.

Maxx shouted as he blasted soundwaves, “YOU SHOULD’VE JOINED A TRUMP SUPPORT GROUP!!”

Well… It’s a start. We can trust him, but whew boy does he need some new catch phrases.

Augusto and 3.14 flew around to the beast’s backside.

Augusto casted 5 buttons towards the homunculus that started spewing out light, then he pointed his button shield to the sky. Focusing on the light shape he turned a barrier bubble into a massive axe and swung it into one of the colossal arms.

“AUWRGH!!! PESKY PIECES OF FODDER,” the Ca’alrok homunculus roared.

Ca’alrok swung his damaged arm towards Augusto, but the button alchemist evaded it. 3.14 put a shard of the Okuutuu Imola on top of the button in her antenna. It started glowing profusely and 3.14 started shooting beams of light-cast integers from her 2-D guns.

Each beam shot made a singeing sound every time that one hit the surface layer of Ca’alrok.

3.14 and planted CJ shot light-infused coconuts and beams in unison. Every shot matched the beat to the lines in “Who Loves You”.

~WHO LOVES YOU PRETTY BABY? WHO’S GONNA HELP YOU THROUGH THE NIGHT? WHO LOVES YOU PRETTY MAMA. WHO’S ALWAYS THERE TO MAKE IT, WHO LOVES YOU? WHO LOVES YOU PRETTY BABY?~

Adventure
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Patrick Oleson

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